So I shouldn't feel crazy?

Newbie here I've been dating my boyfriend for 5 months, he's the greatest and we're crazy in love. He has three kids, two boys (16 & 18) and a girl (5 going on 6) Having kids was a deal breaker for me but I told myself I should give him a shot since he seemed great. Turns out we fell in love, bought a house, moved in, the whole nine yards. I know I totally rushed it. Tonight was only the second time being with his daughter (5 years old) and I'm feeling VERY overwhelmed. I held it together pretty well all day but then I just started to get annoyed with everything.. Marker on the couch and table, salty chip fingers on the new upholstered bench, kicking the couch that I'm sitting on, asking a million questions, etc.. I know she's just a kid, and I know these are materialistic things, but they're things I bought with my hard earned money. We went to the store to get a bed skirt and of course she was able to bat her eyes and get a new dolly, to go along with all the others. Am I wrong to get annoyed? Is this normal? I feel awful because we got into it while she was in the other room, about if we should even be together.. What I'd like to gain from this site is a new outlook on how I can deal with this every other weekend that we have her here. Help!

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Some people on here will

Some people on here will chastise you for moving too fast-I won't because my mom and dad met, fell in love and got married in 5 months. 23 years later they're still going strong, and the was a step situation as well. The big difference is my dad made sure to is kids plenty as well as time with my mom. He wanted to be there for us and truly loved kids. He adopted us. He's my dad. DH and I moved in together at 7 months-but I had already spent time with his daughter and I was reading step parent forums to make sure i had the whole picture, warts and all. Kids are a deal breaker for me as well-I want one. So if DH had told me on our first date (yeah I laid it all out there), that he wasn't open to having at least one more child, I would have walked.

If you don't mind me asking, how old are you? Why would you even date someone that has one of your personal dating red flags and then go so far as to buy a home and move in? I know when you first fall in love its easy, but it seems fast even to me with my history. Or maybe not well considered would be a better way of putting it.

Thanks for your reply. I'm

Thanks for your reply. I'm 30, he's 39. I had been single for 4.5 years prior to him so maybe I felt really ready for all of it? When we first started dating he made sure I knew his daughter was with him part time, every other weekend type of deal so I thought I could deal with it just fine.. Saying/thinking are much easier than doing also, the house is in my name only. I'm not that crazy..

My momma didn't raise no

My momma didn't raise no dummy.. Hah

Since this is his third kid

Since this is his third kid he doesn't really pay much attention to the annoying things she's doing if he's not right there with her. He's told me that she already has two parents and doesn't need another one, so for me that makes me feel like I should just sit there and let it happen, or look at him whenever she's getting into trouble. I'm not allowed to voice my concerns to her? He's the fun parent and g
Takes her to chuck e cheese every other weekend to make her happy.

Doesn't sound too bad yet, if

Doesn't sound too bad yet, if bf/you set some house rules and expectations of behavior. If it's only visit #2 there's time to implement fairly smoothly before things really get out of hand. Makers on a sofa? greasy snack on furniture? Nope. All no-nos. Coloring belongs at a safe place such as the dining table (a child's placemat to cover the surface). Snacks too. Too many dolls? Stay out of the toy department or promise something like a coloring book or a child's reading book if Daddy 'just has' to buy something.

Sit with bf and discuss what goes and what doesn't in the home setting with behavior. Kicking sofa? Feel free to tell her that isn't appropriate ladylike behavior and to stop. BF needs to back you up.

Yeah, we definitely need to

Yeah, we definitely need to get plastic table coverings when she comes to ease my mind..

She has him wrapped around her cute little finger, no wait, her entire hand. I've watched her put on her doe eyes and ask politely and he jumps up every time. So when we say "you can get a $5 toy" and she picks out the $15 one that makes a ton of noise, he caves instantly. A little frustrating, no?