Shy???? Seriously??
Forums:
I need some honest advice.
I am scared to death about the number of things that my husband does for his adult daughter because she is "too shy".
SD is 22, and my husband just took her to the doctor because her face was swollen. He even went in the exam room with her. This was after he worked a 12-hour shift at work.
He goes with her for oil changes and haircuts. Anything where his daughter would have to speak with a stranger. His excuse is that she is too shy. He certainly isnt helping her by not having her face these simple tasks on her own.
I was brought up to take care of myself from age 18 so this is completely odd to me.
Am i being over sensitive about this? How do i discuss with DH?
no, she has never been
no, she has never been evaluated or treated. That is a good thought. would we start with the family doctor or psychologist? I didn't realize this what is a condition that a doctor could help with. thank you
That doesn't sound normal. I
That doesn't sound normal. I agree she should be seen by a professional. I'm a shy person myself, but I could easily do things like you mentioned at that age.
Social anxiety is a real
Social anxiety is a real thing, but at this point your DH is enabling it and encouraging her to stay socially crippled.
How is a 22 yo woman who can't get a haircut or see a doctor supposed to HAVE A JOB?????
Prime example of
Prime example of codependency. If you talk to DH about it it will be perceived as an attack on his helpless shy daughter. Get some counseling for yourself to deal with this issue then invite DH along. Maybe an outside voice of reason could help him see how he's enabling and crippling his daughter. I'm dealing with a similar issue with a 30 yr old stepson. Counseling helped me see it was not me and gave me tools to disengage from their dysfunctional tango.
Is she really mentally ill or
Is she really mentally ill or is she just manipulative. My SD loves to play the helpless female card even though she was married for 12 years and divorced for 3 more.
She used to call her dad for every little thing around her house. She wants him to go with her to Menards. That's her latest ploy to get him out of our house and over to hers. She creeps me out at how she wants to act like his girlfriend or a child instead of a grownup woman living on her own and responsible for herself.
Grownup women with homes of their own don't need a daddy to choose a bag of topsoil with them, they have yard boys working there for that!
Another oddball request. DH and I were going to visit his sister-in-law in the hospital and SD asks to go with us, drive clear across the city to where SD works so that she could "follow" us to the hospital. She has a GPS for goodness sakes, that WE bought her. It would have meant an extra hour of driving time for us, but I put my foot down and answered the phone and told her flat out we would see her over there.
No personal escort from us!
Sometimes the drama is just so over-the-top.