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Over orange juice???

ocs's picture

Submitted by ocs on Thu, 01/30/2014 - 8:01am

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SD14 was here a little while ago. She has not been here since last April btw. She has visited her Daaaaadddddyyyyy outside of the home, and we've seen her at my In-laws house, but not here.

She comes into the kitchen and asks for orange juice, I say, "Sorry skid, water or Perrier, it's all we have. We don't really drink juice, so we don't have any"

skid " What do you mean? Are you sure? because you usually have it?" with a bit of a sneer.

me, "well, when was the last time you were here or visited? I pick it up if I know you're coming."

She had nothing to say and now has told her counselor she feels unwelcome and unloved.

BM screeched to DH that we have to stock our fridge for princess snowflake... smh...

Elizabeth's picture

Submitted by Elizabeth on Thu, 01/30/2014 - 8:38am

Ha ha, reminds me of the great ham debacle at our house when SD still lived with us. DH eats turkey lunch meat, but SD only likes ham. So Dh said I had to have ham on hand at all times. Only he insisted on the kind you buy from the deli that only stays fresh for one week max. SD would NEVER lift a hand to make her own sandwich or her own lunch, so I would buy the ham (at $6 a pound) and it would sit in the fridge and go bad and get thrown out, and then I would have to buy more. I finally stopped buying, and THEN SD wanted a sandwich and both she and DH were cranky with me because we didn't have ham. Gah!

Tuff Noogies's picture

Submitted by Tuff Noogies on Thu, 01/30/2014 - 8:45am

"Are you sure? because you usually have it". what is it with stupid questions like that? "are you sure?" no, dumbass, the grocery fairy brings stuff overnight so we never really know what's in there. GAH!

ocs's picture

Submitted by ocs on Thu, 01/30/2014 - 8:54am

no, DH wouldn't do that.

and- for the most part visitation with them happens when I'm home, or after school. If he sees her after school, they stay in that part of town.

If its a weekend, he picks her up and goes out. SD and I are on shaky ground, so none of us have any desire to 'run' into each other.

ocs's picture

Submitted by ocs on Thu, 01/30/2014 - 8:46am

omg.

That's exactly what we would experience. DH and I eat as clean as we can, I grocery shop 3-4 times a week, so everything is fresh and our schedule is unpredictable with work, so I hate throwing things out if I buy too much.

SD made a comment in March/ April about a food she like to eat. I bought it for her next visit, which should have been in April... ummmm... yeah.... It is almost February on a NEW YEAR. It's totally something DH and i wouldn't buy, so when he saw it- he was like, 'huh??' I let it go bad- and showed him when I tossed it. it was not the first time...

ocs's picture

Submitted by ocs on Thu, 01/30/2014 - 8:51am

@ punkin- LOVE it

The counselor is a tool. I posted elsewhere about it, but he is also the same counselor that says she should be able to text and ipod and smartphone her way through visitation, since BM has lax rules about it. DH is too strict you see.... :?

ocs's picture

Submitted by ocs on Thu, 01/30/2014 - 8:49am

Tuff noogies- I said once to her that the money tree was in the back yard and the dummy went to look...

Tuff Noogies's picture

Submitted by Tuff Noogies on Thu, 01/30/2014 - 8:52am

:jawdrop: gosh she sounds like mss... "i dont know how to fill the dog's water bucket. i've never done it before."

if bm screeched at me for no oj, i'd tell her to buy it her damn self.

Calypso1977's picture

Submitted by Calypso1977 on Thu, 01/30/2014 - 9:03am

fiance finally put his foot down regarding food waste.

SD13 insisted she wanted snacks she likes (not the healthy stuff we eat) in order to feel more at home.

she requested peanut butter - opened it and ate one bite, never touched it again.

she requested potato chips - bought her a bag of 8 snack sizers. she ate one bag and never touched them again.

she requested oreos - bought her a bag which she insisted had to be refrigerated. she ate maybe 6 cookies and never touched them again.

she requested cheddar goldfish - bought 2 bags, she ate one, never touched the other.

he is done buying her snacks. she also has a habit of putting too much on her plate. she gets pissed now when provided with smaller portions - we always tell her if you finish it and are hungry you can have more. guess what she still doesnt finish the smaller portions either!

the kid mainly subsists on junk. she's rail thin now, but i secretly want her to pork out when she's older which she probably will. i know, mean and petty.

sbm014's picture

Submitted by sbm014 on Thu, 01/30/2014 - 9:10am

I would have laughed. SS knows better to say anything about we do or do not have in the house to me. He once complained we didn't have any snacks he liked and I told him there was water in the fridge to help balance hunger.

I typically buy groceries for myself when DH is not home, and then I will buy some for the first few days he is but it is what I want, not absurd things SS ask for. Like he once told me that I didn't get the right fruit snacks because they didn't have 'box tops' I looked at him and told him he could eat them or get DH to buy something else...needless to say DH said next time THEY went to the store he'd get the other ones but that SS was stuck with what I bought until they were gone.

I know he has complained to BM and grandma I don't keep certain things in the house. I know this as once grandma sent him a "care pack" I rolled my eyes, and threw it away this past weekend as he had eaten one thing out of it in 3 months as he had forgot and dealt with what we had again. He once told BM I didn't keep chocolate [I do but it is only dark which he doesn't like] in the house so BM took him fudge to school and dropped it off for him. Mind you yes I keep chocolate he doesn't like but DH would buy him chocolate if he would speak up, I just don't think about it. DH never let it in the house as he didn't want me to feel insulted - again SS had one piece and DH said he was sick of seeing something from her so threw it away like two days later.

I always dealt with what was in the house, so can these kids. I don't mind buying something special if I know it will be eaten, but I am not going out of my way to make my house all about a child.

ocs's picture

Submitted by ocs on Thu, 01/30/2014 - 10:25am

We rarely buy junk- for some parties and let's say this sunday- hell yes- there's junk! LOL

We stopped buying kid specific snacks LONG ago, but some stuff, like juice and pretzels, I was happy to accommodate.

My DH is also sick of buying stuff only to toss it and BM has ZERO say in my kitchen.

Quite frankly, I may tell her I tossed the OJ to make room for more wine.... She will run straight to her crack whore mommmmmyyyyyyy.

sbm014's picture

Submitted by sbm014 on Thu, 01/30/2014 - 10:34am

Haha. I would tell her about making room for wine. I'm sure SS will tell BM this next time if it's not drank by then that I had wine in the house. DH and I quit drinking shortly after we got together as it was more of a problem. Every once in a while we will bring something into the house but normally gets blamed on me.

I don't mind juice, pretzels, fruit snack etc - my issue was him telling me I didn't get the expensive brand, and so it wasn't good enough. I make half what DH does, and still try to help provide for some food while they were home, most of the time DH will give me money as it is more with them as I will eat left-overs for days.