Angry Ex Wife filed False police report!!!!
I have only been with my bf for less than 2 months. I love him soooo much. He has 2 beautiful kids. He is separated and in the middle of a divorce. She does not want a divorce. She is very adamant about how much money she should get from him. She uses his kids to manipulate him. He happens to be one of the few men who love his kids very much and is broken if he is not able to see them. It breaks my heart to see him that way. He tries to stay happy around me but I know how he feels. She fights to control him and uses GOD as her motivation! I believe in God but I would never use the lords name to justify evil actions.
To make matters worse, her daughter spent a weekend with her father and I was with them the entire time. To make a long story short, his ex filed a false police report that I touched her daughter!!!!! I am currently waiting to see if charges will be filed against me. One charge is worth a minimum of 25 years to life!!! How can someone be so wicked????? Can someone explain this? I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy (and I dont have enemies!)
I am lost for words. I am concerned for her daughter who has to endure an invasive examination by a doctor because of all of this. What will her mother subject her to next? He was forced to tell his ex that I am no longer in the picture so as a result she opened up communication with him again and he can see his kids again. I have been praying for her, her daughter, his son and myself.
I know where I want my relationship with him to go but this is a real test for us both. She is pretty much making him choose btwn me and his kids. Which really means choosing btwn her and me. This is so insane!!! He will need to be strong because after this attempt comes more , and more, and more attacks, accusations, whatever works for her! Anyone who takes these lengths you cannot under-estimate. I told him not to tell her about me but he was being naive and sweet (and maybe a little show off, who knows?) so he told her about me 1 month in. Then after that he allowed me to meet his daughter. Obviously this did not sit well with her and she decided to show her wrath.
Her soon to be ex-husband is divorcing her, he is happily moving on, her daughter loves the new girlfriend and she couldn’t find anything tangible to criticize so SHE CREATED ONE. PLEASE PRAY FOR ME.
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Don't walk, RUN! Sorry, I
Don't walk, RUN! Sorry, I know that's not what you want to hear, but if she is that crazy now, it will NOT get better. I know crazy BM was not that crazy at the begining and she just got progressively worse...so if she had started out that way, I would be out!
I agree with herewegoagain:
I agree with herewegoagain: been there, done that! I've been with my DH 6 years, married 3 and his XW is STILL pulling stunts like that!!! The worst part is that my SD 16 is emulating the behaviour and making her own accusations of neglect, etc... You can't fix crazy. Once the honeymoon period is over, how much longer will you be able to take it as the garbage continues? Unless you find a way to put a legal end to her antics, it will continue in different ways and you and SO will find yourselves in an unhealthy state of fear of both BM AND SD - why SD? Because the slightest thing she shares with her BM will be deliberately misinterpreted by BM to use against you. Unfortunately, a former friend of mine is doing the EXACT thing to her recently XH even though she threw him out saying he was a loser. This guy has been interrogated 3x by police on various FALSE criminal charges, and she's harrassed his GF who has now left him.
I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this, and as you say, it's concerning for the daughter to have to be used by BM. Even if you try to protect yourself by filing a deffamation counter-claim, it could act like gunpowder and lead to other unnecessary legal woes with the mental BM.
You are in my prayers.
JUST WOW!! What a mess. I
JUST WOW!! What a mess. I feel for you. I don’t post a lot and I try to not recommend running away, especially if someone is married and if they have been together a while. But you are neither.
RUN! First off, you barely know this man and it sounds like he may be recently separated. I am trying not to be rude here, but what on earth is he doing by letting a person he has only know two months, spend the weekend with his child?
Don’t’ get me wrong. BM is WRONG WRONG WRONG and should be in jail for filing a false report, but IMHO, you never should have stayed with him and his child that soon. If you stay, this will only get worse. You only have a small taste right now, (because you have only been in the picture for LESS than 2 months), but trust me. If she is already doing something this evil, it will get SOOOO much worse.
If you do choose to stay, knock off the weekend sleep overs when he has his child. Good luck.
Agreed! RUN girl
Agreed! RUN girl RUN!
Why?
Because sooner or later, the "love of your life" will TURN on YOU!!
The STBX wife will turn up the heat, turn the children against him and he will blame YOU.
Sounds impossible?? It's not! I too got with a man before he got divorced. He was so loving, so sweet, so caring for his children (btw most men love their children, i know you said one of the few. . .this in itself is a red flag; i'll explain)
He is such a loving, caring father. In other words kid centric. What usually happens is soon, the kids will start to edge you out with full egging on from their mom. Then biodad will be forced to choose between you or his children. Guess who will lose?
I used to think the man I'm with now would never yell at me, never hit me, never do anything unkind. He even said so as I had bad experiences with two marriages previous to this. He was the "love of my life" and would "restore my faith that there are good men out there."
HA!!!
