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What would you do with the money? OR, more boundaries NOW, please...

fractioned's picture

So tonight is the big Mega Millions drawing - half a billion dollars! SO and I both bought tickets. We were discussing what we would each do with the money on the way to work today. Here's the scary part of the conversation:

SO: "I wonder if it would be better to start the addition to the house, or just get a bulldozer and start over?"

Me: "You'd seriously want to stay where you're at if you had that much money?"

SO: "It's SS7's home."

Me: "It's a good home, SO. I can see why you'd want to do that."

SO: "Maybe I'd buy the plot next door, knock that house down and then build a new house there! Then I could let BM and her BF rent the old one."

Me: "..." (Laughing) "Why would you want to do that?"

SO: "Then SS7 and I could play whenever we wanted."

Me: "..."

"...seriously?"

SO: "I'll need something to sight my new rifle on, anyway..."

OMG. I don't know if he was kidding, or if he's really thinking that it would be a good idea to live NEXT DOOR to his ex-wife who has no sense of boundaries. She comes over multiple times a week as it is. I've yet to ask again, but I really hope he was kidding.

I need some book ideas for this man. I've already got Stepmonster, but I'm hoping more for some single father-focused books that talk about the whys and hows of severing ties with the ex. Maybe if it's coming from somewhere other than my mouth, it'll make more sense to him. I want to stay away from second marriage focused books, since we're not there yet and I don't want to make him think I'm trying to drive him into another marriage when he's just getting rid of the first one. Any ideas?

Speaking of which - update on the divorce proceedings: SO fired his lawyer last week, but since they have the paperwork the lawyer drafted, SO and the BM are going to do it themselves. BM has the paperwork and is going to prepare her response. Apparently she'll bring it over this weekend for SO to sign, and they'll take it down to the courthouse on Monday. PLEASE let this happen this week, and PLEASE PLEASE don't let them screw it up!

Comments

fractioned's picture

Even funnier would be BM being within garden hose range when she decides to spend the afternoon sunbathing... }:)

Aislinn81's picture

Divorce Poison was always one of my favorites.

LOL. My office bought a combined ticket today as well. However, my DH said if we won, he was paying BM off (to shut her up) and we were buying a bigger house wherever I wanted. Woohoo! We are stuck in our current house because of the last court battle until another mod or until the skids graduate in 10 freaking years. }:)

Lauren1438's picture

my FDH is trying to get me to move to the same town as BM. I will not go! But live right next door, I would need a shovel and a nice spot in the woods.....

But honestly It would all go in my name so BM would never see a penny.

Aislinn81's picture

Here they just snag it if you're in arrears. And they can't touch it if I bought the ticket. Not that I'd actually allow DH to ever get in arrears for CS in the first place, but I've never seen anyone get a modification based off lottery winnings.

But yeah, I'd have no issue paying her off to leave us the crap alone. It'd be so worth it.

fractioned's picture

We were also talking about what to do with the ticket if his won (since the divorce isn't final)... I figure it's better to let her have half so she'll go away instead of keeping it and letting her go for alimony. Why cut a check once a month when you can just cut one and have done with it?

I wonder... if I won, and we got married later - would she have any way of going after our money then? That's a scary thought.

purpledaisies's picture

I would first pay off all our debt and cars and the house then buy a bigger house somewhere else and rent this one out.

Then set up accounts for all the kids and one for us and live off the interest.

however the biggest problem we would have would be Yuck wanting to get her hands on it. So we thought we would put it in someone elses name. Yep Yuck would argue that she deserves half of it. I will NOT have it. Sorry ladies but I wouldn't give her a penny! But you see money doesn't pay her off and make her go away. She just wants to make life hell for us no matter what. Even if we offered to still pay CS and take one or all the boys she wouldn't do it.

fractioned's picture

The odds of any of us hitting the jackpot are so close to nil as to mean just about nothing.

There are existing boundary issues in our situation - what my SO said is just a funny reflection of them that I thought I would share. BM is constantly present, even in a distant fantasy of financial freedom.

teristepmom's picture

At this point i would disappear and leave FH with nothing but an international cell number on which he could reach me once he got his endless divorce finished, his kids on their own 2 feet, and his head out of his ass! When - and if - that call ever came and IF I were not in the arms of a charming man with NO children who actually seemed to LIKE me once in a while - I MIGHT return his call!

Jsmom's picture

Get the book Boundaries...Title says it all. Not a bad read, just too long and does have religous undertones...

GoodbyeNormaJean's picture

If we won, I'd GIVE BM our house and move right out of the country. See ya later, Bitch!

RainbowsAndDaisies's picture

LOL!!! This sounds exactly like something my dh would say (minus the bm moving in next door bit). Every house we move into, he wants to buy it and the neighbors and bulldoze the neighbors house to build a go cart track. lol i swear men are just little boys in grown up bodies - they want to knock stuff down with big trucks and then build something cool.

fractioned's picture

Haha! I wouldn't mind the go-kart track! Hell, they can put in a 20 foot half pipe if they want! Just... no BM within earshot of my lawnmower. No. No way.

Lalena75's picture

I'd pay off my house and let my exH rent it from me, then build my sweet lil dream house and finish my college degree and travel with my degree and my kids and their tutor SO can catch up when his stupid divorce is over. He bought a ticket then realized if he won half would go to BM since they aren't divorced yet and he gave his to me. So I've got 50$ worth of chances and will probably get nothing but hey can't win if you don't play.