Uh no, it doesn't mean anything. I mean that's like saying well, I was married to this guy at one point and we were on good enough terms to have sex and procreate, so there's no way the judge will issue and RO or the police will enforce it. If you inform her that she's trespassing and she refuses to leave call the cops and tell them. The cops won't give a rat's butt what terms you used to be on. They'll care that they've received a complaint and she's unwelcome on private property.

If she leaves when you tell her to, not much you can do in that moment. You can however document every time it happens and then file harassment charges.

Can you just not answer the door? I get the feeling that if you ignore her she will stop. Sounds like she wants attention.

Our BM is legally trespassed. Call cops, tell them you have asked her not to be on property and you would like her trespassed. It doesnt matter if SD lives there AS LONG AS you provide child for pick up and drop off. Simple as that. If she violates then the cops can arrest her.

my ex used to pull this shit with me all the time. show up out of nowhere with no notice and then refuse to leave when i told him to. it always took me being on the phone with the police for him to move his ass. the police told me since i have a child with him, they can't do anything, i would have to take him to court. so i got a restraining order against him. once he realized i was serious and was not going to tolerate that shit, he stopped. he was showing up with different gf's all the time, claiming he was there to see my daughter. it wasn't his time to visit her and he NEVER did actually take advantage of visitation rights. he just thought if he said he was there to see her (be it 8pm on a monday or 9am on a saturday,etc) then i had to let him in. NOT SO. he even showed up there once when i wasn't home, went and beat on my neighbors door and he did NOT know them, and parked his ass on their couch to "wait" for me with his gf and 2nd child he had with the 2nd person since we were divorced. he had no idea where i was or when i would be back! another time he showed up and my guy friend who was staying with me temporarily was home. he called me and told me "some guy is here wanting me to let him in to wait for you to get home and he says he's your husband". i had been divorced for about 3 years by then. i told him absolutely do not let him in and i'm on my way. the bastard left before i got there. i know damn well he said he was my dh because he thought my friend was my bf and he could mess up a relationship for me. fucking idiot. like someone is not going to know if i'm married or not.

anyway, it took going to court to get a restraining order to put a stop to this shit. i told the judge that all i wanted was to be left alone. that i was sick and tired of him showing up unannounced and uninvited and then refusing to leave. that if he wanted to see my daughter (he didn't, it was just a bullshit excuse to bother me and see what i had going on in my life) he had a visitation schedule and could not just show up whenever he felt like it. now that i've been with fdh for almost 8 years and ex knows i do not live alone at any time anymore, he hasn't tried a damn thing. he also does not know where i live as far as i know. maybe the letter i wrote him while he was in jail for not paying cs warning him that if he showed up we would not hesitate to defend our home as is our right, and that i know my rights much better now than i did before and that not only would he not get in my door but that he might leave my yard crawling with a bullet in his ass had something to do with it...

She has no right to show up at your house after you have asked her not to do so. This can be considered second degree stalking. Here's how it works in my state:

Stalking in the second degree. (1) A person commits the crime of stalking in the second degree if the person knowingly and maliciously:
Engages in a course of conduct that seriously alarms, annoys or harasses the victim and is such as would cause a reasonable person substantial emotional distress; or
(b) Engages in a course of conduct such as would cause a reasonable person to be in fear of death or physical injury, or in fear of the death or physical injury of a family or household member.
(2) As used in this section:
"Course of conduct" means repeated acts of nonconsensual contact involving the victim or a family or household member of the victim, provided however, that constitutionally protected activity is not included within the meaning of this definition.
(b) "Family or household member" means:
(i) A spouse or former spouse of the victim, a person who has a child in common with the victim regardless of whether they have been married, a person with whom the victim is cohabiting whether or not they have married or have held themselves out to be husband or wife, and persons related to the victim by blood, adoption or marriage; or
(ii) A person with whom the victim is or has been in a dating relationship, as defined in section 39-6303, Idaho Code; or
(iii) A person living in the same residence as the victim.
(c) "Nonconsensual contact" means any contact with the victim that is initiated or continued without the victim's consent, that is beyond the scope of the consent provided by the victim, or that is in disregard of the victim's expressed desire that the contact be avoided or discontinued. "Nonconsensual contact" includes, but is not limited to:
(i) Following the victim or maintaining surveillance, including by electronic means, on the victim;
(ii) Contacting the victim in a public place or on private property;
(iii) Appearing at the workplace or residence of the victim;
(iv) Entering onto or remaining on property owned, leased or occupied by the victim;
(v) Contacting the victim by telephone or causing the victim's telephone to ring repeatedly or continuously regardless of whether a conversation ensues;
(vi) Sending mail or electronic communications to the victim; or
(vii) Placing an object on, or delivering an object to, property owned, leased or occupied by the victim.
(d) "Victim" means a person who is the target of a course of conduct.
(3) Stalking in the second degree is punishable by imprisonment in the county jail for not more than one (1) year or by a fine of not more than one thousand dollars ($1,000), or by both such fine and imprisonment.

As you can see, if your BM was in my state she would be guilty of second degree stalking. We've actually had to cite this to DH's ex because she thought that she could just contact him however she wanted when ver she wanted. Not true. Once DH told her he only wanted email contact only, which was documented in an email to which she laughed off, she would be inviolation of non consensual contact if she did not follow his request. Emergencies with the kids were obviuosly the exception, but other then that she is required by law to follow DH's request. She stopped after that.

If your DH has shared custody and she is showing up during his visitation time unannounced after she has been told she is not allowed on your porperty by you, she is in violation of the law. You may want to google second degree stalking in your area and see if it's something similar to my state. If it is I would have no problem the next time she shows up handing her a printed copy of it with highlighted areas of where she is in violation of it. Now crazy people don't know that they are crazy so I would also call the police ask that they send an officer out to her location with a warning letting her know that she is unwelcome. Not only will that drive the point home for her but it will also be documented with your local police department so the next time she shows up you can call them again and again and again. With enough complaints filed you will then have the grounds for second degree stalking charges and a RO.

Oh and you may want to have your DH, or you can do it as well, send her an email stating how you want to be contacted. Obviously telling her that she is unwelcome on your property would be on that list. That way you have documentation that she has already been informed as to how you want contact from her which can be presented to the police with the first phone call if she violates it. When the police show up at her house to give her a warning, she won't be able to say that she had no clue that she wasn't supposed to be there because you'll have an email that predates you calling the police on her.

I have a similar question, actually, and I hope it's ok to ask here. We have 50 50 joing physical and legal and on our weeks BM has taken to coming to the school every day when school lets out to visit SS. It's not her week and she has no other business being there and it takes time away from us as I sit and wait. I don't feel like she should be there at all. She's more than welcome to call or drop things off if she contacts us but this is becoming a regularly thing. Is there anything that can be done?