cant take it any more
ive been married to my husband for 2 yrs but have been in his kids lifes since the youngest was 4 she has always had anger issues which she is now 11. Her brother 13 and sister 15 are nothng like her I love them to death and I love her to but just cannot stand the arguing, lying, winging. She treats me and dad the same way she thinks she doesnt have to listen or do any chores if she gets in trouble she find excuses to come downstairs. She still throws fits like a 2 yr old They live with us full time so i get no break from this brat. I so want to slap her or send her to go live with her real mom but that would only hurt my husband. I want to get her help but my husband doesnt beleive in medicine. She blames us for her mom not being around and that we dont let her see her which is not true. Her RM lives in LA. only calls maybe 3 times a year. Doesnt call the kids on their bday but yet we give these kids everything but she thinks we dont love her and she says she doesnt want to live here. SHe is terrible in school. This morning she was trying to wear this pants that are way to small and short on her with stains. I told her to go change and ofocoarse she starts the arguing waking up my son (3mths old) so I grab her arm to get her attention and she pulls away from and ofcoarse my nail stratches her and she blames me that i stratched her on purpose Ive had to guide her up the stairs and she throws her self on the stairs and then says i pushed her. This morning I wanted to strangle her. I tell my husband and hell get on her butt but never is consistant with it. The other kids are so well behaved and ofcoarse have there moments but nothing like her. She is a good big sister to my son but she try to take over Im so ready for her to be gone ugh sometimes i feel like im a bad parent bc i want to beat the daylights out of her but im more of mother to her than her RM so tired of this
- so tired of this's blog
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It sounds like you have been
It sounds like you have been a really good mother to your SD11 under very trying conditions. I would suggest getting some advice from a behaviour therapist, or at least reading something like the "Supernanny" books, they are available on Amazon, and give really good advice on how to deal with this kind of difficult behaviour.
As you probably know, it is essential to be consistent, and your DH needs to get his head around this. At 11, she has to know you are the boss, you can't let her think she wins the battles, else imagine what she is going to be like at 14? Does she try and push her elder brother and sister around too? Unfortunately it seems to have become an ingrained way of behaving - she uses her anger to get her own way, and needs to learn, from your reactions, that this will NOT get her what she wants. Don't think (or allow the other family members to think) "oh, poor SD11, her real mother doesn't care, I must let her get away with stuff to make it up to her." Her elder brother and sister cope OK, and she can too, she just needs to be taught how.
o yes she knows i will not
o yes she knows i will not give in to "her way" thats way alot of times she will try to go to her daddy and when he turns her down she gets even more upset. Ive tried to treat them with respect and love but at the same time not to let them just get what they want w/o earning it but she seems to think it doesnt apply to her. Like this morning I made her change while i was still there and ofcoarse she gets smart with me and says these pants are short too (capri pants)