a few times but unfortunately he kept getting reeled back in from her lies (DH is a bit of a pushover--dont tell) and sadly, SD was a trap. they were never married and she lied to get pregnant. i guess she just wanted to have a baby and my DH was the poor sucker she tricked into it. i wont go into anything further there except the reason she hates me and makes life hard for us is, in my opinion, bc i am living the life she always wanted, and tried to force him into. after she got pregnant, she even bought herself a ring and tol dpeople he proposed, hoping that he would just go along w it and she could manipulate him into that too. thank god that didnt work bc the CS alone is hard enough to swallow...i dont think i could take alimony too...actually, i KNOW i couldnt. lets be honest.

"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin

Same as bellacita here. BM lied about allergy to condoms and said she was on birth control. Neither were true. Tried to force BF to marry her or never see the child agrain. BM has a sad life, divorced (some guy after BF who fell for her ploy), lives in a trailer her parents purchases, declared bankrupty, heavy drinker and smoker. BF has made a success off himself despite being made a father at a young age against his will. BM loves to try and make our lives miserable because her's is.

I can add to that one. They were broken up and he started seeing someone else and she was lucky enough to have gotten pregnant and they got married two months later.

But then my genius husband proceeded to have two more planned pregnancies with her.

Their breakup was based on numerous factors and I think the two of them are equally guilty of contribuiting to the demise of the marriage.

"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley

the first one I got from DH, and to this day , still rings true. BM cheated on him several times through out their "marriage", and he confessed the reason they were even married in the first place was she got pregnant. When he got together with her, she told him she was barren, and he bought it. They went on and had 2 kids, my DH did not want SD to be an only child like BM was, cause BM said how lonely and spoiled you can be....whatever.......My DH was unhappy, and threw himself into his work, and was not home much.he admits was not a good thing to do. He and BM broke up several times, she could not stay faithful, and he was amazed that she would just "lie down" with anyone, and her alcoholisim,and mental instability got worse. BM always used the skids as pawns to lure him back when it fit her. And loved making him feel quilty for being a "bad father, and not a good enough husband" My DH said recently to me that he was not ready for any of it....being married, the kids, house responsibilities....he just let it all happen. He loves his kids, no matter, and always has. He took care of them when BM "could not deal". But he did not want things to happen so fast, and did not have plans on staying w/ BM in the first place. He is angry that she tricked him, and then cheated and lied her way through their relationship. Although he is not free of any wrong doing....ignoring her after she started cheating, putting his job first, and being selfish in his own way.....made for a giant mess!!! So I say, the reason for the break up was pure ignorence from two people who should have never gotton together in the first place. "~waiting on the world to change~"

"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere

she told him she was taking birth control pills. So they moved in together. Didn't get married, but had the second child 4 years later. Then a thrid (he thought) two years after that. Turned out the third wasn't his (she had a DNA test-cause she wanted to be with her bf). I actually have very little to do with her-tho she did send me a thank you note for taking such good care of SD13 a couple of years ago, before H and I got married, and I spent alot of time trying to help SD13 (then 10) with her schoolwork.

But, H makes sure any conversations he has with BM are out of my earshot. Which is wrong. I don't expect, or want to be included in their discussions (unless it's something that will have an affect on me), but the way he keeps it all so secretive from me is quickly becoming another issue between he and I.

Believe it or not, two weeks after we married, he announced that SD13 would be coming to live with us. Which really wouldn't be living with us-as he works out of state and has an apartment he stays in during the week there. It would have been SD13 living with me. None of this was mentioned before we married. I wasn't even asked (it's my home). He just informed me that she would be living with us (me). He and BM had it all planned out. When I refused (told him I just finished raising my own son alone-I wasn't about to raise HIS daughter alone), he blew up-told me he would rent an apartment for him and his daughters in the city where he works. Not him and his daughters and me. Nope. Just him and his daughters. Well, he ended up not renting anything-it would've cost him an additonal $1,000/mo to do so, and we live rent free here. Fun way to start a marriage, huh?

ignoring her after she started cheating...forgot to include that insted of leaving her, he would take her back and "forgive" her, then punish her by ignoring her, and not coming home, staying out partying, to rebell against what she did to him. I don't condone cheating....but I feel that this was not the right way to deal with it."~waiting on the world to change~"

honestly, why would u knowingly have a baby against the mans wishes when u KNOW he does not want to have a child w u??? dating someone is different from having a child w them...what dont they get?? this is not doing the kid any favors by bringing it into the world under these circumstances!!!

"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin

Not that my DH is a man of great wealth....but he did ok. He was doing really well when BM met him. She also got to see that "soft side" of him , and she knew he would "take care of everything", when she got pregnant. She, in her mind , scored well with that one. "~waiting on the world to change~"

It was BM's second marriage to my now DH -she abandoned her then baby daughter with her first husband-met DH -he settled for the fact that he would never have bio children and looked after the little girl (BM got her back once she and DH were together -being the non-maternal type and he is very maternal-he raised the little girl -who NEVER calls him today and he adores her)! Her bio daughter has not talked to her in a few years due to the pain and abandonment my now SS's BM (her mom) put her through as a teen.

