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SD MAY HAVE RUINED MY CHANCES!

dispiritedstepmom2011's picture

i am livid right now. i did a livescan background check to work in a daycare. i pretty much have the job, the director loves me, i did my CEU's and going to take the comp test.

ok, so my employer calls me to say the background came back that i am up for review, not cleared. she is upset cause she wants me to start, but legally cant have me start until i am cleared by DCF. i understand that. she had me call to see what was up and all they could tell me was that there is something on my record that needs reviewing before they decide if i can be cleared or not. i can think of 2 situations that MAY hinder me from being cleared:

1. when exsd was 9, she told her school i beat her. dcf came out. i was cleared cause sd had no marks on her (never beat that kid) and her story kept changing.

2. just last october, sd attacked me, bruised up the left side of my face. she told her therapist that I hit HER...cpi comes out, sees me, sees her (no marks cause she attacked me) and that was cleared.

hell, a year and a half ago i was cleared by dcf to have my nephew if he needed to be placed with me! and that was inbetween the 2 false accusations!

i even did a livescan background 3 months ago when i was going to work as a companion/homemaker. reason i didnt start working was an exsd-related thing, but point is i was cleared then! is daycare and working with elderly different?

my friend, who has run a home daycare for the last 13yrs, told me that it could be cause of the cpi record from exsd's accusations. im scared, cause my human services degree i am almost done getting will mean NOTHING if i am not cleared....

StickAFork's picture

Don't make any assumptions.
Find out what gives.

Disneyfan's picture

I know each area is different, but you would not be able to work in a NYC city funded day care center with those items on your record. As a matter of fact, ACS (same as DFC) oversees day care centers (city funded) here.

Regardless of what happens with this job, work on getting those items removed from your record.

dispiritedstepmom2011's picture

so even though they were closed right away and were FALSE accusations, them being on my record could make it to where i cant work in a daycare? how do i get them taken off?

StickAFork's picture

The "review" they are doing may just be to find out what happened with those charges. If they show up, they may just want more information.
Can you run the livescan yourself and find out exactly what shows up on it?

I'm so sorry. Years ago, my best friend accused her dad of awful things. These people had a history of fostering/adopting needy kids. After that... no more. She fully retracted everything (she's pretty messed up) but the damage was done. No more fostering and adopting. Sad

Then my SD accused SS of molesting her. He had always wanted to be a teacher. No more. Time to find a new plan. In this case, there was some small truths to the accusations...but REALLY small.

dispiritedstepmom2011's picture

i paid for the scan, not my employer. so im going to try and get a copy of whats showing up. it may cost me but i need to know. im scared. im angry. im happy that exsd is being harrassed in rehab by other kids and had her toothbrush dipped in feces...cause this little bitch has done more damage to my life than everyone knows!

im going to be on the phone tomorrow calling whoever i can to find out wtf. the one question i need answered is if i just wasted 3 years going to school cause of this. one of the questions anyways.

dispiritedstepmom2011's picture

how old is ur SS? wow that just sucks! you know, maybe i should persue a carreer with animals.....

StickAFork's picture

He's 24 now; he was 17 (I think) at the time. Maybe 18??

Seriously... I've decided I don't like people much. After my kids are raised and productive members of society, I'm going to start an animal rescue and enjoy the fact that they don't judge, they aren't evil, and they love unconditionally. Smile

dispiritedstepmom2011's picture

i agree, animals are sooo much better than people. i called dcf background thing and was told i have to wait for my employer to receive it before i can get a copy...how stupid, i paid for it! i guess i will just have to wait and see.

how sad for ur SS...although u did say there was small truth to it....but still, children are evil and have too much power.

StickAFork's picture

Yeah, the "small truth" was...he called her in to the bathroom while he was showering when he was 12 and she was 8. I *think* he asked her to touch him around the same ages...the stories changed. Sad
SS was also caught jacking off with HIS MOTHER'S underwear. How gross it THAT?!?
When this all came out, I stopped allowing him in my home and didn't let him hang out unsupervised with my kids. (We didn't live together then.)
What a f*cking mess that was.

DH's family now? It's like it never even happened. He's around his little cousins all the time. There is NO cure for stupid.

At least MIL isn't saying that my kids will accuse his of sexual abuse anymore.

StickAFork's picture

OMG, it's SO weird that you said this. Just yesterday, I was looking at a local shelter (volunteer hours for my sons) and couldn't believe the number of animals there because their guardian had died. It was SO sad!! I couldn't believe that no friends/family would take them.
It started a conversation with my mother...who, along with my father, adopted FOUR rescue kittens a year ago...and my folks are OLD. It's likely the cats will outlive them. She's like, well, I sure hope you take them, because there's no way your brother will!

I want a rescue that cares for the old animals who people discard because they aren't "fun" anymore. The ones with medical bills, less energy, but great hearts. They just want to live out the remainder of their days feeling loved. <3

Disneyfan's picture

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