I have been disengaged from DH's kid (D 15) since the fall of 2008. I let her back into my life briefly a year later after her BM Uberskank became CP again. DH's kid ended up doing a rotten thing to both DH and I over the holidays of 2009. I fully disengaged at that point and haven't looked back. I don't like her, I don't love her, I don't give a crap one way or another.

"it's okay that she is sleeping on a floor and not bathing. As long as she is with her mother, everything is ok."

Yay, I can post blogs again :). I had this in the forum. But it was messing up for me.

First kind of pissed with SO and then proud of him for seeing! I made a huge, delicious chowder yesterday. SO and my boys just love my homemade soups, stews and chowders.

SS18's gf was here and we had SD10 for the night. I texted SO about dinner, wondering if he wanted the chowder or if skids were hoping for taco tuesday out.

SO and SS18's GF both texted me at the same time saying. "I want chowder!"

then it went south.

Text SO to me: Um, SD10 won't like that though.

So MAYBE, just maybe there might be a solution to the insanity. Some years ago, when I had just divorced I had TWO offers from my company, one in San Diego, and one in Tampa.

I'm really tired of the advice or comments about difficulties being to either disengage or leave. Neither of them solve anything and both are the easy way out. Why not put some work into something and have it come out better in the end? Is the point of this site to HELP or just to encourage eachother to QUIT? I knew my DH had kids when we got married, I didn't know what holy terrors SD15 would be, but I'm not stupid and I'm not blind. It's a challenge for sure, but it's overcomming challenges that builds relationships.

not really. I think she is having a really bad month (last month) but I also think that she brought it on herself. It started when I finally told her how I felt about her the 1st week of May. I told her that I didn't like her and asked her to stop txting me. (it was like the 3rd txt from her in a month, i ignored the first 2) BF says that she doesn't take rejection well, so I am sure that she started planning to get rid of me.

So there was a little dilemma with my SD. The bm said my SO would have to find someone to watch the skid next week, after school at 3 when she gets off the bus. The bm's bf usually watches her until the bm is done work, at her house, but the bf has to work next week.

SD15 is so horrible that DH has even said that if she wasn't his kid he wouldn't like her. But for some reason he expects me to?? I've done all that I can think of to build a relationship with this kid! I've let her do things that she wants and convinced DH of it for her, offered to buy her things and clothes, given her "girl" advice, gotten her cute hair cuts that she picked out, taken her to do things her dad never thought to do...and put more effort in to her than any of the other three kids! All the while she's cruel, disrespectful, and takes every nice thing and stabs me in the back.

DH talked to SS and told him he would spend 1500 on a used car and that BM would have to pay for gas and insurance. But then SS goes on a rant on how unfair it is that our BS got a nicer car. And then he says how his mother cannot afford anything. He called my husband a jerk who could not even look after him. That he had to live in a dump. How kids made fun of him at school because of the clothes he wore. That we would not let him take clothes we bought him home with him. Can you blame us? We would never see those clothes again.