fed up with sd
am married with older woman who has 25 yr old daughter living with us. the wife owns house so I live with them. problem is I work nights but feel uncomfortable staying at the house alone with wifes adult daughter. I don't speak to the daughter as shes been very rude and disrespectful to me and the wife in the past. I have often moved out but wife always begs me to come back. ive only known sd from when they were 18, so I only see them as an adult woman. she used to bring horrible men friends round and start having sex loudly in our home and I warned wife that if behaviour continues I can longer live there. sd seems to show no sign of wanting to move out and I hate to have to live with wife and another grown woman. when I come home I have to lock my self in the bedroom as I feel crept out by the daughter. with the wife working days and me nights I don't feel appropriate staying at wifes house with another grown woman who often stalks me in the house and and has very predatory look when im alone. I wont go near them till wife gets back so I have to stay locked in the bedroom.
Yup, you keep doing the same
Yup, you keep doing the same thing expecting different results.
I think it is time for you to
I think it is time for you to sit and talk to your wife and for you both together find out what is going to work for you both. I would not like it is my daughter brought men home and had sex with them in our home and I don't know why your wife feels this is okay. She is an adult and needs to find a way to be on her own. Perhaps the two of you can sit with the SD and help her to take steps to that realization.
Time to give the bride
Time to give the bride clarity. Tell her next time you leave that it will be because yet again that she put her daughter over the marriage and that if you leave you will not be back until she affirmatively and assertively deals with her daughter once and for all.
Than follow through. Your DW knows she has you by the balls and that you will cave in yet again.
So, don't cave in.
Take care of yourself.
the wife does really love me.
the wife does really love me. but she doesn't want to throw daughter out on the streets. I don't have any guilt issues as she was very rude to me at the beginning. she was even racist to me with her boyfriends in our home[ im Mexican ] while theyre white anglo. she,d try to intimidate me with her thugish boyfriend but when the young man saw me working out with weights In the shed he could see I was a tough little guy so he backed off. last year I was angry to see hate texts sent to my wifes phone from sd saying its her fault im here, what was I doing there, that I was a weirdo and that sd hate me. I don't speak to people who hate me espeacaly behind my back. so I completely don't speak to them. ive had years of constant disrespect and belittling. they used to throw loud parties and turn our home into a night club. I think they may hate me because im religious [ catholic ] and wont speak to them in an inappropriate way. they fancy themselves as a little rude girl. as I said the wife does love me, she told her im there because she loves me and treats me really well. she gets manipulated by sd that shes planning to get her own place but shes been doing over 5 years and lost her job last year. I have no problem getting my own place but it doesn't seem right wife give her paid for house to her daughter while we have to pay rent. we may want our own children in our old age. im 35 so thers only 10 years between me and sd. it doesn't seem natural to me she would want to live there with us in such an unnatural way. I moved out of parents when I was 19.
Okay so the way i see it, you
Okay so the way i see it, you can go the high road( which it seems like you have tried) and leave but it does sound like you and your wife love each other and it sucks that SD is the issue.
Or }:) since she has made you so uncomfortable for so long, Its your wife's home there for yours and take your house back. Man up and by that i mean do all the gross things men do that makes us girls say EWW!!. lol Make her feel uncomfortable and maybe she will hide in her room or move out.
Ladies lets give him some ideas: (what do men do that make you go EWW and avoid them?)
Scratch your balls while sitting in living room in your underwear ( or none at all lol), Fart and burp alot, take Massive dumps and dont spray and then warn her DO NOT GO In There!, ummm Leave curley hairs on the soap or Loofahs..ha ha.. you get what Im saying, just dont do it when your wife is home and when SD complains but your wife doesn't see it she will thinks shes crazy and hopefully she will grow a pair and tell her if she doesn't like it she can leave shes a grown ass adult.
Dude, you're a hottie in the
Dude, you're a hottie in the prime of life. Don't live like this. Any child you have with this woman will have that awful girl as a sister. Really?!
Tell your wife you just realized you don't have to live like this. Love is not locking yourself in one room of the house and being insulted when you dare leave it. There are soooooooo many young women who would love to have you and they've got no kids yet. Tell your wife your life changes as of today or you are gone. Daughter must move out.
She won't, so start making plans and don't just move out, divorce. You only get one life. Don't torture it like this. You can love again. I promise. And when you are master of your house with a loving wife and a couple kiddies of your own who adore you and nobody is locked in anywhere and no insults to be heard anywhere you will wonder, why did I waste all that time???
Your wife does NOT love you
Your wife does NOT love you or she would not tolerate your being treated so poorly.
Words are meaningless. Actions tell all.
I will have to move out if
I will have to move out if things don't change. im not there for the the house anyway but for the wife. iv often stayed away anyway so as to eascape being trapped. when I lock myself in the bedroom all day I feel like the woman trapped in the car in the film cuju with a relentless mad predator obsessed with you that just wont go away. trouble is shes never seen me as a step father but more as another man in the home, and as I would only relate to her as a step father, she didn't like it. I suppose hell has no fury as a woman scorned. but I love my wife and im only there for her and no one else [ God forbid for her adult daughter ]. wife tells me that one thing is at least she can trust me, but that's not the point, in a marriage two is company, three is a crowd. anyway I probably will move out and just wait and see if things change.
She can trust you. How nice
She can trust you. How nice for her. Now can you trust her? The answer is a big, fat no. She is not looking out for your well-being.
please don't slag off wife as
please don't slag off wife as I love them. its the devils daughter that's the problem not the wife.