I have mostly disengaged on the parenting stuff with SS12, but on Tuesday I did take him to Karate, since DH had taken my son to a BB game. Well SS got a stripe on his belt and was very proud of himself. He comments to me, can you imagine how good I could have done if I had gone last week. He is supposed to go every T and R. We pay for this. BM agrees to take him or we are just out the money...

I ask him why he didn't go either day and he tells me he was at the hospital all week with his Stepdad. They had to wear a yellow suit because he had an infection in his leg called MRSA....I was flabbergasted and he knew he had told me too much. He says "now you have to tell my Dad, right". I told him his mom put him at serious risk and he should have just come to our house. He said I know, but Mom won't even consider doing that. I said "Your Dad and I don't keep secrets, but let me think about this. I did mention that I was very familiar with the infection and I was worried about him being exposed to it and I was only concerned about his well-being. Changed subject and as we go along he drops another bomb on me. He said, "I figured out that the days when SD14 is meanest to me are the days that I am leaving for this house or the day I come back. She gets so mean and angry with me". I told him that he shouldn't have to put up with that. "Have you told your Mom?" He says she doesn't care. So I mention that you know if you decide you want to be with us M-F and with Mom on the weekends, your Dad can talk to the lawyers. There are many scenarios that may make you happier. Your Dad will do whatever you ask him. He says he knows, he just doesn't want to make his Mom mad. Ugh!!!

We go out for ice cream to celebrate and the whole time we are talking about his sister and how she is so angry since she left our house. I don't say alot except to say that she says we threw her out. He says she is lying, she wanted to leave. I said I know, but unfortunately, that is not what she believes anymore and we look like we treated her terribly. He says he doesn't understand what he problem is. He says she treats me bad when she is under a lot of stress. Sounds like BM is making that excuse again.

I wait up for DH and tell him all of this. He says there is nothing he can do until SS says he wants to live here. He agrees to talk with him this weekend. But, last time SS told me all of this, when DH tried to talk about it with him, he said it was no big deal. I am so conflicted, I have a kid telling me his sister is mean and abusive to him and there is nothing I can do about it. I am just the stepmom. I know in my heart the reason he tells me this stuff, is he knows I will tell his Dad and his Dad will help him. But, he won't. We have been arguing about this for three days now on and off, because I just don't feel he has done enough. At the very least, send the witch an email that this is going on in her house again. Last time he did, she sent SD to a therapist one time and it seemed to be better.

I did tell DH not to discuss the MRSA with SS, since it served no purpose other than I can't keep a secret and it does no good since DH won't confront BM about her reckless behavior. The kids did not need to visit this guy in the hospital, he wasn't dying....

I know I have some personal issues with this, because of my childhood, but this is wrong...I was physically abused by a strict father and I asked for help from several people and they never came through for me. So, I feel really bad for SS. I feel like I am letting him down. I told DH, that I should just stop talking to SS, since I can't do anything for him. DH, do you think I am making this stuff up? I have a feeling that SD14 is treating him terribly when the adults are not around. I know how manipulative she is when she was here. She is angry now and he is a small kid for his age and easy to push around. This was the same girl that when she was 11 made a girl eat Hot Sauce to sit at her table at lunch....My imagination over the way she must be making his feel for coming here, is in overdrive...

If anyone has any suggestions on what I can do, I am open to it. I did threaten DH last night, if he didn't send an email to BM about SD14, I would. He told me to pack my bags then. I told him to pack his, I would be happy to take the house. It is getting really ugly here. I just want him to have a backbone and say something to her.....

Right now, she has the final Modification agreement from the mediation two months ago still to sign. I know he doesn't want to rock the boat, but I think we are sacrificing SS in an effort to not upset BM.....