BM's new BF served court papers to FDH
I don't have much time as I'm at work on break, but this is eating me up and I would love any advice that you may have. I am in Canada, so I'm not sure how many Canadians are on this site 
Quick background. My FDH and I have been together 9 years this October. BM has been married and divorced and is now dating a guy that went to jail for something during their relationship together. My FDH and his ex unfortunately have 2 kids together (one of them my FDH is not sure of).
So, earlier this week, out of NOWHERE, BMs new BF knocked on our door and served my FDH with court papers. Basically, she wants a re-evaluation of his income as she (of course) wants more money! She thinks that my FDH owns or has a share in MY company, so she's trying to go after that. Anyways, I opened MY own company last year and my FDH helps me out with it around his day job (my company is a night job). He takes no income out of it. Hell, I barely take any income out of it. It's a new company and doesn't have any money to take yet! I'm wondering if she has any legal ground to stand on as far as my company is concerned? I work full time at a University, part time at a College and own my own business! She sits on welfare and is complaining that she needs more money!!! GET A JOB!!! I am getting a lawyer and will show him/her all of the paper work so that they can see that he's NEVER been paid from the company and owns not 1% of it.
Also, the papers stated that I am not to be around while the kids are visiting because me and my FDH fight! :jawdrop: Um... yes, we argue sometimes, but OMG!!! I've never raised my voice to those kids or even tell them what to do. That is all up to my FDH. I have NO criminal record what-so-ever and have never even been rude to the gold digger! But, it's ok for her to date and live with some guy that just got out of jail?!?! I just don't know what to do anymore. This is consuming me. My feelings are hurt and I did nothing to deserve this.
About 4 years ago, BM lied to child maintenance saying that my FDH wasn't paying support (they only had $100 payment arrangements and she cancelled maintenance as he was paying her $500/month) for 7 years! My FDH has PAGES of her signatures saying that she got the money for the child support, but yet, he still ended up having to pay these bogus backpayments for 7 years as he couldn't afford a lawyer at the time. Well, now we sure as hell are getting a lawyer and I am bringing all of this up too! Also, my FDH doesn't think that one of the kids is his so we are going to get a DNA test done as well. She also drives the kids around town with no drivers license and I have proof of that straight off of her facebook wall! Please, is this all going to work out or am I doing something wrong? I wish I could have controlled who I could fall in love with, because sometimes I feel that it's just not worth any of this!!! I don't have enough time to deal with all of this, but she just sits on welfare, scams the system and stirs up shit every couple of years! I am so excited to get a lawyer this time!!!
yes and make damn sure you
yes and make damn sure you get it where BM's boy toys have no right to come on your property to hand you paperwork, it's none of his business!
If they come back on my
If they come back on my property, I am telling them to get the hell off of it and slamming the door in their faces.
I have no idea. Everything
I have no idea. Everything was fine and dandy 2 weeks ago. Neither one of us seen this coming :?
Your FDH can tell the courts
Your FDH can tell the courts that he is the guy that "jumps out of the cake" for your business and as payment you give him a Smartie and a can of Ginger Ale. It won't make a woot of difference. The judge is just going to look at his last tax returns and BM's and apply the good old CS calculator.
Lol!!! Smartie and a can of
Lol!!! Smartie and a can of Ginger Ale!!! hahaha!! He doesn't even get that right now!!! Hopefully one day the business will be successful and we can reap the rewards of all our hard work! Only 6 1/2 more years of this crap!!!
In the states only parents
In the states only parents income is used for cs. Also anyone can deliver court papers unless they have a RO in place. If BM doesn't want you around skids then be sure to have it so BM BF's can be around them either. But that seems stupid that BM would go there since you and FDH have been together 9 years. CS for the child that may not be FDH, not sure you'll get any where with that because you waited to long to speak up. I would buy a home DNA test and wait for the results to come in. Then if the child is not his tell your lawyer.
