How do we do this!!!!
I am brand new to this blog thing, but relieved to know that I am not alone. I have been a SM for 6 years now and still running into sooooo many problems. I have two SKids, boy age 15 and girl 17, my girl thinks that she is transgender which is no problem but I can't help but to wonder if it is a poor me, my life is so difficult because I'm transgender; but look if she gets picked on it actually gets taken care of because it is a 'hate crime'. I have not problems with this part except that she still acts so much like a girl. Majority of the time I feel like I am the person in the wrong because I am a very young SM (I'm only 26), but then I look back at the situation or the argument and realize I'm not in the wrong my SD has NO RESPECT for anybody!!! I am so sick and tired of feeling like I am the bad guy because I work full time, going to college full time, and I am an active Navy Reservists while still taking care of ALL of the house chores, making sure there is food on the table, and that both SKids don't need or want for anything. When is enough enough... when I try to talk to my hubby he shuts down or plays the good guy, WTF!!!! How do you get the point across to a man who didn't grow up with a family that he needs to take responsibility for HIS OWN kids!!! It's not really him that I am so upset with.
My freakin SD this morning decided to tell me that I was REAL MATURE because I closed the door so I could get dressed after telling both kids that they needed to be at their bus stop 5 minutes early because they missed the bus 3 times this week. I told her to shut up because I was closing the door to get ready to take them to school and I didn't want to argue first thing in the morning. So what does this little bitch decide to do, call her mother who lives 45 minutes away! Her mother then lights up my husband telling him I was in my daughters face screaming and yelling and slammed the door, I told my hubby I could show her what screaming and yelling in her face is actually like! I'm prior Navy and have been yelled at by about 5 inches, 7 to 8 feet away is not in your face!!
I just feel so lost sometimes because I am doing my best to be the best step mom but I am sick and tired of disrespect, really really hoping when both kids turn 18 they get the hell out of my house!!
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Comments
Oh my! You do have your
Oh my! You do have your hands full!
Your DH needs to put a stop to your step kids mom meddling in your household.
Is your DH supportive of you? You can't always bank on the kids leaving when they're 18 so best your DH spell that out on what is expected.
I do have one litte suggestion... instead of saying "shut up", use the words "be quiet". Same meaning but enough difference so no one should get overly upset.
I wish you the best!
Thank you all for your
Thank you all for your comments. I struggle with disengaging because I was honestly brought up in a 'perfect' house hold. Mom and dad are still together and they brought me up to be the kind woman I am. I know that my DH isn't the best at following through with much of anything and I hate bringing up the kids because it just pisses him off and he shuts down cause he doesn't know what to do about it. I have told my SD a few times that I am done doing everything for her a few months ago, but I always find myself doing more for her then I was before. I just find it so exhausting and half the time I don't want to go home for a while.
To stepx2, I agree 100 percent that I should have said be quiet. The comment she made just lit me up and my blood pressure sky rocketed.
How do I disengage when it comes to driving? She has had her permit almost 6 months and hasn't driven in the last 4 months? I get super anxiety when I drive with her and my DH is exhausted from work by the time he gets home. I've tried to tell him I'm not doing it but we need her to get her license.
I bet you are tired when you
I bet you are tired when you get home too. And from the sounds of it you have a "second shift" taking care of all the household chores.
Don't drive with her - tell him it is his responsibility. If she doesn't get her license, don't drive her anywhere - make him do it. He will probably start driving with her when he realizes he will have to drive her everywhere until she gets her license.