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Dad she's punishing BS...

Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Wed, 10/22/2014 - 3:56pm

Bs was saying a word he's not allowed to say .. I called him down. SS was sitting there the entire time doing hw. Bs said it again and I said if u say it again your're in trouble.. So he said it again, testing me, so I go to pop his butt and SS says he didn't actually say the word.. I said I know what he said and I told him what would happen. So as I'm going to get BS the SS pipes up DAAAAAD!!!! TELL HER HE DIDNT SAY THE WORD!!!! (Daaaady wasn't even in the room with us..) my reply was no SS this is my child and my responsibility I will discipline as I see fit and I will discipline for what I feel like needs to be punished .. We don't go asking daddy to make sure I'm right .. Meanwhile SS couldn't even get his spelling hw done right but he needs to correct my parenting.. I think not little turd

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Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Wed, 10/22/2014 - 4:03pm

Prob! Lol they got use to daddy defending them when I called them down.. He's since gotten better but they like to think my opinions and what I say doesn't matter is not to be listened to by anyone .. Of course mommy dearest use to tell them and prob still does that they dont have to listen to me and I'm not a good parent. So that doesn't help either

StepX2's picture

Submitted by StepX2 on Wed, 10/22/2014 - 5:30pm

Tha's what I was going to say. It sounds like SS is used to dad jumping into the middle when you discipline so it's the norm for him.

Gail's picture

Submitted by Gail on Wed, 10/22/2014 - 4:09pm

wah-wah 11:

I find myself in this situation as well. I often wonder if this is my punishment for marrying a divorced man. If I should have just stayed married to my POS ex. At least he couldn't treat me like I'm just a baby sitter. The problem now is, I can tell that SD and SS do love me. They have been through enough without loosing someone else in their life.
Gail

Shaman29's picture

Submitted by Shaman29 on Wed, 10/22/2014 - 4:21pm

I like this advice.

The authority of an adult ends the second the kid or skid asks "why" and we explain ourselves or justify our actions.

I've said it before and I'm going to say it again. All kids are like teeny, tiny terrorists and should be treated as such. Do not negotiate with them at all.

Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Wed, 10/22/2014 - 4:31pm

Bahahaha your wording is hilarious but you are right . I honestly wasn't trying to explain myself TO him or why BS was in trouble .. Only staying facts of why daddy's approval wasn't needed

Shaman29's picture

Submitted by Shaman29 on Wed, 10/22/2014 - 4:38pm

I honestly understand that wasn't your intent, but as women we tend to feel the need to explain the situation. I think it's an innate pedantic streak we tend to have. I've had many, many management courses for women in an effort to stop this madness.

While there are times it's required (Why are you killing the neighbors?), most of the time it's a control tactic by subordinates to make the one in authority question their decisions and make you feel as though you're on an even level with them(BS didn't say that, I'm telling Dad you're punishing him!).

Skid (SD19) used to question Hs decisions all of the time. He would turn around to explain and I would say STOP! You're the adult, she is the kid. You told her to do the dishes and do her homework. That is ALL she needs to know.

I'd get this look from H :jawdrop: .

And this look from skid :O.

Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Wed, 10/22/2014 - 4:48pm

Makes perfect sense to me! And I use to tell DH do to explain urself to them .. U r the parent and they r the kids so what u say is what goes .. Now he uses the bc I told u so and that's all u need to know .. Sometimes he will explain .. I try to just say bc I'm the mom in this house .. Which is an explanation lol

thinkthrice's picture

Submitted by thinkthrice on Wed, 10/22/2014 - 4:28pm

"Yes, SS, it's called PARENTING--something you've obviously never experienced."

Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Wed, 10/22/2014 - 4:35pm

Daddy has made the coment to him that we do not want bs growing up to be like him.. He wasn't a fan of hearing that but nothing changed

Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Wed, 10/22/2014 - 4:38pm

He knows daddy gets a say .. But he also knows if I say no daddy will back me.. Just as if daddy says no & they come to me I say I'm not going against daddy..
But my point is I'm not going to discuss with DH how to discipline Our child when he says &$$.. We have a mutual agreement on how that is handled

Teas83's picture

Submitted by Teas83 on Wed, 10/22/2014 - 7:36pm

My SD6 "tells" on me all the time.....to DH, BM, GBM, and probably others that I don't even know about.

It's so obnoxious when she does it to DH in front of me. I stopped caring what she thinks of me and and I tell her how it is: she has to listen to me in my house. I tell her that I'm an adult and make decisions in our house and it's not her place to question it.

Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Thu, 10/23/2014 - 7:50am

Sounds great except it's everything I do we have to verify with daddy ..turn the the tv it's past bed time. But we didn't get to watch a movie tonight.. Sorry yiu did other stuff a movie isn't a requirement for every night it's bed time and u have school..... Ask dad if we can watch tv.. No I'm not asking dad I said turn the tv off ...... DAAAAAAAAD!!!! .... DH: wah wah says tv off so turn it off ...
Me: see wouldn't have just been easier to turn the tv off?