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Mind Numbing....

mysticalwolf71's picture

Every day is mind numbing around SD13. The other day I noticed that as soon as I left a room, SD13 would talk to my DH. then when I came back into the room she would stop talking to him. Now we all know when people do this around you. You think they are talking behind your back. Well I'm not pulling any punches, so I spoke up and ask SD13 if she is talking about me. She states No I'm not, so I look to DH to find out. He states no she wasn't talking about you, She was telling me about her day at school. I asked SD13 why she stopped talking to DH when I came in the room. She stated she doesn't want to talk around me or talk to me. I looked at her and said fine. So I left the room. To me I could care less if she wanted to talk around me or to me. Less head aches.

But later on I was watching 2 and a half men, when SD11 came out and was telling me about what her teacher said at school. Well I started laughing about what was said. Well SD13 spoke up and tried to tell me what happen to her at school. Well don't you know I stopped sd13 and stated you don't want to talk around me remember. So I don't want to hear it.

Well if looks could kill I would be dead. I told her not to look at me like that. I told her she can not have it both ways. You talk to me or you don't.
Well sD13 explains she only wants to talk to me when she wants to. I said well what about when I don't want to hear you. You do not control me or what I do, if you want a puppet I will buy you one.

This little monster SD13 is looking to get dropped kicked too the moon. I haven't dropped kick her yet, haven't laid a hand on her but she is pushing it.

SD13 is always playing mind games like this. it's just Mind Numbing. if I leave it allone then she walks around with a smile, like she got one up on me.

Comments

BMJen's picture

That's my first thought. Second, what did DH say when she said she didn't want to talk to you??

She sounds like a spoiled rotten little thing that just might need that drop kicking........or dare I say, a dad who actually won't let her talk to you like that maybe?? Just maybe that'd help!

******Mountain Dew and Beer is what makes me a better step mom. Smile *******

mysticalwolf71's picture

DH looked at me and I smiled at him. He didn't say a word to her. He knew it would come back to bite her in the a**. She plays these games with him too.

Well later when I gave it back to SD13, DH was there. He stated to her you asked for it, now deal with it.

BMJen's picture

if she had been told right then and there that kind of rudness and disrespect to you will not be tolerated. Of course that is hard to get out of some DH's sometimes. Atleast he didn't get mad at you when you dished it back out.

I really don't understand though. If my BS said something like that to my DH I would probably smack him. If his daughter did that to me the same would be for her. Okay, maybe not smack, but a serious come to Jesus speech would happen. I just don't understand why that would be okay with him?

Not to fuss about your DH, sounds like he stood up for you when you did it back. I just don't get it is all.

******Mountain Dew and Beer is what makes me a better step mom. Smile *******

mysticalwolf71's picture

In the past we have yelled at her, DH and myself right when it happen. She would turn around and do it again. SD13 act like she wants to push it to the point where we nock her on her a**.
That's what she wants, so she can turn around and call children and youth on us again.
We've been their done that. He beat her ass for stealing money and the next day Children and Youth were here. She told them she got her a** beat for eating food and that we locked her in her room everyday. Which in the end the case worker found it all to be untrue. Her lock on her door is on the inside of her room.

She is pushing the issues in hopes to try and bait us. I mhope this clears things up. So I come her to vent because we are stuck. me I'm afraid they will take bio-bots and SD11. As for SD13 I hate to say it I don't care.

sam's picture

give her a punishment if she keeps doing this over and over and just talking to her is not enough send her to her room and take away something that is valuable to her for a day.Tell her that that sort of rudness is just not going to be tolerated!!

Sita Tara's picture

We have the same SD (minus/plus variations in behaviors of course!)

I LOVE what you said. My DH would appreciate it (maybe not this week as he has already heard too much about how my week went.) But later, I will share it with him.

I had a moment like that I posted on here before. SD had shouted many times to me- "You are NOT my mom, you can't tell me what to do!" last year. So DH and I decided she had to go through him for everything and if he wasn't available she couldn't do it. This included non-essential rides (like sports practices.) If she couldn't arrange a ride to with another friend's parent (DH then picked them up to return the favor) then she couldn't do it.

SD asked me to do something for her- can't remember now. But it was a favor. I said no. She started yelling/criticizing that I don't work, what's so important, why can't I treat her like I do the boys.

I said, "If I am not your mom when it comes to parenting you, correcting your behavior, or discussing consequences with you, then I am not your mom when you want something fun either. It's all or nothing I'm afraid."

SHE WAS PEEEVED and went storming off with OH MY GODS! etc. I chuckled. Out loud. That made her more angry. Which of course made me more than chuckle. She is ridiculous in that state, if I can just step back and laugh. And SHE ABSOLUTELY hates when I find her ridiculousness funny.

I'm sure your SD is likewise affected.

"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra

mysticalwolf71's picture

I'm telling you this child SD13, I've never in my life met a child like her. I used to be a pre-school teacher. I loved it and loved working with kids. But after we got SD13 when she was 5 and raising her until now 13. I left pre-school teaching after the first year with SD13. couldn't do it. I was afraid my anger would come out while I was at work.
She has been like this sence day one. it never gets better, she has gotten way worse. I can't wait for her to hit puberty. oh h*ll will break loose.

sam's picture

doing what your doing sending her to her room eventually the childrens worker will think she is a problem child.Does she have add or adhd?

mysticalwolf71's picture

Both my Bio-boys have ADHD. I have no problems with them. kids are kids. My oldest is 19 now and youngest is 14. I have never had problems like this with them.

But having her tested is a great idea. I talk to DH at launch about it. He agrees. We are done being punished for being her for her and taking care of her. when BM wants nothing to do with skids.

sam's picture

was antsy at school so his teacher asked if i have ever had him checked for adhd.So i took him to the doctor and they said that he doesnt fit the criteria for adhd but i researched alot about it and talked to other people whos children have this and it could be very upsetting if it is not treated.I had one friend whose son would break windows and things to that extreme.Maybe that could be a possability and i believe from what i have read and learned it is a genetic thing.

sam's picture

That it works out for you and your dh it sounds like it is an emotionally draining problem.

Done's picture

I have SD's 12&13 I think it is the age. I think they are just trying to be uber bitches just like their Mommies. I love how they all think that they are blessing us with any kind of attention from them and we should be grateful for any kind of crap they throw our way. They just don't know I love it when they ignore me and have nothing to do with me!!

SM#1's picture

my SD9 only starts talking to H when I start talking to him. She trys to pull his attention and just starts talking over me! My H usually tells her to shut up...he can hear me. Yeah I get one of those death looks then too. And I didn't tell her to shut up, I just stop talking. But since she is the liar of the year I am sure she tells BM that I was the one to tell her to shut up.

Its one of those attention getting techniques she is so well known for.

My SD does the opposite yours does but believe me it is not greener on the other side!!