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Aaaaaaah! SS19 is back!?!

anothermom's picture

I've told SO that I do not want his son living here. you could read my other blogs to know why.SO has taken to just bring SS over without asking simply, because he knows I do not approve. I have been biting my tongue, but its getting hard.
Last, year I had a job at a school it was temporary as I was filling in for a maternity leave. I was constantly worried about what was going on in my home while I was away. This year I am babysitting in my home and the parents pay a pretty penny!Therefore, its very embarrassing to have SS19 on the couch sleeping when the kids arrive!
I've blogged before on how this home isn't big enough for SOs kids who are all adults to live here.This was something we(SO and I)discussed.At that time BM was "awesome" AKA she was a partier who was never home! (OSD was already shacked up as well as MSD) BM suddenly up and left leaving SS "homeless" without any life skills I.E high school dropout,carless,poor work ethic. If, he had a job he could of taken over BMs lease!Anyways......
I told SO, SS should "finish" sleeping in our bedroom. SO got pist! He said,"No, but he could go sleep in one of my BK's rooms." I replied,"No, he has stolen and deleted "important to them" info on their laptops!"(BK's now have passwords on ALL electronics,when SS told SO he came to me asking why) SO said,"Whatever" and left for work.
Now, I'm upset! This morning, I woke SS19 up at 8am telling him to go to my room and sleep my sitter kids arrive between 8:15 and 9:00. He said, "no,I don't want to move right now" after two sets of kids arrived he finally,went out to the breezeway! Its 1:15 he is still sleeping! I like to use the breezeway as an art room,but I guess not today!
Ive been looking for a home. I hate putting up with BULLSHIT! I've gotten feed back before, saying I should be the one to move out, but honestly it would be so easy for him to find a two bedroom. What the hell have I gotten into!?!

Comments

Disneyfan's picture

Did you move into his home or did he move into yours? If it's his home, there's no way he's going to kick his kid out(or make him stay gone) while your kids are there. Yeah, I know your kids are minors and aren't causing any problems, but that won't matter much to him.

If it's your home, tell SS to go. If dad objects, tell him he can go as well. If it's his home, then it's time to find a place of your own. Move quick before your parents start looking for other child care arrangements.

anothermom's picture

We are renting, jointly! The lease was up,and we are month to month now. We can go at anytime. Like, most on here Im the one who pays the rent and majority of everything else. I spoke to the landlord. He told me I could sign a new lease in my name only.
You, hit the nail on the head! I've been afraid of the parents being uncomfortable with SS

hereiam's picture

This would piss me off, even if I didn't have a business at home. Add the fact that he could be jeopardizing your business? HELL NO!

Not to mention how disrespectful this is by both your SS and your SO.

How can your SO be okay with his grown ass son lounging around on the couch all day?

My DH loves his daughter but he would not put up with that. He has worked hard all of his life and it pains him that his 24 year old daughter will not get a job and lives off of the system, instead. He tells her constantly that she needs to get a job. But, ya know, BM knows best. So, as far as I'm concerned, BM can take care of anything regarding SD that the government won't.

What is it with these lazy asses?

twoviewpoints's picture

Doesn't really matter how many of 'us' here agree with you aka what's happening in the home is wrong and shouldn't be tolerated. Bottom line is 'we' don't live with you and it's not 'us' who can correct the situation.

It's up to you, OP. Your SO nor his son don't give a rats behind how it should be or how you feel about it. Nope, not even if it's affecting your in-home business. You have several choices 1. You sign a new lease yourself promptly removing SS and SO, 2. You and your own kids find a new place of your own and hope your clientele follows your business, or 3. You accept it as it is because SO isn't sending the SS packing nor does he SS care what you want and will sleep where and for however long SS pleases.

There isn't any magic wand going to appear, wave itself over your SO's head and suddenly turn him instead this changed person who agrees with you, takes action and boots his kid. It isn't going to happen. Not all the foot stomping, bitch-fits, tears nor sweetly sugar sucking up on your part is going to change SO or his good for nothing kid. If anyone except you were worried about this 19yr old failure of a now man , he wouldn't be being bounced from house to house, relative to relative... they would have steered and motivated the kid long ago.

moeilijk's picture

I'm not sure if she has to evict him, or the landlord, or what. I agree it's more complicated than if she just moves. But moving is not exactly so straightforward either.

I suggest she talk to her landlord and/or the local cop shop and/or her local free legal help place (most larger cities have something) to find out what her best choices are.

I hope she does take action. I can see how the ways things are is just not going to work out for her.

IslandGal's picture

Bloody hell! I'd be so tempted to squirt that lazy ass wanker with a friggin' nerf gun!

Don't continue to put up with this. Neither your SO or SS appear to have any respect for you... so instead of allowing all that negativity in your life..get away from them.

Focus on finding yourself somewhere else to live and leave those 2 morons in the rearview mirror of your car as you head towards a better life.

Save yourself darl.