While they technically can't use your income to calculate a new CS ammt., a good lawyer knows how to work around that technicality.

I would advise against joint finances if he has or will have any arrears or other debt. If they get an order to do so, they can take the money out no matter if it is yours or his just because his name is on the account.

I wouldn't do it until CS was no longer an issue.

What a subject! Don't get me started... we have just finished a court hearing initiated by the BM in April, and there is no decision yet. But here is how it went for us.

We have combined our finances after getting married 2 years ago, and have a joint as well as indiviudal checking accounts; all savings are separate. But that did not matter in our case at all. What mattered was how we paid taxes - jointly for the last 2 years. That was stupid - do NOT do that IF there is any chance you will end up in court. The greedy BM who went to court to prove DH had underpaid her CS demanded that he provide his tax returns while refusing to provide her $1,000,000+ annually grossing business taxes. So when our lawyer got involved, we had to exchange taxes, and send over the joint tax returns and DH's W2s. ( For those who are going to be indignant that i am saying "our lawyer" - i co-signed the contract and he is my lawyer in the same measure as DH's, for reasons we do not need to get into right now. This year I handled the bulk of the court-related stuff.)

So what happened is that even though BM had DH's W2s for all those years - and he only has one job, the same he has worked at for the last 25 years, she seized upon the joint income on the 2 latest tax returns and immediately started claiming that the all-important pro-rata share, which is to be used for determining extras and college expenses, needs to be based on his AND MINE income together. My income came from multiple sources as i have always worked more than one job, but i had one W2 in 2011 and 2012 that was added to DH's W2 income. That was 40% of my total income. The BM thought it was fair game. Mind you, she knows i have 2 sons who i support and i support my mother and claim her as a dependent on my taxes. Matters not at all to her. This is so beyond pale: she tried to ROB me after i rolled out the red carpet to her entitled children, that things have really crystallized in my mind since. She is a vile creature without any morals or ethics and i hope she gets hit by the karma bus some time soon.

So the moral of my story is, do not show your income on documents your DH may have to produce to the courts/lawyers/BM. My lawyer said he had printed out a case decided by a court in our state that shows using the SM's income is inappropriate but he di not have to give it to the judge. However, i do not have the decision yet, and i do not know if we won or lost. I will keep you posted.

Which state are you in?

It depends on how CS is calculated. If they take into account how much your husband spends on living expenses, the fact that you have a joint account will affect that, as in, his living expenses supposedly go down because of your contribution, and his CS will go up.

Also, read the law. For some jurisdictions, it states that all assets that the payor has access to, through gifts, inheritance, or REMARRIAGE are subject to review and taken into consideration for CS or college tuition for the stepchild. Even if your state doesn't do it now, it may in the future and then you're screwed.

I don't want to be that test case that other lawyers reference because I set the precedence when I lost. Do you?

Here ya go, you wanted proof, here it is.

http://www.attorneys.com/child-support/impacts-of-remarriage-on-child-an...

Keep separate accounts HE should have HIS separate account. YOU should have YOUR separate account. BOTH of YOU should have a JOINT account that is ONLY used for household expenses and since you will both have similar incomes you each should provide half the expenses. PLEASE don't do like my wife has done me. Her lazy but refused to work full time even though she had opportunity to. Initially it was because her kids were young and she wanted to be there when they got out of school. Then it was she didn't want to work full time. She has NEVER helped on household expenses, vacations or any thing else. Her money has gone into her savings or spent on her kids. We recently got into a bad argument because her computer was having problems and she wanted ME to buy her a new one. She has over $8,000 in HER checking account. She complained to her daddy and he bought her a computer. I'm tired of supporting someone I get nothing from in return.

My DH has direct deposit into an account that is under his name, and every week he withdrawls all but what is used for child support and deposits it into an account under my name (my income is also direct deposited into it). We use this account for savings, to pay rent, groceries, etc, he has full access to it but it's not a joint acct.
I worried about BM too.. So even though she hasn't tried (yet!) to access it, I didn't want for her to even be able to somehow gain access and view how much money we have, or for the money to be accessible for the court to see. They are not allowed to look at sm's accts, only the BM and your DH.
This works for us, so maybe it'll help you? Like you I did not feel comfortable with keeping our finances seperated but I did want to protect us from that selfish woman and her lawyer.

Well I learned something new from a friend this weekend about this subject. My friend is newly married. She is a doctor, so she makes pretty good money. She married a guy who is behind on his child support tho. So now they will file their taxes separately and there is some form she is going to sign that states that she is not liable for his debts. Because since he is behind in child support they can take it out of her money if she doesn't file this form.