Things turned on their head so fast it was unreal. Soon his children became his "mini-spouses." It's been eight years now next month. In that time, his now ex wife has totally turned all three children against him, surfacing only to manipulate for material goods, which we DON'T have b/c she takes over half his net salary. She's remarried but still is on the warpath and will never relinquish it.
The children have been completely spoiled and feral. NO discipline as it makes their parents feel guilty and mommy wants to win them over to "her side" by being their BFF.
What you said about "one of the few fathers that cares for his children" is a red flag in itself.
That's because he no doubt thinks "his case is DIFFERENT and he's "not like all those other deadbeat dads who walk away from their children" (TM)
This is a HUGE red flag. He's basically tellng you that when the divorce is through, he'll sacrifice EVERYTHING to kiss the children's backsides as they manipulate him into a death roll. Seeing them will be contingent on how much money he gives the BM and them. He will NOT stand up to the BM for fear of "losing" the children thusly he will refuse to parent traditionally (adults call the shots, children obey and respect)
And you will the sacrificial lamb and scapegoat.
RUN and find yourself a lovely CHILD FREE man!!
Run, Run, Run......but when
Run, Run, Run......but when do these ex-wives get set straight? When? There has to be a way. Forget about me....he will never be able to be with anyone. This woman has nothing personal towards me, she doesn't know me. She was offended by the position i held. I represented her failure and rejection. Not that it is my concern but when does he get to settle down and move on?
This is crazy. where is the crazy ex-wife blog? I need to visit them
That's the thing.. these
That's the thing.. these crazy psycho women usually NEVER get put in their place. Nearly everyone that has anything to do with the divorce/custody proceedings (court, judges, etc..) will be on her side, merely because she is a WOMAN. She will make your BF's life a living hell for as long as she can.
Never!!! Don't waste your
Never!!! Don't waste your time on wishful thinking, like I said, you can't fix crazy. My SDs' BM is getting re-married soon and her psycho babble STILL goes on. If her FDH is on this site with his own blog (I wouldn't be surprised), my only message to him is "RUUUUUUUN, Sir, run!!!"
^^^^ I agree with all of
^^^^ I agree with all of them. Get the h-e-doublehockeysticks out of there now!! This will only get worse for you!
Sweety-she's not even his
Sweety-she's not even his ex-wife, she's still his wife, lets start with that. YOUR mistake to get involved with a still married man (even if he's "divorcing")...NEVER EVER get involved with a married, seperated, or recently divorced man...that's rule number 1....it's ripe for disaster.
SHe's upset at the position you hold-which right now you are still a mistress as he's married.
Your bf's mistake-BIG ONE, moving on so quick w/out healing. Showing you off to the exwife in an attempt to get back at her and so soon-and introducing you and having you around your kids when you had only been together under 2 months.
THe disaster here is really with you and him mainly-exwife is inconsequential at this point. BIG mistakes-and you should walk away and vow to stay away from this kind of mess..if you go for a divorced man-better if he doesn't have kids or if he does that he's not a guilty daddy, hopefully has a son instead of a daughter, and an amicable/boundaries relationship w/his ex. AND that he's been divorced at least 2-3years.
Overit2 you have a very valid
Overit2 you have a very valid point. He wasn't divorced yet.
I do know that they were seperated and lived in 2 seperate homes long before I came in the picture. Also the divorce papers were sent to her long before I came in the pic as well. I know that to be true because I have heard her complaining that she wont sign them because she doesnt believe in divorce. She harrassed a different girl he dated before me until that didnt work out. I could have ran too but I saw something in him I liked. We had no plans to take our relationship to certain levels until the piece of paper was signed. To be honest I told him not to reveal our relationship to her until much later. But, he didnt like the idea of living 2 seperate lives (between me and the kids seperate occassions). She always controlled when he could see the kids so it was sparatic where he couldnt have a life outside of her. I advised against him telling her but he did! Oh well, whats done is done.
I honestly dont believe that if he waited 1 year, 2 yrs, 3yrs after the divorce to reveal my existence to her that she would have behaved any differently. That is my problem. I believe that the moment she realizes that another woman has taken her place and things become more real for her she would spaz anyway. I honestly believe that. I dont believe that divorce papers change her feelings or make it significantly less hurtful.
The money she was getting monthly was getting cut in half, her husband that took care of her every financial need was gone, she does NOT have a new partner and her daughter loves his new girlfriend. Things couldnt be worse for her. She has allowed hate and anger to drive her actions towards a woman she doesnt know. I cant see myself doing that. If anything my anger would be towards HIM entirely.
Overit2, I iunderstand your perspective though. I almost wish he was a jerk so that it would have been easier to walk away in the beginning. I see the need to walk away now. If he doesn't have the will power to stand up to this there is no need for me to be strong for him. Sad.....