ss - you're 17...grow up!
SS17 refuses to talk about his college decision and DH doesnt' want to brng it up because it stresses his baby boy out....are you Fn kidding me???
I contacted a couple colleges a week or so back about information in ss's very limited area of interest in school. Wednesday night DH told me to just let SS17 figure out his future himself, he's been ungrateful and unappreciative and to just let him take control for a while of his future.
school information came yesterday that i had requested. Dh got up my ass about "i thought we decided to let him look into things' yes Dh but they dont deliver what you request on the very same day you requsted it...
DH said he'd just let the holidays go by without talking to ss about college or student loans or a new car, anything that might "put stress on him" poor sad little Fn kid. GROW UP!
why wouldn't DH or BM want to keep incouraging the kid to look into schools and loan info - because last i checked, neither of us (dh and i, BM and her DH)were ready to go write a check for tuition.
not my problem, i will keep my beverages stocked in the fridge and when this talk starts i will just retreat to my room with a bottle of something!
why is this bothering me when i've done so well since summer on not giving a shit about these kids?!?!?
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i'm trying to be his friend
i'm trying to be his friend in this, Dh has no idea how the college thing goes and BM is too lazy to help with anything but it just pisses me off when the kid wont' show any effort on his end and just short of DH agreeing to quit helping him i was ready to throw my hands in the air.
i vow to myself to quit helping him unless he specifically asks for help and presents me with what he's done on his own.
i was so proud of myself though for disengaging since learning of it this summer and so far this school year.
Dakotamom - since you have
Dakotamom - since you have helped raise SS you need to be a mom and not his friend - he just might need an adult to take him by the hand and guide him and since it appears that DH and BM are not going to do it if you want him out of the house then you need to take this bull by the horns and get him into a college - it is very daunting to try to do this when you have parents willing to help you but if you don't have that it becomes very scary. So unless you want a high school graduate living with you for the next 15 years I would suggest you get him into a college or stick a cattle prod up DH's ass to get him to help out!!! - lol
I had to do the same with
I had to do the same with SD20. Had to drag her to open houses and college tours. I must say that I knew that the only way to ensure she moved out was to get her to college, so all the effort was a little self-serving
I understand it. It is
I understand it. It is self-serving. If you don't get involved it sounds like he will live at home until his 30's. Get involved if necessary. Anything to get these kids to move out of the house.
i agree with all of you - i
i agree with all of you - i dont want him living with us. i just didnt know if by making him to go college was my dream for him and that i should step back and let him choose his own destiny. DH said if he wants to be a professional dishwasher at the pizza place to let him do it.
my fear is that he wants to go to college and he's stickinig around for his 14y/o gf.....posted earlier this week.
i'll see what develops the next couple weeks - but i see myself gaining control again because i dont think Dh or BM will.
perhaps the little darling is
perhaps the little darling is wanting to live at home and attend jr. college. you can't get into a college overnight. my daughter is a senior and she has hers picked out and gotten accepted.....so do most of her friends. her boyfriend didn't pick yet.
my older daughter did it like this as well.
now my ss17 just dropped out of high school. no one made him do anything and now he is a pothead loser with no job or education.
quit giving a crap, but let him know, when he graduates he either goes off to college or gets a place of his own and a job because this gravy train is over!!!