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Get off of him

its.so.not.worth.it's picture

Okay so friday i about slapped the SD4. I was doing my normal friday cleaning. I was feeling nice so i didnt shut the kids in the room while i was cleaning. Well it got real quite and thats never a good sign when you have two 4 year olds and a 19 month old in the same room..lol
Well any ways i look around the corner and i see my little princess asleep and my BS4 trying to fall asleep. Now what i saw next is what made my mouth drop. The SD4 was trying to get on top of my BS4. While he is trying to keep her off of him he failed. This lil girl got on top of him face to face and started to move her body up and down grinding on top of him. In his sleep he pushed her off again and then she tried to do it again. Thats all i had to see before i went in and started in on her. As soon as she seen me come through the door she jumped off and grabbed her shirt and backed up to the wall. "So she knew what she was doing was wrong"
Well i got her alone and i tried asking her what she was doing and of course i didnt get a peep out of her. She started to push out a cry and some tears. So i just got more pissed. I called her dad and told him was going on and what she was trying to do, and all he could say was "well did you talk to her, and ask her where she seen that" and of course i came back with a smart ass comment. He once again told me that i have to talk to her real nice (like a baby).
Got off the phone with him and once again tried to ask her what she was doing and where she seen that at. This time i got the answers i was looking for only cause a used my little baby voice..(UGH kill me now) Well out of her mouth she said that she seen her mom doing that with Trey (the BM boy friend)
So i call my DH and told him, and what does he tell me. "Yeah, well i knew that. BM has told me that she has walked in on them a few times and has caught her watching them"
I thinking WTF!!! is going on over there at that house. How do you not know when your child gets up out of bed and goes to your room and you dont hear her. OMG!!!
Well i was told that if i bring it up to the BM that all she will do is blame it on us and tell us that is our fault. At this point i don't even want this child in my house let alone sharing a room with my other kids. She is at my house molesting my kids and some reason that okay cause she is a child. I DON'T THINK SO!!! she knew what she was doing and she knew it was wrong. So something needs to be done.
I just want to know what my next step should be if this happens again. And i pray to GOD that it dont happen again, but if it does what should i do. I just want her out. That was the last draw.

Comments

LilyBelle's picture

I doubt she would do that if she had only walked in on this once. She's seen videos or seen them do it, or is being molested.

She needs to be in therapy ASAP.

And, if the CO specifies no exposure to that (mine did)... notify the court.

smdh's picture

I would call child services and get it on record. I'd tell them what she said about seeing BM and say "I realize this happens, etc. but I can't have it spilling over into my home and need some guidance. Let them deal with it.

Anon2009's picture

My gut tells me she is being sexually abused and/or has seen someone else display that behavior. Dad needs to be asking her about what's going on, and should check out these links: http://parenting.families.com/blog/how-to-ask-a-child-if-theyve-been-sex...

http://www.rainn.org/get-information/types-of-sexual-assault/child-sexua...

He needs to get her into therapy and get an investigation started into putting whoever's responsible behind bars. DAD needs to be talking with BM about this and maybe place a phone call reporting her to CPS.

As for what you can do, teach your son how to appropriately behave. Consider seeking therapy for him. Also, if SO decides his child is being endangered and decides to go for full custody, you need to take a step back and analyze whether or not you should stay in a relationship with this man. You don't want this happening again to your son or any of your kids. Your first obligation is to protect them, and SO's first obligation is to protect and help SD.

Here are links on signs of sexual abuse in kids:

http://linburress.suite101.com/child-molestation-prevention-a46459

http://www.essortment.com/signs-sexual-abuse-39304.html

http://www.livestrong.com/article/210840-signs-of-sexual-abuse-in-3-to-5...

(You'll have to scroll down a lot on this site) http://www.helpguide.org/mental/child_abuse_physical_emotional_sexual_ne...

She might not display all of the signs. She might display very few of them. But it is apossibility still worth looking into, and SO should do so ASAP.

BabyDoll's picture

My DH told me that both of his boys did something very similar (to each other and other children) to the situation you described above. Now 12 years later, SS17 finally broke down and told us that he had been molested multiple times around the age of 5 and all while he was in his BM's care. SS17 has been in therapy since his parents divorced but he had never spoken about the incident because he was afraid of "losing" his mother.

It may be nothing or it may be something. Either way, get the child help.

RainbowsAndDaisies's picture

That girl has been abused. Kids don't mimic sex unless theyve seen someone doing it or had it done to them. She doesn't deserve your anger, she deserves a concerned adult who will take her to regular therapy appointments.