I don't get it either. It was
I don't get it either. It was out of no where! I've always stayed out of FDH and BMs business with the kids. I don't want to know her, see her, talk to her, anything! It's been that way for the past 8 1/2 years and then all of a sudden, the kids can't be around ME?!!? Oh, but it was ok for me to watch her kid from another dad last year! She wasn't worried about anything then! I think she's jealous that I have my own company, a degree, 2 diploma's, am 4 years younger than her, and she doesn't even have her grade 8!!!
Nothing is stopping BM from
Nothing is stopping BM from making any claim she wants. Doesn't mean she is going to get it. Donkeykong was making all kinds of asinine demands of me and DW before the judge rendered a decision on custody. One summer, we were visited by a Bailiff on six seperate occasion with a motion to "cease and desist or else" .
I helped DW email a reply to Donkeykong and his lawyer in which we only stated; 'We choose else'
Fuck 'em...You got nothing to lose.
Thank you!!! I am really
Thank you!!! I am really trying, but it's hard. I am hurt by it. I feel like an outcast in a family that was. I don't know. I had SS's on my facebook and since she served FDH with papers, they blocked me (I know it wasn't them, rather her) and I just don't know what I did to deserve this! FDH says it's nothing to do with me and that she's trying to get to him, but why?!?!!? It's been 9 years!
And, yes, we have argued when they boys have been over. I am not going to say that we haven't. But it's not like it's to the point where the neighbours are calling the cops on us or anything. Like, I'm sure that when she got divorced from her husband that it was a walk in the park and the kids never heard a peep! Also, with her new BF, they've already broken up twice!!! Must be because they get along so well!
They haven't even been together for 6 months yet and he spent 2 of those months behind bars. I heard through the grape vine that it was for an assault on his ex. Karma's a bitch! I wish karma was like pizza where you could have it delieverd in 30 minutes or less }:)
I nominate this comment for
I nominate this comment for the "One Thousand Thumbs Up" award.
No it's the shoes in
No it's the shoes in RisingAboveIt's icon.
Yeah. Yeah that's it.
THANK YOU!!! This is great
THANK YOU!!! This is great advice!!! FDH doesn't know what he's in for when I walk through that door after work today!!! LOL! I have a LOT of built up stress that I need to get rid of and that sounds like a great way of dealing with everything!!!
>BMs new BF knocked on our
>BMs new BF knocked on our door and served my FDH with court papers. <
I stopped reading after this point.
Why is the BM's new BF serving your FDH with court papers? If she is filing a motion with the courts it HAS TO BE served by a bailif (at her expense). So you can tell your FDH to tear those papers up. They are not legally binding documents.
Not true Draco. They can be
Not true Draco. They can be served if filing a motion with anyone over 18. The courts in my state want to try a resolve between parties even after docs are served. Sometimes it happens & never reaches court.
Even for a claim for a rise
Even for a claim for a rise in CS!?
That's news to me.
I understand family mediation is encouraged to take its course and not get the courts involved but this case looks like it is beyond that.
What state do you live in?
What state do you live in? Weird my state seems so much tougher (or lenient) in comparison with yours. I remember your state won't let a minor stand up in court. Ours had no problem when the legal guardian suggested it.
That's not what I said. I
That's not what I said. I said if a minor wants to make a motion for a change in custody, the minor need not even show up to court. Only the GAL, and the parents (and parents' attornies) have to be present. But family mediation is "strongly encouraged" before the courts are called to intervene.
Oh okay. Here, if skid wanted
Oh okay. Here, if skid wanted he can since 16 he can speak for himself. So his choice was in camera or in court. He actually wants to testify against his mother. I can't see that not taking a toll on him in life. But the legal guardian won't even talk to us about it--it's his decision.
I hope his mother gets what she deserves in hell.
But it's still process they
But it's still process they go by.
