Oh what could be better than this? I have a SS16 who won't get a job here because he has one where his BM is (in another state..and without our permission btw). He won't walk a mile or two to look for one but will mention so and so is hiring..and when I take the time to look it up.. "its too far to walk to" so I say "ride a scooter or skateboard" i get "too much effort". lol. So my canned reply is "sorry that you choose to feel that way". We FINALLY got over the hump of hearing "i need a job, i need money" to now.. "too many people, i'm competing against every other teenager" etc etc.. I think I have hear so many excuses that I could literally write a book about it! "How to Not Apply Yourself.. a Teen's perspective on Life!"

We are also doing the driver's permit. Now keep in mind this is a child that lies, steals, shows no remorse and just doesn't seem to care. This is a HUGE point of contention for DH and I. DH is looking for a beater car to purchase (assuming we get a tax refund this year). I keep telling my DH that look. If SS16 wants a car.. let him show it by getting a job to pay for insurance and gas and upkeep. We can't afford the additional insurance (about $400.00 per month) and SS16 refuses to apply himself to pull the grades to get a discount for good grades.

We are struggling every month to pay the bills.. (which keep coming of course) stretching food budgets out and have cut out everything that is not essential! But the SS16 only sees his pity party of I don't have a car... I don't have a job here because I don't need one.. which is followed by I don't have any money (our house is xerascaped.. no lawn mowing to be done.. ergo nothing to do to get an allowance... and he won't clean unless told to.. tried chore charts and the only one that ever did that was BS9!)

So here is the issue: DH is emailing and physically looking at vehicles with the intent to purchase for SS16 (who is his BS.) SS16 keeps taking the paper to DH as SS16 knows that my response is "have you found a job yet?". SS16 was "given" a car by a family member in another state that has to stay there and that has to never be sold must stay in "their" family or return to the person that is allowing the use. We do NOT have SS16 on any auto insurance at all. But DH won't say or do anything because in his mind the BM doesn't care. "What difference does it make? She doesn't care" is what he says. I tell my DH that it matters because he is showing that he is a PARENT!

aarrrggghhh I just want to rip out my hair!!! Has anyone gone through this recently or can you give me some tips? When I got my first car I had to PAY for insurance, my license and fees AND a payment to my parents every month for the car. BUT I had a JOB and pulled GREAT grades! AND that was AGES ago!!!