My DW and I combined finances when we first married nearly 20yrs ago. We have not had any issues with that. When we married the Sperm Clan attempted to have my income included in calculating CS in an effort to reduce their CS obligation. That did not work. Once we married their CS initially went from$110 /mo and over the years increased to $133/mo to as high as $785/mo all based on my DW's pay and the Sperm Idiot's pay. As my DW's pay went up the Sperm Idiot's CS went up.

Most states use a version of the income shares model. This determines CS based on the total income available for support of the child from both bio parents then assigns a % of income and CS to each parent. The NCP pays the CP based on the result of the calculation. In our case as my DW completed college, grad school and her CPA and her career advanced the Sperm Idiot stagnated in income and kept adding out of wedlock children his CS kept going up and up and up.

The Sperm Clan tried twice to get my income added in an attempt to lower their CS. Neither time were they successful. However, the Sperm Clan did make a motion for an income credit due to my significant income which they were successful with. On the first occasion the Judge commented that "Step Dad makes a significant income. Bio Dad shold not be penalized by having to suport an artificially elevated standard of living for the child." Sperm Idiot was given a $1000/mo reduction to his income which only lowered his CS obligation by $50/mo. Not a big deal but it did piss me off that the Sperm Idiot benefited in any way from my income.

On the second occassion they Sperm Clan motioned again that my income be considered in calculation of CS. Again they were declined. The fun part was we motioned for the Sperm GrandParent's income to be added to the SPerm Idiots since he lives rent free in a rental property that they own, they paid the Sperm Idiot's CS on my SS, paid his CS obligation to baby mama #2 for Spawn #2 and raise spawn #3 and #4 in their home with no help from the Sperm Idiot. The judge accepted our request which freaked the Sperm Clan out completely. The ruling however was to decline both their request to include my income and our requiest to include the Sperm Grandparent's income and then granted the income credit due to my income. Still only reducing the new CS amount by $50/mo. The good news is that CS went up by nearly $300% even with the income credit.

IMHO there is not a lot of risk in combining finances. Generally the courts are pretty good at not raping Sparents regarding CS owed by NCP spouses. The one high risk area is regardling joint tax returns. If there is CS arrears then returns can be taken. If your DH has arrears then I suggest filing married filing separately.

To minimize the risk that the state CSE office might back money out of our account due to an error on their part we set up direct deposit of CS to an online bank account that auto transferred the money immediately upon depost. That account allowed for a zero balance and would not allow overdraft so there was no way the CSE office could remove money from that account.

Good luck.

My attorney has recommended that we do one joint account and separate accounts and sign a prenup. Not for the possibility of us divorcing, but for outlining what assets and $$ is whose coming into the marriage. If XYZ money is outlined as mine coming into the marriage, it remains mine through the marriage and can't be touched by outside sources. So on paper we will have mine and his, but with the mutual understanding that in reality it's all ours.

joining may actually benefit. But all depends on trust. If done correctly (which may never be the case) your income combined puts you and spouse in higher tax bracket which may actually reduce support especially if you have kids of your own. the problem is that there are alot of factors to put into the calculation and it all depends on who is entering the info and what they feel like putting in for the actual calculation. Best result is usually to go through the state dcss who will deduct whatever the cs amount is from your SO's paycheck through work and not pull from a bank account. But you need to stay on top of it in case SO loses job and immediately file for change of order if that does happen. whether or not the other party knows your income makes no difference.

Joining on reporting income that is... I would still keep separate bank accounts and one joint for bills etc...

Talk to a lawyer, she is supposed to have no rights to any amount of money you make. Make sure both you and your DH can get copies of check stubs so you can show this is his income and this is mine. It doesn't have to be seperate checking accounts but the seperation has to be made known to any CS judge. When my DH was laid off Inbred tried to get CS from me and it just wasn't going to happen. He's responsible for financially supporting his kids, not you.

I don't believe that BM can go after my money unless a court determines that DH is deliberately underemploying himself, which is a problem since I make significantly more than DH. And there goes my dream of DH being a stay-at-home dad because there's no f'ing way that I'm paying his CS for him.

We keep completely separate accounts largely due to what happened to DH's parents. My FIL is my MIL's second husband. They live in Massachusetts. She had a daughter with the first husband. The second husband, my FIL, couldn't stand the daughter and she was kicked out of their house when she was a teenager (and yet my DH can't understand why I feel so conflicted about his son's existence in our lives). Anyway, long story short, the daughter decided she wanted to go to college. So the birth father went after my MIL for payment. The court agreed and raided my MIL & FIL's joint savings account to pay for the daughter's college. All of their savings were essentially wiped out in one fell swoop. They had planned on buying a house, but they couldn't because the down payment was gone. And it took them a long time to recover from that financial devastation.

