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Here we go again

FavSM's picture

Well like I stated in an earlier blog Bm is trying to tke the boys to maryland. Well our attorney advised us to get married which isnt a big deal weve been engaged for almost a yr and together for 2 yrs so we went ahead and set a date,and then later that night found out we were pregnant, were thrilled but this is my 1st pregnancy and my first and hopfully only wedding:) so I do not want to be pregnant at it and or planning it at the same time. Well after alot of argueing and discussing about when and if we should just go to the court house(which neither of us want to do and our attorney doesnt want us to either) with our attorney we settled on a date its roughly 7 months after the baby will be born, but also roughlu 1 month b4 BM wants to move, but our attorney is going to prolong everything with paperwork so we can get marrried in the fall and not right after the baby is born. I was having a very hard time with all this bc i want to enjoy both of these big events in my life and not be doing them on BM terms which is what i felt like but i am happy with our choice and I am doing my beat to not let her ruin this for me, and not stress me out. But 2day we got a call from our attorney, a few weeks ago BM attorney wrote our attorney a letter stating all therse thing DF wasnt doing or doing wrong and seriously 9 out of 10 of the issues were out right lies and we can prove some of them were but thats besides the point bc now bc of this letter we are getting another home visit, this makes 3 in less then 2 yrs and the first 2 we passed with flying colors, and we have nothing to hide its just a pain the the butt and a lil nerve racking to have someone go thru your house ya know, so does anyone have any tips or advice on lil things to do b4 they come?

Comments

Sia's picture

if you have been through it before, it should be a piece of cake for you. Congrats on the baby, don't stress yourself out to much about it, you really need to focus on the baby! Wink

DESGUIZED ANGEL's picture

The attorney that I worked for did Social Studies, samething you having to do. The attorney would sit and talk to the family, then mom and dad, then child(ren). Then she would ask for a tour of the home. Here's what she looked for: 1. rooms 2. is the house "to" clean 3. Does the house dirty or just "lived" in 4. amount of food in fridge and cabinets 5. kid accessories. If your house is impecable, then you cleaned up and might have something to hide, so she would dig further, which would mean more visits...unannounced. What kind of picture did your (step)child(ren) paint of the relationship in the home. If you have a toddler, do you have toddler toys in the livingroom arranged neatly...which shows that the whole family participates in play-time. If you have a teenager, do you have appropriate toys?? games, etc out? If you have an older kid, what kind of things do you have to keep them busy? Things like that. Don't over clean your home...leave the Spring cleaning to do during the spring! Pick up and make sure things are neat and orderly, but don't go out of your way to do it. Make sure that you have a "pleasent" day with your child, if they are older. Make sure that you leave them in a good mood...pissy kids can put a damper on the whole situation. They can't comprehend that what they do or say will help or hender your case. Smile My best advice as someone who has been on the other side of the fence, is to just act naturally. Smile Go out an have dinner or do something enjoyable after the visit, the kids will associate the visit with doing something fun and you will be able to relax afterwards.