Not sure exactly what could have caused the shift in their behavior. Once you pinpoint the exact issue, you can begin to work on that and go back to the way things were. Any ideas on what may have happened??

"Venting without the desire to look within and improve your situation is simply venting to hear yourself bitch."

..."I'm not mean, you're just a sissy."

Stay the course, if the ss asks for no hugs and kisses respect that because I don't think it will help to force it and some kids just get squeamish about that around that age anyways but otherwise keep being who you are. It definitely sounds like something is going on. Has your dh had a heart to heart with them about what is up?

Are you sure that BM isn't projecting her own fears here? If your SS hasn't seemed uncomfortable, and suddenly you are getting word from BM he is, then i'd be suspicious that this isn't entirely his feelings. I think that you and his dad should sit down with him and have a talk about it. Or if you are uncomfortable, just his dad and him. Sometimes kids aren't quite sure how to articulate themselves, so it takes some patience and time to understand their intent.