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Feel like DH is taking advantage and no matter how upset I get he won't change ...

Step21with1intheoven's picture

Submitted by Step21with1intheoven on Fri, 10/22/2010 - 6:44am

I'm new to this site and glad I found somewhere to vent,

I love my SD and my DH, they both see me as the mother figure in our house which can be lovely but at the same time annoying.

Tonight my DH is on the phone to his mate when he says I'll get my wife will drop me off then he asks for a lift to the pub for a drink with his mate, now I'm not at all bothered that he and his friend want to go for a drink after working all week but we have SD this weekend because DH agreed to swap weekends with BM to help BM out and now he's going out and leaving SD with me and did anyone even bother to see if this was going to be ok with me ?

NOPE.

So pissed off I feel like his friggen nanny/housewife how do I explain to this man that she is not my child nor my responsiblity and while I don't mind helping out and being a SM I seek a tiny ounce of respect THIS IS NOT MY MESS IT'S his so why does he feel like it is my job to share the load to suit him.

I'm pregnant, grumpy, sleepy and just want to relax after working in daycare all week but now i'm having to entertain SD9 who is great so I shouldn't complain my issue is not with SD or having to stay home as I had no plans other than a hot shower a movie and an early night but now I'm annoyed by his attitude.

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PoisonApples's picture

Submitted by PoisonApples on Fri, 10/22/2010 - 7:35am

You have ever right to be annoyed. Nobody likes being taken for granted.

AS for how to tell him, you know him better than we do. I'm a very direct person so when I have something to say I just pick a time and say it as calmly and rationally as I can.

I think I'd just set the stage by saying you're pregnant, your days are numbered until you'll have a baby to care for and you need to relax. I'd tell him that you don't mind watching SD but that you should have a CHOICE and when the choice is taken from you and it's assumed that you will do it that it causes you frustration.

Chances are he's clueless. He probably just assumed you wouldn't mind so if you tell him that - that if he asks you'll rarely say no but that it makes you feel better just knowing that you have the option to say, he'll probably cop on and be more considerate - till he forgets again, men being the way they are.