In Canada -back in the 90's we had a fully government funded IVF program (to help our dwindling population) -BM and DH decided in 1991 to try the program as her tubes were tied AND long story short they had SS Zippy -the very next year -apparently she had SS because she "thought" DH wanted a Bio child -and he went for it as he thought she wanted another baby-so neither really a good reason and now in their 50's My DH and SS Bio Mom are stuck with a teenager (more like I am) and she lives happily every after on "disability" (more like welfare) for fibremyalgia, has not worked a day in about 10 years now- a few miles away from us in her paid for by the Canadian Government brand new townhouse-her personal life blew up because of her bad life choices- her 25th significant other passed away from cancer two years ago-her back-up (now my DH) has full custody of SS as she signed him over when her life blew up-she SAYS she would like him EOW-but DH decided it was not in Zippy's best interest-Soooo-now that she is not a Mother on paper-she refuses to talk to us and IF Zippy wants to visit her HE has to make all the arrangements and she will only drive one way. Fun Huh?

Step Parenting – you might need to step back before you step in something!

And she was the one who wanted out. He actually tried to get her to work everyhting out so that they could save their marriage. I met him about a year after they split up. He says that he had moved on at that point but sometimes I wonder.

It might explain why he could not pull his head out of her ass for such a long time.

Sorry, I am kind of bitter today. I am feeling fed up and worn out.

As Dh tells it, Bm told him that it was safe to have unprotected sex.....HA! She was 19 and he was 20. They weren't married. In fact, Dh was planning on breaking up with her right before she told him she was pregnant. She dropped the bomb when he was studying for college finals. Well......of course.....he failed all of them! Nice!

I'm pretty sure that she wanted him to marry her and take her away from her parents house. Bm's dad was a big loser. Dh didn't marry her but did move in to Bm's mother's house after ss was born to be able to help out. Which, to Bm, meant she had two built in babysitters, her mom and Dh.

Ss wasn't even a year old when, yet again, Bm told Dh that she was on the pill. Maybe she was, maybe she wasn't but either way it didn't work and she ended up pregnant again. Bm hated being a mother to ss. She told Dh's sister this. Since she never wanted to be a mother to her first child (ss) so she certainly wasn't going to have this second child. So, against Dh's protests, Bm had an abortion. Dh was devastated. Dh still stayed with her.

Sometime after ss was a year old, the police and the FBI came to Bm's parent's house looking for Bm's father. Turned out that he had robbed a bank 2 times and tried a third, to get money to support a gambling habit. The police were looking for the money that they thought Bm's father had hidden at his house. They didn't find it. I think some time later Bm's mother found it and spent it, but that's just hearsay. Bm's father eventually went to federal prison for his crimes, but that's another chapter.

Anyway, Dh ended up catching Bm cheating on him with a cook from the greasy spoon where she was a waitress. He followed them and busted her red handed. I think the whole thing was a ploy and she thought that Dh would come crawling back to her. However, he found his own place and eventually met me. The rest is history.

Bm has "moved on" numerous times. She's still moving as we speak.

Dawn

and had numerous affairs. She's moved on to many, many, many "others", but I dont think she will ever move on from the emotional attachment she seems to have for him.

Because that's what you do in the military - I swear, it's a cultural thing. He was 22 and she was 19, quick and dirty courtship. After a year, she gave him an ultimatum about wanting a baby - she had been fired from at least two jobs by that point, guess she thought it was something to do. He agreed by not doing anything to prevent it (dumbass!) and she got pregnant right as he was going to ship her home to her mama. He felt obligated to stay and try to work it out. Of course, she cheated on him, wouldn't keep a job, threatened to take his daughter away. He divorced her and REMARRIED HER (I didn't find out until we got our marriage license) after her second pregnancy (not his) was stillborn. She cheated on him repeatedly and told him she wanted a divorce during a "morale VTC" from Afghanistan in 2002. She got pregnant again before the divorce was final, so now SD has a 8-years-younger half brother who she gets stuck taking care of most of the time because BM's life is sooooo hard, being forced to hold a job and all.

He changed jobs to one that deploys more than any other, and deployed 6 times in the next three years. He was a total man-whore too, but took care to wrap it up. We met when we were both intent on playing the field - he broke off a date with another woman the day after he met me. We just.... clicked. There wasn't anyone else for either of us after the day we met. Obsessed, maybe, but we've been obsessed for almost three years now.

My FH had a relationship with this pathetic creature and she somehow put together a sob story and moved in with him. While living together he found out what a whack job she was and broke up with her. She used every excuse in the book not to leave his house and he was so stupid - HE FELT SORRY FOR HER - she had not friends and sat home and just read the bible all day and went to church (all of a sudden tried to turn in to a saint). Well they were basically roomates for a couple of months and my FH got a g/f and one night he was out and got so drink on tequila his g/f had to drive him home. When he woke up the next day the BM was in the bed and he practically shit himself and she was like oh im so happy and threw up and threw her out of his room. He kept telling her to get out and was threating to her have physically removed but she kept giving him a sob story - then 6 weeks later guess what I'm pregnant your going to marry me know right??? WTF? He was like I don't love you your crazy I want you out of my house and she left THAT DAY after trying to get her out for 3mths. AND HE HAS BEEN PAYING FOR THIS MISTAKE AND DEALING WITH THIS MANIPULATIVE BITCH FOR 16 YEARS AND WAS A BITTER BROKEN MAN TIL I MET HIM. gag!!!!!