So I would strongly advise against joining finances in anyway that can be tracked by the courts. A lawyer should be able to help you navigate this terrain. And it's nice to believe that when we marry that everything will be shared and that everyone will be fair, but it reality this almost never happens. My mantra is watch out for yourself first. Only then can you begin to take care of anyone else.

DON'T DO IT and file your taxes separately! We learned this the hard way. CS continues to be computed for my husband not based on his income, but based on the amount of taxes filed. We did it once and child support went up to an outrageous amount. We pointed out to the CS judge that my income was being includeded and the Judge said it was based on household. Um, no not per the law. Guess what, nothing changed so we started to file separately and now DH's income is only one taken into consideration, but for 2 years it sucked.

From experience, they absolutely cannot use your income for child support. The amount of child support paid must be based off of dads income.

Basically, my husband just chose for his wages to be garnished for child support. That way it gets taken out just like taxes would or whatever. And it always gets paid on time.
But just know your finances are safe basically they go off of the parents income. Step parent cannot be "punished"

But it may vary on state. In the state where the skids are, the court went off of my husbands w2

Ah, the doe eyed newbies who all think it will be OK.

Our attorney advised us to only share one household account until after the youngest skid turns 18. And to only ever keep enough in there to cover the mortgage and household expenses. We have an account each and then the joined one which is only for the household bills. Greedy BM would definitely try for more money otherwise. I once believed as you do, my parents shared everything and are married 58 years. Life taught me the opposite and I wish I had been financially advised to be more careful. You can love a man deeply but also stay financially independent.......if a relationship ever does go south, so too does your hard earned savings if he/she takes them out of anger, bitterness and resentment.

Don't combine.

Find out your state's laws / talk to a lawyer.

Don't take on your skids expenses (don't create a paper trail). Have dad do that.

One person here said she will not marry DH duer to financial and inheritance reasons. I can't say that that isn't a REALLY GOOD approach.

If you are married and you die, DH gets everything. Then when he dies all the kids have an equal cut.

Ex: you have 2 kids. you have 2 skids.

you have a $500,000 insurance policy plus $200,000 401K plus cash in a bank account plus heirloom jewelry, etc...

you die.

It all goes to spouse.

Spouse dies.

everything - your's included - gets cut 4 ways.

lots of people are fine with that.

personally i am not which is why i have a trust in place.

this may offend some people, but i worked REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY hard for what i have and i believe that the assests that belong to me should be passed down to my children (with a portion willed to my partner, of course) and NO ONE ELSE.

and i also don't see how or why that would ever offend anyone either. why would you want something that does not belong to you? i have personally never understood that. it seems icky to me.

my older SS is like me. he would NEVER accept anything that belonged to me after i died - ever. i suppose it could be because deep down he hates me? he blames me? but i tend to think its his nature. he is VERY PROUD and VERY independent. he firmly believes that anything he needs in life that his parents should've given to him should've been give to him by the people who created him and not me or anyone else. so he would never take moeny or possessions that used to belong to me. and i have to say i relate to taht stance and respect it. if his BM ever left something to one of my kids (would NEVER happen, but, hypothetically) i would IMMEDIATELY return it and give it to the skids.

Now the younger two skids are a WHOLE DIFFERENT STORY.

for whatever reason - that i cannot begin to fathom - they actually behave as if and seem to believe that they are entitled to what is mine after i die. but yet they kind of give off the air that they depise me. ????????????????? huh????????

that's just plain WACKY to me (and i'd love it if ANYONE could explain how a self-respecting person could have this stance? - just simple greed?)

my SD is THE WORST OF ALL. she will blatantly - in front of me - ask her dad if he is going to leave MY HOUSE (my name on title, my name on loan and EVERY mortgage payment made by me; named in my trust) to her after he dies.

it's so outrageous that i can only assume that she is completely clueless about anything legal-financial in nature (though she is over 18).

but this is a girl who will say the nastiest snide crap and then help herself to my clothes (have caught her in my closet).

she's just.... real interesting.

suffice it to say, that I KNOW THE LAW. I have my own lawyer/estate planner and I a will and trust. you might want to consider having one made as well.

One more thing: the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

during a second custody hearing the BM tried to ask me for my W-2's and financial info.

thankfully the judge put a quick end to that and told them, "absolutely not - cannot consider her income. motion denied". we got all this info through DH's lawyer.

i can't help but think: she must feel embarrassed after trying to pull something like that. "i want some of HER money too..." --- uuuhhhh.... i didn't make or break any vows with you and egg and egg can't combine to make a baby, so...

some courts are sensible!!!!

btw - BM is with a family doctor who i am sure is making at least 90k. we never though ONCE that his income should come into the picture. who does that???