Hard few days
My world changed so much 6 months ago. I just had a hysterectomy around the same time I was meeting my boyfriends son and were talking about living together. I met the son and we instantly hit it off. Within the first few weekends of being around each other he was saying he loved me. I was ecstatic. Things were going wonderfully except with the biological. At first she seemed normal, I wasn't about to trust her but I went into everything as I normally would. It's not about the past or any of the drama, it's about the boy. Well, I am typically a very mellow laid back individual, but the quickest thing to upset me is by not doing right by kids. He was in a 3t and she would send him in 18 and 24 mo clothes almost every weekend!!!! His personal area always was red and broke out when we would change him. We would get it cleared up and it would look that bad again. He would try to talk to her and it always led to a fight. She would say that he was being mean and over reacting and that she was a great mom. We have even took pictures!!! I'm not saying I am perfect or that she is all horrible but the bad def outweighs the good. It has gotten progressively worse as the relationship has continued. She has texted my fiancée saying how the 2 yr old was cussing and she couldnt help but laugh. How messed up is that? He will get in trouble for it at our place and he says well mommy let's me. We try to talk to her but nothing helps. He is now progressed to calling me names and her telling my man that I cannot correct him for baby talking or take him out in public places without her approval and all kinds of messed up rules now. I don't want to be nasty but it's obvious he's learning bad habits from her and her family since he doesn't go to a sitter or school yet, and I just don't what to do. Can anyone help me??
- Sarbrewe's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
The kid sounds like a typical
The kid sounds like a typical two year old. It's normal for kids that age to have clothes in various sizes. The redness could be a reaction to the type of soap or laundry detergent mom is using.
I agree with the above two
I agree with the above two comments, however the BM cannot tell you that you need her permission to take the boy out in public. When the boy is in your fiancee's care and control, she has no say about what goes on in your household. Hope there is a court order in place.
I agree with the others-I
I agree with the others-I dont see anything hugely abnormal about the situation.
You might want to consider that it's your behavior that's intiating the bm to "impose" all sorts of crazy rules. You said that thing were fine at first, but then you started noticing these issues and your man tried to talk to her about them. My guess is that he never addressed these issues before with bm-so she knows they are coming from you. Most bms dont appreciate someone else coming in and criticizing their parenting.
I woudl back off if I were you. Help your boyfriend take care of his son on his time and leave it at that.
^^^^^^^ this is so right
^^^^^^^ this is so right on!!!!!
Wow, I never even thought of
Wow, I never even thought of it that way. My fiancée never has really said much to her bc they tend to not agree on things. At first I did try to look from her side and tell him he could be nicer to her and lately I haven't been trying so. I immediately jump to the defense, because of how she is all the time criticizing me on things I do and is always breathing down lees neck. I could see how I have gotten too caught up in it all and making mountains out of molehills. I do want some suggestions on how to handle things since we do have him more often than not and he is working so it tends to fall back on me to handle things. I do not say anything about his mom and never would when he is around us. I try to be as nice as possible but I feel like I can't do anything without offending her and since I am the one who has him most the time I feel my hands are tied. Can you offer me some help?