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Am I nearing the end?

Mavis29's picture

Submitted by Mavis29 on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 4:10am

So after a good week with the SO, the SK come over on Tuesday. It's half term so it means my days off are spent with them intruding in my house. The first day was ok till the birthday meal and me being ignored but after a vent I calmed down. Day 2 went downhill fast, with him running all over the town for them. I wasn't in the best of moods due to the time of the month but kept myself to myself. On his return from once again running around fetching them from places I got my head bitten off by him for a silly comment and he has refused to acknowledge me since. I have spoken countless times to him about the way he speaks to me and treats me when his kids are here but he claims he doesn't act any different. I don't want to get involved because I just get left out and would rather be on my own alone than in their company lonely. His guilt parenting is annoying and the stress he gets from them all gets put at my doorstep.
Why can't he cope with having his kids and me at the same time, theyre his responsibility not mine so why should I have to do things for them when I get no thanks from them. I'm sick and tirednof the 3 to 4 day monster I have to put up with when the SK are here. I'm sure he wouldn't stand for it.
I love him and our time when they're not here but the constant attitude when they are is taking it's toll on me, I close to breaking it off for the sake of my sanity.

Comments

harleygirl's picture

Submitted by harleygirl on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 6:18am

I know exactly how you feel. I snapped last night. Not sure why just things have been piling up and I broke. I told him I cannot live with the BM constant disruption in our lives and her basically running our lives. I love ss4 he is good for the most part so far but I can already see the affects on him from her behavior and I feel like I have a long dark road ahead. I just told him I can't continue to live this way something has to give. He loves me dearly and of course doesn't want to lose me but is a man and not sure to proceed which I cannot decide for him.

My advice be honest with yourself and him. You do not want to stay in a situation that makes you unhappy and resentful and look back in 15 years and see what time you lost. Been there done that. Talk to him very seriously and decide what you two can live with.

chickendipper's picture

Submitted by chickendipper on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 7:45am

This is exactly how i feel. When they are at opur house EVERY weekend Friday to Sunday i feel like by the time they go home all he wants to do is sit on the sofa and catch up on telly and have a cuddle. when the SK are there he couldnt be less interested in me but as soon as they leave he cant get enough of me. Its like he feels guilty giving me attention infront of them ! im his wife and were expecting our first baby together, i would have thought something may have changed by now but it hasnt and we are arguing more and more about it these days. his kids are rude, arrogant, attention seeking and ignorant and i always tell him they are old enough at eight and eleven to make an effort ith me, if they are going to ignore me all the time im not going to make that effort anymore but he still sees them as babies that can do no wrong ! they play him like a fiddle and its soooo frustrating watching it happen ... i just dont know how things are going to be when the baby arrives, if he is going to over compensate with his 2 even more and leave our child out when they are around or if it will just be me that gets left out all the time again ! Its so hard cos i love him so much and when its just us 2 its perfect but as soon as they walk through that front door theres an instant seperation between us, me on my own and him and his 2 kids !