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Still no contact from X or son..

lovin-life's picture

BF told my son Thursday morning when his Dad took him "to call your mother & let her know what's going on".

I also left a voice message on X's cell phone..early Thursday Evening for x to call me. It's Saturday...I've heard nothing from either one of them.

I'll call his family...and see if they know what's going on..

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lovin-life's picture

Just spoke to x's mother. Told her I've heard he's gone for 1) weekend 2) week and 3) 2 weeks ... that I can't reach him and have no idea what's really going on.

She said no he's just in that end of the province for the weekend ..for GF's reunion....but she also said he's not in (her) town yet..but she also said that he might be stayiing next at 1) her house 2) his brothers cottage... The reunion is in a different town..how can they be there and at his mothers for the same weekend.

I'm still confused!!! I asked her to get X to call me!!

lovin-life's picture

X finally called earlier this evening....fought with daughter on the phone...then asked to speak to me. I asked him why he couldn't notify me ...when talking my son on vacation. He said "DON"T EVEN GO THERE!!!" ....like I"M the one out of line!!

So instead of telling me when he plans on bringing my son home... He starts all these crazy accusatiohns....

Blamed me for her tournements landing on his weekend..... and not telling him.. First of all I don't make up her sports schedule!!! And he's known about this tournement for 5 or 6 weeks...same as me.

Then he starts holloring at me about a Ringette tournement back in March....that landed on his weekend. said I didn't tell him about that. All the information was on the web-site .... which I gave him...!!! Same place I get my information!!!!!! If he was interested enough to LOOK IT UP!!!!!!!

Then he humg up on me.....!!!!

He has such an audience at his mothers!!!!!! He's in the wrong for taking our son..without telling anyone!!!! AND he can't try to shift everything around onto me!!!

lovin-life's picture

He still hasn't told me when he plans on returning my son! I get the impression from his statement and his tone of voice ...he thinks its none of my business!!! He just hung up in my ear.

My daughter had answered the phone..and asked him when her brother was coming home. Instead of telling her right away..he asked Why? She said because you said a couple of different things and nobody knows for sure. Then he started to tear a strip off of her!!

He insists on passing what little information he chooses to share with me through the kids... Putting them directly in the middle!

I have several e-mails over the last year or two where I've asked him not to put the kids in the middle..or relay information through them....... he refuses to stop!!!! I told him he doesn't have to speak to me...I prefer to not speak to him..because of other incidents...to e-mail information etc.

Apparently she hit the flash button on the phone so she didn't have to listen to his rantings. I was upstairs I had no idea he was even on the phone...Then he wanted to speak to me.

Tore a strip off me ... for questioning why he couldn't inform me that he was taking son on vacation...and for what period of time!

My daughter told me afterwards..that her father said son will he home on Sunday.

Well... we are out of town that weekend....its our tournament weekend!!!! There will be no-one home Sunday!!!!!!

How do you deal with such a difficult person??

I'm just furious but I don't want to do anything out of anger!
I'm thinking about calling the courthouse and filing for an order for interim custody & support & reqeusting they appoint an advocate or counsellor or do an assessment of the parenting/visitation situation to help figure out what's best for the benefit of the kids...

I don't think he has their best interests in mind..leaving town without telling me, leaving no child support. Playing these stupid games and using the kids vacation as an opportunity to "stick it to me".. AS well as a list of other issues

Does that make sense? Am I acting in their best interests or out of anger?!!!! I'm so mad...I don't have clear judgement..right now!

lovin-life's picture

Yes...I really don't want to make things worse for the kids. I would want someone (counsellor..phsychologist etc) whose court affiliated...who understands divorce issues..the affects on the kids..as well as someone who can give me some direction.etc. I can't act in thier best interests if I don't know what that is..in this situation!! Do I force my daughter to visit against her will? How do I make him stop playing games? Can the court make him stop?
What should I ask for in an order? What is nonesense and would fuel the situation...and what is necessary for the childrens sake?

HE's being so unreasonable. Yet he proposes joint custody..where we communicate and reach conclusions and joint decisions on what goes on with the kids. He talks a great talk on paper...He just doesn't practice it!!!

HE refuses to give my son his ADD presciption when with him..this was the course of action recommended by one general pratitioner & 2 pediatricians...3 medical opionions..plus my own..plus a couple teachers..etc. We are at odds on that!

He let our daughter into a swimming pool with a cast on her leg...dispite..the orthopedic surgeons..and childrens hospital and my direction that she must avoid water/sand..etc!!!!

I really don't think his parental judgement is on .... at all!!!

Thanks for your input...I need that I'm so upset right now....