All your comments have made me realise that I'm normal to have these feeling and moments where I just want to scream!! Yesterday was a bad day - me and BF ended up going sleep with the silent treatment which was my error so I've apologised this morning. I know it doesn't do anything to help but sometimes I just want to switch off and go back to my 'old life'where at least my time was my own and I had certain control over things. The BM met someone else and moved out and so when I came on the scene I tried to make it as easy as possible and just did whatever I could so it would be an easy transition of seeing their dad with someone else. That included cooking, cleaning, washing etc (with the help of BF) and the bedroom door was constantly open because that what they were used to so I've never had any privacy. Everything was done the same way as it was when BM lived there and I was expected to just slot in. Somewhere over the 2+ years I think I've lost myself and to be honest have feelings of resentment which isn't their fault - it's my own for allowing it to happen. I'm starting to push back a little and feel better after reading all your comments and will be taking your very good advice - can't help feeling a tad depressed though when I think this is my future. BF does do his bit but at the end of the day, they're his kids so my opinions and feelings will always be low down on the pecking order. From a parental perspective I understand that he has responsibilities but I'm his girlfriend not their BM so I just don't have that desire to constantly be with them and look after them. That sounds awful doesn't it?! x