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Hatebeingastepmother4's picture

Submitted by Hatebeingastepm... on Sun, 07/07/2013 - 9:14am

In all my web searches it was recommended to start blogging or to join a forum to vent. So here I go... I'm very tired of being number 2 in my family. My husband constantly holds his daughter above me and has even said that she is number one in his life. So why did I marry him? I really thought it would get better. I'm very delusional apparently. I use to love my step daughter, the her father kept taking her side in everything and then the ex wife started talking shit about me and mow I feel like all three are against me. It's sickening. I'm the only one who helps my step daughter academically and medically. I dump so much tine, energy and money into her. It's to the point that I hate my step daughter, my husbands ex wife and i'm starting to hate my husband. I would have left him by now if I wasn't pregnant with his kid. I thought that would fix some things... Again delusional. For months it can be SO good with no fighting and my step daughter not coming over. Then there is an explosion that leads to my husband and I fighting. It's fueled by his ex wife and daughter. I'm so tired of this shit. I've been through counseling and i'm seeking a new counselor. I just need to vent.

Comments

purpledaisies's picture

Submitted by purpledaisies on Sun, 07/07/2013 - 9:26am

First stop doing anything for your SD make your dh do it all. You are not her mom and never will be and they will remind you every chance they get. You have a baby on the way to focus on not her besides she has parents and you are not one if them.

I'm sorry you feel second and it shouldn't be that way kids are your #1 responsiblity and your spouce is #1 priority there is a difference and tour dh needs to get that.

oldone's picture

Submitted by oldone on Sun, 07/07/2013 - 8:31pm

Please inform your DH (dickhead) that his daughter may be number one in HIS life but she sure as hell isn't number one in YOUR life.

You are probably like most of us who were raised to put others first. That can work very well when it is reciprocated. But when you are dealing with people that put you down and do nothing to look out for your welfare it becomes MANDATORY that you put yourself first above them.

Your needs and wants should trump your husband's and SD's - always. Of course that is not the optimum way to work as a family but you have to deal with what you have. No way you should just lie down and let them tromp on you. Especially since you have a child on the way.