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My husband can be such an ass!

Ruby55's picture

Evil 25 year old step son stole $4500 from us, 25 separate ATM withdrawals with my husbands ATM card while he was lying in a hospital for 3 months having a transplant, came close to death. The kid is disgusting. And after forgiving him and entering into an agreement on a repayment koan, he gave us an attitude about making his measly payment and was beyond disrescpectful. Finally made the payment that month but I decided I'm done, won't see him again and he is never to set foot in this home, husband can see him elsewhere. He's due for his November payment and is a week late. Husband is such an ass, won't even ask him for the $200 bucks, doesn't went to upset him!!!! Meanwhile I am the sole breadwinner and who knows if husband will ever work again, I'm the one saddled with the bills, paying hundreds a month in medication bills to keep husband alive! And he won't even ask this pos thief for his payment. Am I wrong to feel completely taken advantage of?

Ruby55's picture

Thank you and I agree! I think he actually thinks because it was stolen from his business account, it's not really stealing from me which really ticks me off. The kid basically stole the entire profit from that last job he did before he got sick which would have gone toward OUR household. I told him, "where the hell do you think my paycheck goes every month, to our household". It's definitely causing strain between us and making me lose respect for him which I don't want to happen. . He wonders why his kid turned out to be such an awful human being, as far as I'm concerned it's because HE has enabled it!

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Ruby - stealing from your husband's business account is even worse. Call the police! Rest assured, the SS is going to do it again unless there are consequences. I'm wondering, though, how he got the ATM password etc.? Is he on the account?

Also, did he do this over a period of time, or just go out and make all the transactions and take the money?

He stole from you as well. It is affecting YOUR life. Nope, some kind of charges have to be pressed and the court to approve a payment plan WITH consequences if Sonny doesn't want to make his payments on time.

gigiboo's picture

ok YIKES. I haven't gotten married to the man yet, but what state was that in that would include my income in cs if I do? Because there are five potential skids.

Ruby55's picture

Unfortunately I can't file any changes since it wasn't my bank account and husband won't. Of course I won't not buy his meds. I have always been the main bread winner since his health had not been great but his income helps. That makes it even worse. This kid knew I'd be the one to suffer. I was off work for 3 months, no pay, to care for my hushed and of course wanted to. He knew I'd be the one to take the hit financially. It's just so wrong that husband is so weak he can't can't tell this kid "your payment is due". Tip toes around him. I'm so glad I made the decision though that he will never set foot it this home ever again. I know karma will get him, but it just really angers me the way husband acts afraid of this kid.

Ruby55's picture

Lol. I agree. I've asked and he just gets pissy with ME! Says he will ask for it and never does and makes me feel like I'm nagging about it. It's beyond dysfunctional! It's so awful I actually fantasize about karma getting this kid.

blayze's picture

I understand that it's an adult stepkid who did this, but since this issue is now between you and your husband, it's only right that HE - the dad - pays you back. You can be mad at the skid as much as you want, but something in Dad's parenting made the kid feel like this was acceptable. Be mad at your husband, and even though he was sick, make him pay that money back. HIS offspring (and the parenting that made that offspring who he is!) caused this issue.

blayze's picture

By the way, EVERY man should be able to use his skills to do a "side hustle" for money... cutting grass, shoveling snow, selling crap on ebay, blogging, etc. You make YOUR MAN pay for the losses that you encounter by dealing with HIS child.

Rags's picture

Whether you feel taken advantage of or not ... reality is that both DH and his thief spawn are taking advantage of you and most disgusting is that your DH is fully complicit in your being taken advantage of. Time to call the police and put POS SS in prison. I think $4500 is in the grand theft threshold.

Laying out $4500 of DH’s meds and telling him that when those are gone no will be purchased unless the money to buy the meds is in hand from SS should set the point. Then punch 911 into the phone, hand it to him, and tell him he has a choice. Push call or not but the next $4500 in meds won’t be paid for by you.

See how he responds.

Good luck.

Miss T's picture

Total household income also is included when FAFSA calculations are made. This can have a huge effect on a parent's expected contribution to college expenses, which translates to a chunk o' change out of the steppocket.

Love is grand and all that, but if you have assets or an income, drop a couple hundred bucks on a chat with an attorney before you give your darling his own underwear drawer. It will be money well spent.

Miss T's picture

Sorry, this comment was supposed to be a reply way upthread. It's true anywhere it ends up, though.