So hard to keep quiet
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It's skid time again at my house. Lately it seems harder and harder to keep my mouth shut when skids talk about how wonderful BM is. I feel like if it wasn't such a lie then it wouldn't be so hard to stomach. I have never said anything but I just feel like I am at breaking point. Oh well. Time to hide!
Good point. "Time to
Good point. "Time to hide!"
Retreat to your room, sort the laundry, wear your iPod or just put earplugs in. I wear Mack's Earplugs at night because I am a light sleeper and DH snores, but I found they come in handy when I don't want to hear the SDs. Clean your bathroom, clean out your closet, do something productive so your time is not wasted when the skids are there. Or go out and get your hair cut, get the car washed, run errands.
I am a homebody, so my room is like my apartment on the weekends.
It makes me more comfortable.
~ Moon
I have definitely been hiding
I have definitely been hiding out in my room and making plans out of the house whenever possible. The skids have been picking up on it, I think, but I don't care. It's this way or run for the hills because I can't handle anymore!
Yep. I totally understand
Yep. I totally understand it's easier for ss14 to buy BM's lies and stories regarding why she left when he was 5 and why she can't take care of him now that he's 14.
I roll my eyes, correct him constantly - gently, of course, "why do you think your mom doesn't want to ouch you up for an extra day? Does it make sense to you that she would say one thing to you and then do another". - and I leave it at that.
I wish I could just jump to
I wish I could just jump to the "all grown up phase"!
Facts are not good or bad,
Facts are not good or bad, they are just facts. Speak the facts. Kids need them to be able to defend themselves against lies and manipulation. Give them in an age appropriate manner and as the kids get older they will obtain a complete picture.
In our case eventually the Skid knew where the Custody/Visitation/Support drawers in our file cabinettes were and he would dig through them doing his own research on the crap his Sperm Clan was feeding him. Now that he is a self supporting young adult he is fully informed and more than capable to protect himself from the toxic Sperm Clan and keep the shallow and polluted end of his gene pool well under control.
The kid would periodically come to the dinner table from a lies and manipulation research session looking notably hurt. "Mom and dad, why would they lie to me likey they do." We would be supportive and discuss the issue(s) over dinner and usually he would transition from being hurt, to being angry with them, and ultimately laughing at how pathetic they are. His mom and I would just be there for him and clarify any facts he had quiestions about.
They hated that he had the facts when he was on Sperm Land for visitation. When he was old enough to be effectively armed with the facts and to understand them well they could no longer manipulate him.
Mission accomplised. }:)