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My Life

wriggsy's picture

This is my life in a nutshell. I am a mom...first and foremost. My only bio child is a daughter who is going to be 14 in a few months. I am a wife...finally married my sweet, naive DH in March after dating for almost 10 years. I am a step mom to SD who will also be 14 in a few months and SS who will be 12 next month. Although BD and I spend a lot of time there, we do not live in DH house (too small, skid issues). BD and I have our own house in the next little town with a cat and a dog living with us. Both DH and I work for the local electric company...I have been here for almost 12 years and he has been here almost 28 years. My exH is military-he and his wife live 5 hours away, so we don't deal with eachother regularly...and I never really speak to him anymore, I deal with my daughters SM...who is really wonderful! My DH exW lives minutes away from him and stirs the shit regularly. Their kids are both adopted.

The three kids are all VASTLY different from eachother. The two girls are only days apart, but cut from completely different material. From looks, to hobbies, likes, dislikes, school...they are total opposites! SD is tall, somewhat overweight, dark hair, dark eyes, dark skin (halfwhite/half mexican heritage). BD is more like her dad, average weight, height, with hazel eyes and blondish hair. SD hates school and it reflects in her laziness and grades, BD isn't crazy about school, but applies herself (almost to overkill) and it also reflects in her grades. SD would spend her life in her room watching tv and sleeping, but BD wants to be outside playing. SS and BD are more alike, but still their own people! SD and SS (both adopted) share the same birth mother, but have different birth fathers, but both are half white/half mexican heritage.

DH and I daydream about the day that we have a kid free house that we can run around naked in...hee hee!!!!

Comments

dakotamom's picture

can i ask how being married living in different houses works....i cant imagine having issues with the skids so difficult that i couldnt be with DH.
go get your dream house!!! Naked days are my favorite when the skids aren't around!! naughty naughty!

wriggsy's picture

I honestly believe that having separate houses is what has kept me sane this long. Some people close to me think it's a way to get out of having to deal with a situation that I don't want to deal with, and that's fine, too. Fact is, SD can be a horribly mean person and has no compunction to lying her ass off to get me in trouble. DH...as much as I love him...hangs me out to dry when it gets too hairy. I also do it to save my parenting style. I can't teach my daughter to be a certain way when her stepsibs are getting away with everything under the sun. My daughter can be a pain in the ass, too, but I can bust her butt when I need to.

We will eventually move in together, just not in any real hurry at this point. DH owns his home and it's in a nice neighborhood, so we really don't want to move. We are talking about adding on a bedroom/bathroom for us downstairs and let the kids have the upstairs...but we shall see how it all works out.

I absolutely love my husband and can't imagine life without him...this is why I married him..even though his kids make me hyperventilate! I don't know if I am too weak of a person, or too stubborn myself, or what, but I really can't handle it when the skids start acting crazy....so, I love going to my house and enjoying a quiet evening.

mommylove's picture

You are living in my DREAM marriage! Not living with my H would probably help solve 75-90% of the problems in our step situation - at least from MY perspective!

wriggsy's picture

Yep...just like McDonalds...."I'm Loving It!!"

Jsmom's picture

I totally get the different houses. Wish we had done it. I still have my house rented out. Don't want to get rid of it. If SD14 moves back in my plan is to move out so that they can't blame me when the situation crashes and burns.

dakotamom's picture

a friend of mine has her own house and her bf has his own. he has 2 skids she doesn't get along with so she stays at her house with her BS and he is at his house with his 2 dd. they lived together at one point for a month but it was too much for her to take so she and her ds moved out. it seems crazy to me, but i think i would do the same thing if the skids were with my DH permanently. it would drive me INSANE!!!!! i dont' like them when it's weekends only - i about want to die during the summer when they're there all the time....wonder what my area has for summer rentals....hmmmmmm
it's so nice to get away from the bullshit baggage skids bring with them.
thinking about this....im almost a little jealous....

HeatherM's picture

Different houses...oh what a dream... that's all I have to say.. made me remember the good ole days when DH and I were only dating and I had my own immaculate, modern condo... ho hummm .. I guess I can dream!

dakotamom's picture

different houses....what if there was like in prior times...the main house - DH and the DW together in harmony and living in the servant quarters the skids??? that's my dream.......
maybe the cinderella story wasnt' all bad thinking???