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Don't want to interact with my stepkids

NadiaPatrice's picture

I am not sure if I am just feeling this way about my Step children becuae they come over every weekend or if it is because their father (my husband) does not interact with them like he should. I am at the point now that I don't want them coming over anymore until they learn manners and respect for my home. They are sloppy, they are rude and they do not speak to me unless they are hungry. I bend over backwards for them and do things for them that their own parents do not do. I am tired of it and their dad doesn't see a problem. When I step in a say something, they will agree and say they are sorry for whatever it is and turn right around and do it again.

When we hang out or play board games together we have a good time but then my kindness is taken for weakness when I come downstairs and the dishes aren't done or I look in the basement and its trashed! How do I turn off nice step-mom and turn on disciplinarian? How do I get dad to support me in this manner?

Comments

DaizyDuke's picture

How do I turn off nice step-mom and turn on disciplinarian?

You don't! You get your DH on board to be a parent! HE is the one who is responsible for making them clean up their messes, HE is the one who is responsible for making them behave and be respectful. HE is their PARENT! You can't care more than the parent does, if you do, you are fighting a losing battle.

WTF...REALLY's picture

A great book for parenting is "How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk"

Give it to your lazy ass husband to read. He needs to become a better parent.

As far as how to have your step kids treat you with love and respect, beats the hell out of me.

jstorie's picture

Stop bending over backwards before you drive yourself crazy. let dad handle it. eventually you walking away from that and forcing dh to put up with it.IT VERY HARD. just go out...go to walmart. go get a ice cream a pedicure. just walk away. been doing it for 3 months and my husband is finally feeling the pressure!

Drac0's picture

To be honest, I am not sure. I have been trying to talk to DW about getting my SS to do age-appropriate chores for years now and he's with us most of the time.

Every now and then my wife laments over how there is SOOOOO much work to do around the house. I tell her "Honey, we have a teenager with working limbs and a heartbeat living with us, so here's a thought. HOW ABOUT MAKING HIM DO CHORES!?!?"

*crickets*