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OT: I look like a HOT A$$ MESS

bellladonna's picture

There I said it. And it's the truth. Sad I came to this realization yesterday when I was at the mall. There was a woman there shopping who I presume to be a SAHM like myself (she had her kid with her and it was 10am). She was wearing yoga pants, Sketchers, and a hoodie, her hair was in a bun and she wasn't wearing any makeup.

As I walk passed her I thought to myself she looks like a H.A.M. (hot ass mess). Then I looked down at myself and I was wearing the exact same outfit (except I was wearing Nikes). I have really let myself go.

Before DH and skid drama I used to be a total fashionista. But the whole situation has sent me into a depression. I am finally coming out of it.

I never ever wore tennis shoes or yoga clothes outside of the gym. But now this has become my everyday attire. I only wear real clothes 2 or 3 times a week. I know, it's so pathetic.

I am in desperate need of a makeover. I want to put together a "mom uniform". Something that I can put on that looks pulled together and is fairly comfortable.

Ladies, can you help me out? What's your mom uniform?

Gents, what do you like to see your wife wearing?

Comments

bellladonna's picture

Jeans for me are the like the Holy Grail. I have a super small waist and a big bum (that's gotten even bigger after I had DD). So it's really hard for me to find jeans. They always gap at the waist. The only jeans that look good on me are the high waist jeans. Thank goodness they are "in" this fall.

SMof2Girls's picture

Find a few pairs that fit you through the butt, hips, and legs. You can take them to a tailor to have the waist pulled in. As a professional seamstress, my mom did simple alterations like this all the time .. you'd be surprised at the difference it makes and it's typically pretty affordable.

B22S22's picture

Levi jeans -- they make them with "demi curve" and I forget the other ones -- but they're cut different than regular jeans, curvier in the waist for those (of us) with bigger hips/butt/thighs. I have 3 or 4 pairs of them and I love them!

Tuff Noogies's picture

absolutely these!!! they fit so well w/o gaping at the waist that i went on ebay and bought 4 more pairs at once!

bellladonna's picture

I love cotton dresses in the summer. The few times I wear real clothes it's almost always cotton dresses. I live in Indiana, so I don't think that will work in the winter here. But I can probably wear them through the fall.

just.his.wife's picture

It is really really hard as a mom... let alone a SAHM where your surrounded by the little suckers all day.. to remember "woman first - mom second"

I made the comment to DH at one point that as a mom I did not feel attractive. Thats when he let me peek inside a mans brain for a moment.

(Yes, it is true, if you split open their heads out falls about a million furry triangles and 2 million boobs.. that is all thats in here)

He doesn't see me as a "mom" he advised me I was his MILF.

Initially I was kind of offended what do you mean all you see is boobs and beaver?

Then I realized well... yeah I would rather him see me that way then a frazzled mess wearing one sock, hair askew and in my comfy nighty (the sight he sees every morning).

So my "mom" attire is meant to rev his engine a bit and keep it revved.

Short skirts/mini dresses at home... they can even be comfy.. but above the knee, just a bit of cleavage.

I am not big on makeup around the house, but a lightly tinted lip gloss can make it seem like your wearing makeup when your not.

PeanutandSons's picture

Skinny Jeans a tank and fljp flops is my mom uniform. once I wean lil man my dresses will come back into rotation.

Unfreakingreal's picture

LOL, if I were to be honest with myself, I'd have to admit that I too look like shit 99% of the time. I work outside the home and it is a very casual office where jeans and tee's are the norm. I do wear a lot of Chuck Taylors aka Converse with dark rinse jeans and v-neck tee's. Now it's fall, so I wear jeans, Converse, long sleeved tee's with chunky cable knit sweaters. I wear pashminas for a pop of color. I usually slick my hair back in a neat bun and I don't wear any make up, but I do use a very good Serum and then a Black Sea Moisturizer by Edward Bess that makes my skin glow. I am too lazy to put my contacts in and wear my goofy glasses all the time. However, if I am going out with the DH or with friends, I glam it up and most days I'm unrecognizable. It's amazing what make up and a nice outfit does for a woman.

