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Spoiled kids..I just dont agree step kids or not!

newmom01's picture

Submitted by newmom01 on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 1:57pm

I know that we are living in a diffrent time now, but I too think that kids of a certain age should not have all of these high tech things! My ss 8 just got a new smart phone from BM of course! Because I would never allow DH to buy him one. BM tells DH its because he gets good grades!!!What a joke at that age that is what HE IS SUPPOSE TO DO! he still cant make his bed, brush his hair or teeth when he gets up, does not take out the trash, or wash dishes...these were the thing I had to do growing up called chores...oh yeah I told DH to show him how to pee again because when I went into my guest bath downstairs there was urine on the floor all around the toilet! ss's dont live with us they stay with BM but she buys them all this crap and they dont have any chores it is horrible since they are boys!!!! That wrong with half of our DH's nobody taught them how to scramble an egg, or start a load of clothes....sure Im a little old fashion calling these the wife duties, but when we need help they should be able to fill in...or you can scratch that and just simply say how will they take care of themselves at college or when they move out? I plan on teaching the two sons that we have together how to do a little yard work, empty trash, cook and clean and then reward them SOMETIME and very BIG on birthdays and christmas and not everytime some high tech gadget or game system comes out just because you got good grades! Thats not hard all you have to do is go to school thats what we expect! In this world nobody is going to give you ANYTHING! you have to earn it. And as little boys I feel that they should learn how to sweat sometime there is nothing wrong with raking leaves or cutting grass...My ss's hate to do chores and I feel like this is going to cripple them in life

Comments

moongirl1701's picture

Submitted by moongirl1701 on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 2:10pm

I totally agree with you. We are raising the entitlement generation, and it seems to be getting worse every year.
Now I sound like my grandmother did. Blum 3

snoopyinoz's picture

Submitted by snoopyinoz on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 2:47pm

My SD's feel the same way. one would think that we had asked the oldest one to run barefooted across glass when we ask her to do the dishes. Doing chores never killed any kid.

hismineandours's picture

Submitted by hismineandours on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 3:31pm

My kids, 9-13, all do chores. For free. I have offered to pay them at times when they do things above and beyond. The cell phone is not your problem. It is the parenting. My kids (the 13 and 12) have smart phones but they also do a buttload of chores. Both my ds12 and dd13 can cook a full supper, do their own laundry, scrub toilets, vaccuum, dust, etc. They also all are honor roll students. To me in order to have nice things they must first fufill their responsibilities at home and school.

My ss13 has no phone. we wont get him one as he makes F's and wont do his homework. He has no set chores here, but if it is something I ask him to do he will automatically refuse. So no privileges for him. He is rather bitter about it as well as completely clueless at to why the other children get these things and he doesnt-however it has been explained many times-he just doesnt care for the answer so he disregards it.

Still Have Hope's picture

Submitted by Still Have Hope on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 3:41pm

In our house kids do chores because they are part of the family. I explain to them, I cook dinner because I love you and want you to eat a nourishing meal. If you want a clean house to live, you have to help keep it that way. For our 10 and 12 year old that includes cleaning their rooms, vacuumimg, dusting, putting away laundry, taking out trash, loading & unloading dishwasher, weeding flower beds, picking vegetables from garden and sweeping floors, porches and patios.
As for allowance, we give them money so that they learn how to handle it - buying wisely, budgeting for planned expenses, saving for big purchases.
They are given the opportunity to earn extra money by doing extra chores that they normally aren't expected to do like cleaning out the garage,washing the cars or washing windows.
I came up with this system after watching my skids grow up with entitlement issues and never learning to take care of themselves or their surroundings. Do my kids always like it? No, but I am raising adults to contribute to the world not leeches to suck it dry.