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How Do I Respond to This? It Hasn't Happened Before.

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A few days ago SS11 said that even though he calls me by my first name he wanted me to know he tells his friends I am his Mom. This conversation arose because his friend asked him if he would be more upset if I died or BM. She is 9 and has been asking about the step parent thing since her parents are newly divorced.

SS13 heard this conversation and really chewed out SS11 like he was a piece of poop.

I split them up because it got really ugly.

When I said good night that night, SS13 was cold and distant with me.

SS11 was really clingy.

Reading Old Blog Entries ...

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I just read some of my old blog entries from a couple years ago, and the ones from my old account (BM figured out I was on here so I had to change accounts).

I don't know if this is a good or bad thing, but I have changed in how I deal with the boys. Sadly, I still get so angry with BM and wish, wish, WISH I could find it in my heart to forgive this woman for what she did to SS11 when he was younger.

I also have to laugh. I can't believe how snotty I can be - at times, immature - and how territorial I am. So stupid!

Facebook - Frigging Drama Book

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I am so annoyed that I can't really compose this blog entry very well.

SS13 has an FB account. WHILE I was creating it with him and showing him how to use it and putting all kinds of Blocks on the damn thing, BM texts DH LOADS of messages about me blocking her etc. That she knew it was me who was not displaying her as the MOTHER.

He had an active account for about ten minutes!!!

Anyway, I tried to block her so I wouldn't see any of her crap posts on SS13's page but she beat me to it.

I think I am annoyed because she technically WON this one.

Grrr.

Just When I Thought I Had it Figured Out

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SS13 and SS11 have started a new school. If they didn't get in to the school now, then they couldn't start for another 2 years. It's a public charter school so it was just one of those opportunities we jumped at.

SS13 is an odd kid and he can be sweet when he isn't driving me or DH nuts.

SS11 is entering that annoying phase where he wants to stay a little kid but also wants to grow up.

Well I Guess That Explains It

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SS13 (just had his birthday) has become hilarious in his old age.

On his birthday, at the breakfast table, he says "SM, I FEEL different now that I am 13." I look at him like he is crazy and gave him some of the waffles we are eating. Then he puts his fork down and very quietly and seriously says "I'm actually kind of worried. I mean my underwear even feels tight."

I blush and reply "Perhaps you should talk to your Dad about that?"

Back to ST After a Long Break! LOL!!!

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So it has been a very long time since I last posted here but the therapy that you can get is worth it ...
My last post was in April 2011 and I thought we "lost" custody of SS9 and SS11 ... who are both a year older.
What a difference a year makes.

In a year, I deployed AGAIN and in that year, DH found some deep rooted anger and didn't take the fight laying down. He shelled out another $3k and went back to court for the kids. He won by getting another judge - thank God for the appeal process. I say he "won" but it doesn't seem like it.

Lost the Fight

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DH and BM went to court yesterday. The date was moved to an earlier one.
DH lost.
Didn't see this coming.
The boys will be going to see her for the summer and staying there instead of coming back to us.
This means when I get back from deployment, my family will be gone.

It was my biggest fear and now it has come true.
I hate to say this but what is the point in going on?

Far Away Enough to Feel Powerless and Close Enough to Feel the Pain

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I didn't think I would be posting due to the fact that I can't feel too much drama as a stepmom when I am deployed.
Yeah that was naive.
BM and DH are about to have their final hearing in the custody battle for SS11 and SS9. I thought everything would be okay but she has taken some things the boys said and taped it. I feel sick just thinking about it.

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