Lalena75's picture

I'm not a SAHM in fact sadly I only had my maternity leave with both kids (6 weeks with the first I had benefits with the second and got 12 weeks) and right before my youngest started school I had 3 months of unemployment as a SAHM.
But right now I'm working only on call and I'm in school. I'm pretty sure most of the day I'm a hot mess too. In fact right now I'm in my fav yoga pants that are 5 yrs old a silky tank pajama top and my hair is gross with a leave in deep oil treatment so I feel like I haven't washed in days.
Since I do have school later I refuse to leave the house a hot mess, so I'd hit goodwill a little bit back, got some awesome jeans (SO helped pick them out he says they make my butt look great) a pair of goodwill ankle boots and a tunic blouse, or I also have a lower neckline kind of wrap top, I've bought a nice simple black form fitting cardigan I will through over cheap solid color t-shirts, or a dress with leggings and the sweater which was a great go to in Europe. I add scarfs for color, and always have on at least a little make up anytime I leave the house I love the BB cream 1 tube and it's primer moisturizer and foundation blends in great I use a 16 hour eye shadow in neutral colors so I don't look sleep deprived (insomnia and homework) More cute ideas here:
http://www.chictopia.com/friedenlinde

SM with BM from hell's picture

I'm also a SAHM and my go to outfits are jeans, flats and a collar shirt. It's comfy enough to chase after kids in and I feel better knowing I look "put together". It's hard some days to focus on yourself. I've learned to pick my outfit the night before so I'm not rushing in the morning. Try Ann Taylor's for jeans, it's a bit pricey but they have plenty of sizes. I also have a thin waist but healthy posterior and they fit like a charm. Smile

bellladonna's picture

Thanks ladies! You all have inspired to wear real clothes today. I am out the door to pick up DD3 from school. I am wearing dark jeans, a collared shirt, I have on makeup, earrings, and a necklace. And I am wearing my hair down! LOL! I feel human today Smile Smile Smile

not2sureimsaneanymore's picture

I haven't showered in two days, covered in spit up and god knows what other excrements infants are known to produce. I'm in a giant button down shirt that fit when I was pregnant but now makes me look like a homeless person. I have on my maternity tights which probably is nearing it's fourth day of wear.

It's not that I don't have the time to get dressed up (or even basically getting clean), it's that I don't have the energy. Any downtime is devoted to resting before the baby wakes up.

My belly is flabby and loose, stretch marks all over the place, the dark line hasn't disappeared at all, and I think my bush is trying to overtake the territory north and south of it.

I don't have a mom uniform yet, unless you count what I mentioned above, but homeless crazy woman is not what I would like to go for so reading these help.

DaizyDuke's picture

My inspiration has ALWAYS been, you never know who you might run into while at the mall, grocery store etc.Hell I ran into BM one day at the Dr.'s office! So I ALWAYS and I mean ALWAYS try to look my best in public. I NEVER want to run into my ExH or BMs looking like shit. NEVER!

... and I'm proud to say that I have run across BM a total of 4 times over the past 6 years and every one of those times, SHE looked like the A.M. (Asshole Mess) I'm not even going to give her the "hot" lol making all those extra hours of doing my hair, makeup and putting on a decent outfit WELL worth it!

Unfortunately there are times that it can't be avoided, like Sunday I ran a 5K and then had to stop at the feed store on my way home. I made sure I left my race bib on so I had an excuse for being a hot mess. I guess I am vain but whatever. I'm going to rock it as long as I can!

myspoonistoobig's picture

Cute flats, skinny jeans and a henley tee (for some reason they seem more flattering than regular t-shirts). That's my Mom uniform.

Or, same thing waist down and then a tank top and a cardigan (both solid colors)

Tuff Noogies's picture

i work office/legal, which is funny cuz i HATE dressing up (for the most part, unless it's for DH!!)

most times at home i'm in PJ pants and a tank. but if i leave the house (like if one of the kids has a game or we all go out to the mall) i do the jeans, tee (almost always always v-neck and slim cut)and boots.

summer is decent shorts, tee or tank and flip flops. for tees and tanks i like the american-eagle type stuff, or anything cheap that looks of their style!

what i DO need to work on tho' is the hair and makeup. i hardly every wear any makeup, and the hair's usually in a bun. now THAT i gotta improve on...

loveandfitness's picture

I realized the same about myself a while back! As a stay at home mom if you don't want to feel like a slob but still be comfortable I found that sweatsuits (they have some great ones at new york n co) look put together enough while at home lounging. There are also yoga pants out there that fit well, look nice and don't make you feel like you're still in your pajamas, Athleta is great (ordered through ebay or another less expensive source)
For trips to the mall/store/etc. I agree with the above comments, cotton dresses that suit your body type are great or dark wash jeans paired with a simple jersey knit blouse or sweater along with a clean pair of tennis shoes. Comfortable and functional enough for quick trips, but fashionable enough to not feel like you have to hide in the corners of the store. I like the off the shoulder tee's through alloy. ( Although a teen fashion line there are quite a few blouses that i find appropriate and inexpensive.)