Just give the gifts to DD when it is just you and Dh at home. Don't make a thing about giving DD the gifts in front of SS. In a case where the grandparent has no relationship at all with the skid nor is she present at the Christmas event where she'd be walking in the door solely with gifts for one of two kids, it's not as big a deal. Gma is shipping gift/s to her greatgrandchild, the gifts are arriving by mail and there are plenty of times when SS is not there to give DD the package.

Gma might enjoy if you taped (or just took pics) of DD opening her gifts and seeing the excitement DD has when she opens them. It's very kind of her to send gifts to DD and she'd very likely appreciate seeing the little one receiving them. Just a thought.

What's going on in your case isn't really a case of your SS being left out or rejected. Your Gma isn't a part of SS's life really nor does she come to the event or he go to her house for the event. It's really not necessary for her to think about including SS in the box she sends

All of my grandparents have passed away and so has my mom. My dad has no interest in SS6. Before I married DH, my dad told me that it was a bad idea because I would always be shortchanged. And that is definitely yet another example of when I should have listened to my dad. When my dad sends us gifts, they're just for me and DH, Skidly is never mentioned. And frankly, my dad has the right idea. I didn't produce the skid, so my blood family has no obligation to give Skidly gifts. Skidly has more than enough blood relations willing to spoil his COD ass.

Yeah OP, like you said, she probably just doesn't think of him and is not being malicious. And as a PP said, I think it's a good idea to give your DD her gifts when SS is not around. My grandma was originally not a fan of SS12 because she first time he went to her house, he annoyed the hell out of her and broke something. She lives with my aunt, who is very mean, and has banned SS from her house so my Gma doesn't see him. Since then, my Gma asks about him quite a bit ("How is the little boy doing?" lol but really, she's being nice about it) and seems to have come around to the idea of him and praying for him etc. However, she still only spends weekends with my Biosons and only buys for them on holidays. Usually the stuff she buys stays at her house anyway. But if she did send them presents, I'd just let them open them when he's not here (he lives with his grandparents who spoil him, long story) so he wouldn't feel left out. My mom also only buys for BSs, but not a lot, and usually things like school clothes. DH has never said anything about it, though his mom buys for all of our kids. Her money, her choice I say.

Don't feel bad! SS has BMs and DHs parents just like your bio has your parents and DHs parents. He's not being short changed if he doesn't even know who she is. Im sure there's someone out there spoiling SS to make up the difference that is your parents giving your bio a gift. And if he does notice, well life is unfair and the sooner ALL kids learn that the easier their life will become

DH's parents sent gifts for skids last week but didn't send one for my BS. They actually did last year but I think it was because he was on their mind since they had just met him at our wedding a couple of months prior. Not a big deal in my opinion. I think some people of that generation just don't think about skids, sgkids, etc. It's a little bit of a generational thing in my opinion. There weren't all these family dynamics 50 years ago.

I put myself in grandma-shoes. I think if my grandkid married someone with kids, then I would be welcoming and friendly to the husband and the kid(s). If I sent cards, I would send them to my grandkid though, because that's my connection. Especially if cards or infrequent phone calls *was* the relationship. I wouldn't be in- or excluding the partner/kids, they just aren't in my relationship with my grandkid.