I've never talked to BM#2, so I can't say for sure. But according to her, my DH controlled her in every aspect (financials, friends, their relationship). From what I've seen, it was the opposite. DH gave up his job so she could go back to work after SS7 was born because she demanded he be the stay at home parent. She claimed all sorts of crazy things, all of which are untrue. Rape, physical and emotional abuse, took their son to a women's shelter for 3 months because he ended the relationship. He had been trying to salvage it for years and I'm (obviously) glad he ended it. Purely toxic relationship. Before she went to the women's shelter (she told DH she was going to the "bank to pay for lunch for everyone") she actually said to DH and his best friend/ old boss that she was "going to nail him for rape and nobody would believe him otherwise". This was also in front of their (at the time) 4 year old son. I guess she didn't realize that claiming an untrue rape was serious and she actually was berated by the judge during their custody battle (who unfortunately retired :()
Anyone else terrified that their BS's will end up in a relationship with these nut cases? Dear Lord....

BM's version of events? DH was actually madly in love with her which is why he cheated on his GF of 5 years with her (and she cheated on her SO of 9 years with him) and when she got preggo (after claiming she was infertile due to cervical scarring from rape trauma--which turned out not to be true because her mother said she had cervical scarring due to her taking a medication known for it when she was preggo with BM, and that she was on meds for Crohn's which makes pregnancies unviable--also untrue, she, according to her mother only has IBS, and that she had already started menopause--also untrue, duh.) he got scared off, and then JUST as they were working things out, I came in and seduced him.

Nevermind that he constantly told her he didn't love her (she believes he was in denial about his feelings) and it was just physical, and he even told her he didn't even like her as a person,but she still, to this day, believes they were "in love."

DH and I started dating 6 months after he broke it off with her (they had a month and a half "fling") and four months after she told him she was preggo.

When I knew she was crazy?

Well, when I knew she was then working as an acrobat in the circus and her exSO was (and is) a professional clown, I suspected she couldn't have been all "there."

Then when shit hit the fan and she came out pregnant and basically destroyed DH's life with her lies, then I for sure knew she was off the deep emd.

Never heard BMs version of the break up, it happened 14 or 15 years ago....I heard SOs we were friends at the time.
Basically his first marriage ended and so did BMs thats how SO and BM ended up getting together and became married quickly less then 3 years together. What I didnt like was that he left BM a lone with their 1 year old daughter and she was pregnant with SS, I was a single mother when I met SO so my red flags were up(to be honest)..he said she left him first and she was manipulative and thought having kids was the right thing to do around 34. She suffered from bipolar, was crying never worked, SO did, she spent all their money he was doing contract IT work eventually became director of IT at a convention centre in a prestigious city and lost it, due to her temper tantrums.(I dont believe she has bipolar I think it is her way of behaving badly when things dont go her way). He was struggling with leaving when their daughter was born, but stayed but eventually couldnt take the instability anymore.

How did I know she was a Looney Tune, too many accounts to remember-

1)she signed their then 13 year old daughter to dance school, we were o she was the only non-cultured kid there..(there is nothing wrong with that) but you could tell her daughter felt out of place...it was for inner city kids, not rich people,BMs family are millionaires, so the dance class was free...that was skeptic episode #1 for me.

2)She started asking me, when my birthday was, do i have any siblings...common q's I guess....i wouldnt ask my exs gf those..(by the way she wasnt trying to be friendly, this was her being nosey...)

3)Demanding ridiculous items at christmas times, to get SD $300 UGG Boots, son new WII console on top of other ridiculous requests...she thinks SO is hiding money from her as when they were together, he was bringing in $10-15,000 monthly cheques, former IT Consultant....that was 15 years ago...its really apparent this is not happening now. Calling about CS constantly get a life, you will get your money...just not always when you want it...

4)This really irritated the hell out of me....ive said it before, being overly inquisitve about my vehicle and the posessions within my vehicle...asking, "is that your car?" "wow thats a nice camera" and just this snyde look on her face while she was asking it b.....meanwhile she forgets to mention SS failed gr.8.

All of the above is when I realized, you really should have your own cartoon show....this shit cant be real...trust me it is!

