Advice
I am involved with a woman and she has kids. I love them all very much. MY woman's ex husband is a narcissist. I am having all kinds of issues with the things he dose. Let me give you an example. Dad has the kids the day before we leave on a driving vacation. He tells the kids that they will die from eating out. Mind you the kids are young, 10 and 8. Dad tells the kids that the only reason they can go on vacation is because he pays for everything. Truth he dose pay support at a rate of 600 a month total. Vacation starts, kids fear eating because they might die. Kids don't want to do anything because it cost daddy money. Each time she attempts to speak with him about what he is telling the kids he just says she is over reacting. He will then make several demands and if each demand is not responded to he will make threats of taking her to court. This man has spent years crushing every ounce of self respect out of my woman. He knows exactly how to make her feel like she has no choice but to do everything he wishes. I spend days making her feel better and that she is something great. I don't mind doing that because she is wonderful. I want to smash this guys face in but I don't want to have him retaliate or hurt the kids by hurting him.
- Bobby O's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
No you don't get to smash
No you don't get to smash Dad's face in, but what you can do is advise your lady to just let the jerk take her to court. She can't live her life in fear over a threat.
What's happening in your situation is no different than what many biological mothers put the birth fathers through. Snap and Papa jumps for fear BM won't let him see the kids anymore. In your case, Dad isn't going to be able to ban Mom from her kids nor will a judge award Dad custody because Mom took them out to eat.
Therapy for the kids might be beneficial to the kids. It could help the children understand and teach them coping skills. They're kids being put in the of a dysfunctional bitter father. They have a hard time when a parent like their father bad mouths the opposite parent and demands their loyalty.
Unfortunately for you, Dad's a long way from being done making Mom, the children and perhaps especially you miserable.
I convinced her once to stand
I convinced her once to stand up to him and refuse his demands. She use to face time her kids when he had them (50/50 custody) Once she stood up to him he refused to allow them to Face time her or text her. Now she is limited to 5 min conversation. The kids asked to go to counseling so she spoke to him about it. He refused saying they didn't need it. Since its 50/50 they both must agree. After going to visit him now they say they don't need it. The little girl (8) when she comes home from his place reverts to baby talk. She dose this often when stressed out.
Document everything. I know
Document everything. I know it's a pain in the rear but if you want to help her then write down everything because he will drag both of go to court...eventually and all you have is the document to back you up. He's trying to brainwash his children right now and will use that to hurt their mother but if there's anything to prove that's what he's been doing you need to write what he did, how the kids act before they come to him then after they come back from him, what you guys want to do for the kids and what he refused and how many times you tried to talk to him...etc. Print out all of his emails and save them too. Be careful what to say/email him because he won't stop of at anything to get back to your lady. That guy sounds like a psychopath to me.
Best of luck.
A.
I know God won't give me anything I can't handle. I just wish he didn't trust me so much. Mother Teresa.
Todays harassment. End of
Todays harassment.
End of school year last year the school sent out request for parent recommendations on their kids next teacher. They both received this letter. She who works at the school responded. He did not. today he emails her telling her that she violated the divorce agreement but making recommendations with out consulting him first. He proceeds to demand to know who and why she recommended. He goes on to threatens to call the school and speak to her boss to see what involvement she has at the school. he threatens to take her to court for the violation and threatens to have her fired if she works in any class their kids are in or any class his new kids are in. She is in total panic mode thinking she will be taking to court and loose her job. This guy will not give her a days rest. every day he finds something to threaten her about or something he will tell his kids just to hurt her.
She is not in contempt of the
She is not in contempt of the CO. They both received letters ad the chance to have input. It was a recommendation, not a decision making event. He chose not to give any recommendation. She is not required to consult and/or agree on giving an option... because in the end the school can and will assign the student to which classroom and teacher the school deems appropriate.
Most schools will not assign a student to a parent if one or both of them are teachers or even to a classroom where the parent is assigned as a teacher's aide. However if Mom is a rotating position (such as moves around where needed, assist with lunchroom, recess or different group activities) the ex is stupid if the school administration is going to bend demands. If the ex is calling the school and telling lies about Mom, she needs to address this with her supervisors so they know what is going on. She should also be getting this all down in email fashion or voicemail so she can pursue harassment charges or a possibility of a restraining order against the jerk.
He's being a bully. She needs
He's being a bully. She needs to stand up to him. Most importantly, she needs to keep any threatening emails, texts. And see a lawyer about nailing down the CO...then, get him for contempt every time he violates it.
He is a freaking adult. He chose not to fill out the paperwork, that's on him. She should advise her supervisor of the situation and tell the asswioe, go ahead and I will only be communicating via email or text regarding the kids only.
Ignore the whore ( the whore
Ignore the whore ( the whore is male here).