Yesterday wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. It was a little painful to watch as FDH had a wonderful time with his kids while I sat on the side lines. I pointed out to him later that not a single photo of me had been taken all day (mainly because I was behind the camera all day) and he wonders why I want a baby of my own.

And then there was BM who magically got FDH (from the boys) the same thing that I did. A photo calender. But half of the photos on the one that she made were old (from when they were together) or they were one that FDH had take after the split and shared with her. Not to brag but MINE was better it just degrades my effort in my mind.

Lastly and probably most importantly... FDH is freaking out and I am not sure what to think. Just days after FDH and I talked about it, I told him that we shouldn't play 'baby roulette' any more if I am planning for a fall wedding. To witch he agreed, we should do the wedding in the fall and then try for a baby after. Well my period came... 2 weeks early. My last one was on the 7th and then I started again on the 22nd. I know that is CAN be a sigh of pregnancy - AMONG other things. I am due for my yearly check up and the one from last year was 'abnormal' so I am not saying that it couldn't have to do with that too. Also I have had issues since I went off the shot in June. I may still be working it out of my system. I took a test and it was negative but it may have been too soon. This would just figure - finally we make up our minds and something happens.