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What if DH does agree with BM? What if he does think you're being too harsh on the SKs?

Anon2009's picture

I was talking with DH about this.

Now, he's never agreed with BM on anything. But if he were to agree on something with her, he says he'd not say anything but "let me get back to you," and then talk it over with me and tell me why he agrees with BM.

If he thought I was being too harsh on SKs, he'd talk with me about that in private and then I'd go back to SKs and say, "I apologize for being too harsh. Instead, xyz is going to happen."

Where exactly do teen SKs fit in....as children or adults?

Anon2009's picture

My OSD was asking me this recently. She said the teachers at her school call them "young adults" but also sometimes say, "you kids." She said they do that at all grade levels in this school (she's a senior in HS and has been going to this school since the beginning of her freshman year). She was saying she, along with her friends, was confused by where they stand, as the teachers are overheard telling other kids, "you need to show respect for adults" but then say, "you are old enough to know not to act like this."

Blaming the Skids-also on the General Discussion Forum

Anon2009's picture

So many kids on this site and in society are being set up to fail because they got stuck with pathetic, pi$$ poor parents, and then so many posters on this site blame the kids for acting out. It just is mind boggling. I think that instead of being consumed with so much anger towards these kids, we need to direct that anger to the root of the problem: the "parents."

Do you ever feel for BMs

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I have to admit I do at times, because:

A) many have mental illnesses. Either they're diagnosed or undiagnosed. That's got to be hard.

Dirol It's got to be hard watching another woman do motherly things for your kids, especially if the bm isn't the one who wanted the breakup/divorce.

C) It's got to be hard if sm truly was the other woman and now is helping to raise the kids.

BMs calling our kids half-siblings to their kids

Anon2009's picture

Dh and I have been contemplating adopting. Bm isn't involved too much but I fear she may start saying things like that. I don't see SDs buying it, but you never know. What do you think about BMs calling our kids half siblings? To me, it's rude and unnecessary. There's enough division in this world. However, maybe these same women also call their prior/subsequent kids half siblings to our sks.

The Prodigal Son

Anon2009's picture

So many of our SKs remind me of him. They blow their money. Others act out. Many are rude. Many do lots of stupid things.

The Prodigal Son got welcomed back with open arms by his father. I think many (not all) fathers on this site would do the same as they love their kids unconditionally. No matter how badly they screwed up. I think many of us (not all) would welcome our kids back the same way that father did, no matter how badly they screwed up.

So where does that, in your opinion, leave us SPs?

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