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SD11 won't sleep on her own

Childless stepmom's picture

I'm like done with this crap! Seriously! SD15 not coming this weekend because DH said no to a party ( some rich kid at school rented the rooftop of an upmarket hotel for his 16th birthday) So she is with BM, not sure if she has gone, but hey that's another story. I get home late from the office and the tears and sulky face starts with SD11. Now she can't sleep alone! Please tell me this is not normal and a therapist can deal with this crap?

Childless stepmom's picture

I just can't have another crap weekend with them. Think I'm going to vacate the premises tomorrow.

mamaw64's picture

Is there a reason your 11 yr old doesn't want to sleep in her room? Maybe she's feeling lonely.

Childless stepmom's picture

I'm not sure, would like to find out. She says she is scared but can't say what she is scared of

milldog's picture

I had this problem with my SD when she was 11. My DH allowed her to sleep with him before I moved in. She is 13 now, and would not think of trying that anymore. An 11 year old girl should be successful in her own bed 100% of the time. Her dad needs to retrain her.

I told my DH:

1. I was NOT sleeping in a bed with 3 people. He would have to let me know if he wanted to sleep with his wife, or his adolecent daughter. Sounds creepy when you put it that way.

2. If his daughter went to school and told a teacher that she sleeps in the same bed as her father, they would be mandated to report that to CPS. A teacher friend told me that. Sounds creepy when you put it that way.

3. Raising strong independant women, means you teach them to stand on their own two feet. She shouldn't even need to sleep with her sister at that age.

Good luck, I hope this works out for you.

jojo68's picture

My SD15 would still sleep with her father if he let her. She actually does still co-sleep with her grandmother every night (she lives on the same property as us)Such an odd kid...She has no interest in her room or privacy. :?

GettinJiggyWithIt's picture

When DH and I first moved in together, it took about 6 months to get SD used to sleeping in her own room on a different level of the house. DH allowed her to sleep in his bed when we lived separately. I feel your pain!

Rags's picture

An 11yo can't sleep alone? :? What choice does she have? Dad needs to tell her to "Get your ass in bed and go to sleep and if your crying and whining crap disturbs anyone else's sleep I will take a belt to your butt." And he needs to follow through if she forces his hand.

End of problem.

ocs's picture

We used to have some stupidness like this too.

When I met DH SD was 8 and would sometimes sleep in his bed. I was sleeping over once and found a hair tie/scrunchy thing on my side. The look on my face must have said it all, because it stopped immediately.

SD got all whiny and stopped sleeping at DH's because she was 'scared'. Insert HUGE eyeroll.

In any event, she still cosleeps with her BM and grandmother. She is now 15.