Never heard BMs version of the break up, it happened 14 or 15 years ago....I heard SOs we were friends at the time.
Basically his first marriage ended and so did BMs thats how SO and BM ended up getting together and became married quickly less then 3 years together. What I didnt like was that he left BM a lone with their 1 year old daughter and she was pregnant with SS, I was a single mother when I met SO so my red flags were up(to be honest)..he said she left him first and she was manipulative and thought having kids was the right thing to do around 34. She suffered from bipolar, was crying never worked, SO did, she spent all their money he was doing contract IT work eventually became director of IT at a convention centre in a prestigious city and lost it, due to her temper tantrums.(I dont believe she has bipolar I think it is her way of behaving badly when things dont go her way). He was struggling with leaving when their daughter was born, but stayed but eventually couldnt take the instability anymore.

How did I know she was a Looney Tune, too many accounts to remember-

1)she signed their then 13 year old daughter to dance school, we were there at the recital and lets say she was the only non-cultured kid there..(there is nothing wrong with that) but you could tell her daughter felt out of place and not to be mean but SD didnt know how to dance well at all...it was for inner city kids, not rich people.BMs family are millionaires, so the dance class was free...that was skeptic episode #1 for me.

2)She started asking me, when my birthday was, do i have any siblings etc...common q's I guess....i wouldnt ask my exs gf those..(by the way she wasnt trying to be friendly, this was her being nosey...)

3)Demanding ridiculous items at christmas times... to get SD $300 UGG Boots, son new WII console on top of other ridiculous requests...she thinks SO is hiding money from her as when they were together, he was bringing in $10-15,000 monthly cheques, former IT Consultant....that was 15 years ago...its really apparent this is not happening now. Calling about CS constantly get a life, you will get your money...just not always when you want it...

4)This really irritated the hell out of me....ive said it before, being overly inquisitve about my vehicle and the posessions within my vehicle...asking, "is that your car?" "wow thats a nice camera" and just this snyde look on her face while she was asking it b.....meanwhile she forgets to mention SS failed gr.8.

5)Asking SO if all his money was going to me...you broke up like almost 15 years ago...f off!

All of the above is when I realized, you really should have your own cartoon show....this shit cant be real...trust me it is!

The moment I realized our BM was crazy was when she insisted we pay for a dog sitter for her dog because I wouldn't let it come over every other weekend and terrorize my house and pets.

The first (and last I think) I actually met BM1 and really had a conversation with her (because her screaming out her apt. window at me doesn't count) She just popped up with a story to 'warn' me about FDH. Since I had a kid I would understand.

She told me all about how she asked him to go half on clothing she bought for SDat the time 3. He said he would have to think about it, but most likely he could help. So she went out and spent $400 on clothing, and Then mean old FDH said there was no way he could give her that much money! He just set her up for financial ruin! How could he do that to her? "So now you know what he's like, he seems like a hardowrking guy, but he's selfish." I just stared at her, she seemed to be waiting for my approval of her story or something. I ended the conversation with "I work 45 hours a week and my sons father feels CS is beneath him, he refuses to get a job and will hit my baby if I leave BS there to be watched. I think the fact that you are still standing here after pulling a stunt like that actually makes FDH look pretty damn good right now, I used to get slapped for washing the dishes the 'wrong way'"

She walked away and hasn't talked ot me since - other than screaming insults out windows after FDH refuses to fight with her.

I only heard BM's side of the story when we went to court for custody. From what she says DH was an abusive drug addict who did nothing but party and beat her and SS(then)1. He even had a DV so it MUST be true :sick: . The truth is that she's a worthless moron who would do absolutely nothing all day even though she didn't work. Whenever DH and BM fought and the fight wasn't going BM's way she would call the police claiming domestic violence. They cops went to their house several times but couldn't prove anything either way until one night DH took the cell phone BM was using to call the cops on him yet again. That was enough to prove DV because they considered that to be preventing her from contacting help. After she calmed down she said she would go to the police to get it all straightened out, shockingly enough Captain Useless never followed through with it. I've been with DH for four years and have known him since I was 13 yrs old and he has never once shown any sort of violence towards me or our children. She, on the other hand, has had multiple police visits since she's moved on to other men. Me thinks the lady doth protest too much and calls the police too frequently.
The moment I knew she was bat shit crazy was when I saw the fight that her and (then)SO were having. She was pissed that DH wouldn't give her money for SS(then)2 which she insisted was for shoes. DH said that we had plenty of clothes and if she didn't have enough money to get him proper clothing for the weather then we would be more than happy to have him until she was able to. Apparently, that wasn't a good enough answer.