blog #1
So, I have finally taken the first step, registered to blog!
I have lived with the family for nearly a year.
I love them.
Well, mostly I love my bloke!!
The children are great, but they're kids! Teenagers.
I previously was a very independent, social person. I loved my life.
No need to compromise on too much, yes it sounds selfish & perhaps it was. Yet I am a giver.
Hence the difficulty I now feel, where 3 people depend on me; at times I feel resentment, which doesn't last long, but can definitely reoccur!
I try not to verbalise too much at any one time, because I chose this & must do what I can, when I can, to make it as easy as possible on all of us.
Great in theory!!
my current status is depressed & angry!
Dam it!!
there, first vent complete!
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Comments
It's nice to be a caring
It's nice to be a caring giving person. But if you care and give to everyone without giving to yourself you set yourself up,for failure, then you blame everyone else for taking everything and giving nothing in return, when you sent the message to them in the first place that, that's how things work around here.
You really do teach people how to treat you. You need to teach them you have needs too, that you are a person too and you need to say, Wait a minute, or not today , or plain old fashioned NO. You need to say, wait till I do this or finish that, or even, yes, but I'm having a cup of tea first then I'll help you, whatever. You need to delegate and you need to ask for help.
If you keep giving and getting nothing in return, yep. You do finish up angry and resentful. It's up to you though, you need to start looking after you so they learn you have needs to.
Teenagers are naturally self absorbed. You need to look after you and set that example for them. They are not the centre of the universe and sometimes it really is all about you.
Thanks emotionally beat up, I
Thanks emotionally beat up, I appreciate your words... yes.. I've not felt the need to be on this site for months... which I see as a good thing.
... the swings & roundabouts of teenage emotions... mostly, they pass within hours/days, but for the past couple of weeks, the teens have been shockers.
I have deflected most tantrums & stone faces for the most part, but today is one of those days where I just think... yeah.... here's a half cooked meal.... this is how life is when you do half a job.
Mostly... I say to self... well... they did half a job not zero!
Aahhh venting.... this is all it is... I am working on myself so as not to lose too much of me... keep some independence, fun times in life to balance the sulks & poor behaviour of the teens.