If it's just a for usual increase in CS, then no need, you just file. However, if you're suing your ex for a discovery to show all his proof of income, including the SO's or current wife, that's a different story altogether.
Okay, I think you and I are
Okay, I think you and I are more or less saying the same thing here. From the way I read the OP, it sounded like BM's exboyfriend just showed up to the door with court papers stating that she wants FDH to "give it up". That's like my neighbor coming into my house saying he has a "warrant". The warrant may be legal, but my neighbor does not in any way have any legal power to execute the warrant. See what I am saying?
LOL I don't think anyone's
LOL I don't think anyone's that stupid. Wait maybe...
Unless he's drawing a salary
Unless he's drawing a salary or earning dividends, then you have nothing to worry about.
You're not married yet, it's your business, not your FDH.
His help with your business is irrelevant (again as long as he's not drawing a salary or earning dividends).
I am a partner in a company,
I am a partner in a company, and before I got married (in the US), I asked about future businesses, and my current business. As long as it's in YOUR name she isn't able to collect a DIME!
If you BOTH own the biz, in
If you BOTH own the biz, in writing, with BOTH your names on it, then get a lawyer ASAP.
This is one of the many reasons we're in court. CS is based on income, in my state it's a high percentage. We have a business together. But I have one in my name with other business partners--none of them being DH. She can't touch that.
See a lawyer just so you can get a poker face on... don't let her see your concerned or she'll take it further.
His name is on NOTHING! It's
Is he own the business
Is he own the business incorporation papers? If he is, you have a problem. I own my co and DH at the advice of my lawyer said to keep DH off of everything until the kids are over 18, because BM would have a right to the income of the business.
Nope It's 100% mine!
Nope
It's 100% mine!
Good for you! She can't touch
Good for you! She can't touch it.
Hi there, I'm in Canada
Hi there, I'm in Canada too.
Are by chance talking about OUR BM? lol they sound like they're cut from the same cloth...
So some similarities, our BM is after more money too and I feared she'd be able to tap into the investments I have. (She can't.) And she can't touch your company or money either UNLESS you use your money to support your DH. In that case a court WOULD consider your income as par for CS obligations.
As for your last paragraph, I would definitely get a lawyer to look into stuff regarding money your DH had to pay if it was above and beyond what he was supposed to pay for CS based on his income. If it was an amount that he and BM came up with on a verbal agreement, that won't hold as once a case goes to court they automatically follow the tables set for CS. But from my understanding they can only go back as far as 3 yrs from the point the issue arose and goes to court. Does that make sense?
As for getting a DNA test because 1 child may or may not be DH's, this kind of makes me really sad for the child. Does your DH not consider the child his? Do they not know him as their father and dad in every sense? Would your DH be doing it for any other reason than to escape paying CS for the child if its found out he not the bio father? Regardless, I wouldn't be surprised if the courts still made him pay CS for the child even IF a DNA proved he wasn't the dad. Reason being, he acted as the father, accepted the child as his own up until it became a matter of the BM wanting more CS. KWIM?
We're about close to finding out what our BM is going to get in respect to more CS. She has shot herself in the foot time and time again with comments and such but unfortunately this isn't based on their character. Its solely based on my DH's income and she'll get what she can. I was relieved she can't touch my stuff too. Made me so angry the greedy DC (dumpster cunt) wanted what's MINE and here she's only taking care of ONE kid that she gets CS for and I have 4 kids I don't get CS for. She's the true sense of the word douche bag lol
Good luck!
Thanks everyone for your
Thanks everyone for your posts! Some were VERY helpful
So, I just found out today that BM's bf just got out of jail last fall for setting a bunch of cars on fire (over $80,000 in damages). He went to jail for a year and was released last year. THEN, in Feb. of this year he was in jail for something else (I couldn't find out for what). And she's worried about ME and my FDH arguing in front of the kids! :jawdrop: Really?!?!!? What is wrong with these people and how are they allowed to reproduce?!?!?