Sooo almost 5 years on from when my boyfriend and I moved in together along with the 3 step kids we know have 2 together. On the outside it all seems fine but slowly it seems to be tearing me apart. I have put all my effort into making the SK's a home they can feel comfortable in and are now happy to come to BUT I am so very very tired of parenting them when their own parents do little if anything to support all the good progress I've made with them. When I first starting being a part of their lives the then 10yr old boy couldn't wipe his bum properly, eat witha knife and fork and many more things a boy of that age should have been doing. The then 8yr old girl was pretty good although with the meanest temper (that I can deal with) and we get to the then 4yr old girl who couldn't do ANYTHING for herself not even slip on a pair of jandals (flip flops or whatever you call them in your worlds!) It was a huge fight everyday to get them to dress, eat and bathe. Now they are better but it has really taken it's toll on me I am tired of doing all the work with what seems like little reward. The now 8yr old girl is rediculously spoilt and babied, she refuses to speak properly, it is a huge battle to get her to try to do anything for herself, she is basically where her older brother was when I first met him and worse, there's something else about this kid, I just cannot warm to her at all, lord knows I've tried. She screams and wails when she doesn't get her own way and as soon as she is reprimanded in anyway uses the "I miss Mommy" card so that everyone will feel sorry for her. I was thinking about her the other day and there is not one single instance that I can recall where she has been genuinely nice without wanting something in return. She cannot share with our younger children and is becoming hugely overweight due to the fact that she refuses to eat anything remotely healthy, even a muffin if it contains fruit! I really don't like her she is a nasty kid who tries to manipulate my 2.5yr old daughter who obviously thinks shes the mutt nuts. I know it's awful but I just wish that she was go and live with her mother full time. I feel terrible about the way I feel about the SK's but every other week when they are with us (shared custody, week on week off) my jaw tightens, my stomach is in knots and I change into this grumpy hardened person who I dislike.