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SS19 has revealed whats happened...cos I asked and proceeded to reprimand him too!!

stressedstep's picture

SS19 was apparently VERY busy yesterday....he has done his claim for social, and put his name down for the Army and TA.....OH was appeased....but I wasnt and still had tasks I wanted sorted out...so my plan today was to have him out the house at 7am again, and send him to local Council to sort out emergency shelter and more permanent lodgings.......however, as Im not much closer to knowing whats going on in my own home (OH reluctant to discuss the ins and outs, as he doesnt want the stress put on me at all)....I outright asked SS19 this morning what the hell was going on.

He said he was having assistance with the rent, but (in the UK we have a bedroom tax, so if you have an extra room not being used and you have benefits, you have to pay a weekly charge for the extra room)...benefit does not cover the bedroom tax, so there is a small debt.....I asked why he had been evicted then...and he said it was because he was basically living at his GFs, and the councils round here will evict you if they think your claiming from an address your not living at.....so, I LET RIP!!!.....I mean, how f*cking stupid could you be......so I asked if he had tried to sort it, and got met with a blank face.....I told him that the flat and his stuff could have been saved if he had asked for help....he said he didnt know......I said "well you wouldnt, thats what happens when you ignore us for 3 -4 months on end then only show up when the sh*t has hit your fan!!"....I have looked into all this, and SS19 has a very credible cause to claim permanent assistance.....I told SS19 that he needed to get a grip, that this is life, not a video game you press "restart" on.....and that its HIS home, said he cant sleep on my sofa forever, nor can he live as a nomad......told him that this is the last time Im helping him, found him 2 flats before and look whats happened....

So, I changed plan today. OH is on his 24hr shift today, and nights for the remainder of the week....and I have a nursery that needs finishing....SS19 has done a decorating course, a couple of years ago, so Ive told him he can finish it that off as his dad wont have chance until next week......tomorrow, SS19 has been made aware that after I have sorted his issues out and told him what he needs to do and say, he will be out at 7am in the morning to go and sort out emergency shelter and then onto (hopefully) permanent lodgings that DO NOT include my home.......

Told OH this morning what I had said......he didnt say anything, but then he cant....he didnt realise the flat could have been either.....so now he is more annoyed with SS19!!

I know, it goes against my grain to assist him again....but if I dont, he will be on my sofa for weeks and weeks until OH finally loses the plot totally....and im not waiting weeks and weeks.......

Also, I think OH did tell SS19 he couldnt move back in on a perm basis...that we didnt have the room now....even MIL is trying to come up with ideas on where SS19 could stay......

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stressedstep's picture

This is pretty much what I did tell him......I have told him to not mention he is on our sofa, as the council will drag out the shelter.....He decorating the nursery..Im not having him dossing at my house whilst I work and OH does......but tomorrow, he off to get sorted.....don't know how long these shelters take if im honest......found out half hour ago that he lost the flat 2 - 3 weeks ago!!!! :jawdrop:

stressedstep's picture

See...BM wont as she has "no use" for him, MIL lives in a 1 bed apartment about 45 mins drive away! lol...and BMs mom has BMs oldest son (which is my OHs ex SS!).....Ive already wondered why he hasnt gone to SS17s....must remember to ask that question later on! }:).....

Sadly, OH and MIL have helped create this lazy sorry ass.....all pity and "oh poor poor SS19".....hell even I bought it for quite some time!.....

I will use him to my advantage whilst he is around......but I want him out as soon as possible too......