You are here

Just a few things.............

FML's picture

Just a few things that have been bugging the living shit out of me.

-I hate it when BM "finds God." This is absolutely the most annoying thing in the WORLD! Here she is flashing random guys for their birthdays. Sleeping with random guys and not knowing who the baby daddy is and in the next whip of a head she is on her knees. Well she is on her knees in one way or another but you know what I mean. It just bugs the living hell out of me. I am TTC also and she keeps telling everyone how blessed she is by God and I just must not be on God's favorite list. I mean SERIOUSLY! Christian? I think cult!

-FDH works offshore. He gets SS the entire time that he is home so I never get alone time with FDH EVER! I mean we go out on a date night but we never just get to have drama free time. SS4 is seriously messed up because of all of his mother's shit. By the time we get him back to his old self it's time to send him back. Not only that, but the constant drama when we have him is ridiculous. It makes it next to impossible for FDH to enjoy his time off at home. I just wish we could allow for some time for SS not to be with us while FDH is home. I know it sounds selfish but I am so tired of being stressed out. Things are hard for everyone right now and I am definitely feeling it.

-I really want ME back. It has been so long since I have had time to be me. I am very OCD and like everything to be perfect. I waste so much time worrying and arranging and making plans. I think I have forgotten who I am. I think that's what I am giving myself for a Christmas present. I just want to spend some time writing or reading or for goodness sakes just staring at the wall if that is what I want to do. I used to have so many wants and needs and now it's about everyone else. I know that my kids come first and I know that it's important to help your family but I want me to be important for once.

Comments

Peaceful's picture

I understand your pain about wanting it to be about you from time to time. You were you for years then when you are blessed enough to find love you have to share him with everyone else and expect to take on the role of wife, stepmom, not to mention anything else you've got going, with nothing but smiles and giggles. Take the time you need for yourself because if you're not happy, no one else will be either. And don't let anyone else tell you that you're wrong or selfish because there's nothing wrong with taking care of self from time to time. Hope it gets better Smile

caregiver1127's picture

Tell your DH that when he comes home you need one day and night with him alone - it is just as important for you two to have alone time together as it is for him to have time with his son. If you don't do this it could seriously effect your marriage - you need to have your DH and how he would act without his son there causing problems - I am sure that Dh is not much fun!! Sorry you have to go through this.

steppedonmommy's picture

i wish i had known about this site yrs ago so I COULD have vented sooner,
and you should know ur not selfish u r his wife and deserve ur timr alone with him it is very important. i was always made to feel that i was inconsiderate and we never had time alone.i think daughters r more posses
ive of their daddys. i wish i had stood up and took some me time and shed less tears.