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Emotionally exhausted

Adviceneed1234's picture

Submitted by Adviceneed1234 on Sun, 03/04/2012 - 10:06pm

I have a SD9. She is so exhausting! If its one thing it's another. My husband says I'm picking on my SD but I think it's total disrespect from my SD. Ex. I asked her to put her plate away. I get no you do it. ( my husband tells me I need to pick my battles). I bought 2 dresses for SD to chose 1 for Easter. She liked both of them (amazing). I told her not to rip the tags off until she figured out which one she liked best, what does she do but rips off both tags!?!? The list goes on and on. Now I know kids have their moments and this doesn't sound like the worse thing in the world,but I can only handle doing things out of spite for so long. It Is to the point the first day we don't have my SD I just get in shut down mode and I don't want to do anything! Does anyone have any advice for not letting this get me to being wiped out from the actions of a 9 yr old?

Comments

no appreciation's picture

Submitted by no appreciation on Mon, 03/05/2012 - 7:31am

I have the same situation in our home. 35 year old SD with husband and baby. Appears very nice, but sneaky and manipulative. Comes to visit with husband and baby and stays for 7 hours (lives 20 minutes away) takes a nap; they lay all over the couch; ate us out of house and home; leave their garbage all over the place; my husband runs after the baby. When gets up from nap wants to know why no one changed the baby...OMG. Complains about her housing situation, probably so we help out AGAIN with financial assistance. I finally left at 6pm to go to a movie with friends and my poor husband was exhausted....but he lets it continue on for another 3 hours. I am so fed up and sick of being used. This is a 25 year old story and I am done. I notice I am pulling away slowly and I just don't want to have alot to do with the stepkid. I feel the same I put 75% effort and get nothing in return EVER. I am so tired of reading about "poor stepkids" I think poor "stepparents" really get a bad rap and no appreciation.

It is hell and unfortunately it is miserable part of my life that I am made to deal with. Always with a smile.....well I am officially done. My husband actually agreed with me this time, because I wasn't here to help him out.

Unfreakingreal's picture

Submitted by Unfreakingreal on Tue, 03/06/2012 - 1:17pm

My son is 14 and he STILL rips tags off before trying things on. It's the weirdest thing. They just don't get it do they?

Still Have Hope's picture

Submitted by Still Have Hope on Mon, 03/05/2012 - 7:08am

After SD ripped off tags on both dresses, I would have taken both back. I have returned things with tags off. Just take tags with you. If the store doesn't let you return or exchange (get something you want) them, donate or consign them. I would not buy gifts for anyone who disrespects me.

lac925's picture

Submitted by lac925 on Mon, 03/05/2012 - 6:06pm

I feel your pain as well - I have an SD8 (turning 9 this year, Lord help me!). Anyway, I don't take any of her shit. If she persists, I hand it over to FH - mind you, he doesn't take much shit from the her (or her brother) as it is! My SD8 LOVES to stall when FH asks the kids to clean up their mess. Our solution? LET her stall, then reward her BROTHER for listening and doing as he is told! Then the little princess gets all huffy when she doesn't get a treat as well LOL Concerning the Easter dress fiasco, I wouldn't have even given her a choice! Just pick one out yourself/yourselves and tell her that's the one she's getting. But yeah, you need to have your husband back you up on EVERYTHING concerning her or she WILL play sides and sad as it is, you'll be the one who loses Sad

Unfreakingreal's picture

Submitted by Unfreakingreal on Tue, 03/06/2012 - 1:21pm

I would have taken the plate and thrown it in the garbage. And even FASTER if it was HER plate, some Disney or Barbie crap or something. I won't ever let a kid disrespect me like that. Mine, his or anyones.