Haven't read the whole blog yet but I have to say dating a man with kids long distance is probably the best way to do it!

I know where you're coming from, even with not being long distance. Before BF and I moved in together I was only around his children EOW, even though he had them during the week some. So seeing them EOW felt like I had to get reaquainted. It was awkward each weekend in the beginning, but gradually warmed up, then the same cycle the next time.

I will say that it's completely different when you actually move in. Even with me staying with BF while he had his children, it wasn't at all the same as us all actually living together. It was alot harder than I thought it would be, but things do take time to settle in....there's great progress, but we've been living together for a little over a year and we are all still adjusting.

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“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.”

There are several ladies on here who gave up their "lives", quit their jobs and moved far away from their friends and family to be with a bf only to find out that living with his kids (even part time) really was way worse than dealing with his kids eowe while doing long-distance. Before you make this leap, I suggest a heart-to-heart on your expectations (discipline, time alone, how you fit in as part of the family, how his kids will treat (even though you get along now, moving in will make a difference) and his expectations (will you be baby-sitting).

The last thing you want is to get there, get married and find out that you take a backseat to his kids 10-15 days a month (even though he may have 4-6 days a month now, this may change) and that his kids have no rules, no chores, no respect and there isn't a damn thing you can do to change it and he tells you "tough, they're my kids and they come first". And you can't leave because you have no job and no where to go.

"God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy" and you can't change crazy!!

I absolutely have. I met my BF when he and his wife recently decided to divorce. we lived 1,000 miles away from her and their 2 kids.

I fell madly in love, BF said he wanted to move closer to his kids and I agreed to go with him because I was so in love.

The result= MASSIVE MISERABLE DISASTER!

I have no children of my own. I have always been responsible, graduated college, had a good job. I require a lot of sleep and didn't know that when skids came in and woke us up every Saturday morning at 6:45 a.m. that my boyfriend was able to sleep right though it while they bugged the shit out of me.

We had skids 1st weekend we moved. I was like, "Ok i might be able to deal with this every other weekend." The next weekend BM called to find out when to drop them off, OH WAIT, BF FORGOT THAT HE CHANGED THE DIVORCE DECREE SO HE COULD HAVE THEM EVERY WEEKEND THINKING THAT WOULD MEAN LeSS Child Support (which it didn't)!!!!!!!!! WTF!!!!!!

Needless to say, I have been miserable ever since. I dread every Fri-Sun. I basically hate my life.

I like kids, and I wanted BF to be happy by being closer to them.

But I didn't know that he would be a guilty parent, not disciplin well, babied them, would allow them to argue with him about anything they were told no about.

I didn't know that BM would call him 5-6 times a week while he was at work once he moved back. I also did not know how BM was and that we would live in a shit hole while we both worked our asses off 5-6 days a week to make it, pay CS every month, and feed the skids EVERY WEEKEND, while she lived in a very nice apartment and only worked 2 days a week and had EVERY FUCKING WEEKNED to have a life, when we did not.

I always took care of BF, cleaned and did his laundry, but I did not know that when he brought his kids over EVERY WEEKEND, that he would never clean up after them and would allow them to drink up all the juice, milk , ect that I bought because BF was broke, because they never wanted water and BF allowed them to drink this shit all day long, when I should have at least gotten 2 glasses out of it.