Here is my story. I married a wonderful man that has no biological children of his own. However, his first wife had a child that he raised and provided for the whole time they were together. If it hadn't been for his love and desire to be a good parent the child would not have had a good life. When we married, he agreed to do the same for my two children from a previous marriage. I have set back and watched over the years and we are both treated disrespectful. Basically the only time there is contact is on a birthday or holiday in which we provide gifts or if they want to borrow something we own. The first several years we were married there was no contact basically because he was getting married and happy and that was not acceptable for him but perfectly fine for the biological parents. However, i found it disprespectful that there was still contact with his other family and not the man that had been a true father. So, i made contact and got them back on speaking terms. I know in my heart it was the right thing to do. Since then two grandbabies have been born who i love dearly but it is very hard to have a relationship when you know that any moment things don't go the way of the stepchild that they are removed from your life. My husband will not stand up and put a stop to the way they act and it is setting a bad example for my two children whom i would never allow to treat him in this manner. I love him and he is a wonderful man with a big heart but this causes termoil in our relationship so i have decided to remove myself from the situation and if he wishes to continue to be used that is it his business. They have plenty of time for everyone else but not us unless we can be used. Most the time you never even get a thank you for anything you do. I was raised by a step father and i had far more love and respect for him! My husband just takes the crumbs and keeps on giving. It is so hard to watch the man you love being mistreating and i just can't take it anymore. So glad to see that i am not the only one dealing with the issue. It really does seem pointless to put so much energy into trying to having a relationship with someone who obviously does not want one with you. I guess he continues to give because if you don't then you lose all contact. But have you really lost anything?
It is always nice to be in the same church and they will walk right by and not speak. If husband is with me, he gets up and goes to them! Ugh!