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The small annoyances

anyha's picture

Submitted by anyha on Thu, 09/29/2011 - 2:27pm

Is it weird that BM has a picture of her and SO framed and sitting on the bookshelf?

I know they say it's good for the kids sake to have "family" photos, and if it was a picture of the 3 of them i might understand. But, this picture of just him and her from their honeymoon seems kind of ... yuck.

If this woman insists that she has moved on and doesn't want him back or anything, why would she keep this photo DISPLAYED in an area she will see it all the time? It would just seem awkward to me if i had pictures of me and my ex around my house if we were not together.

It's not like this was an oversight either, cause she moved here... which means she CHOSE to put that picture back in it's spot on the bookshelf.

Maybe it's not a big deal, i just get this gut instinct that it's one of those "red flags" people would watch out for that someone isnt over their ex. Besides, no wonder she gets so emotional and upset all the time. She's staring at a constant reminder of what they USED to have, and will never have again.

If it was for the sake of their child, she could have swapped the picture for a more recent one or for one that has the 3 of them in it.

I know, a small thing but it just bugs me.

Comments

starfish's picture

Submitted by starfish on Thu, 09/29/2011 - 2:30pm

does she only put the photo up when she knows you might show up??

b/c that is a very f'd up thing to do, not going to make the new "man" in her life happy....

i would be pissed, but her house nothing you can do. just sit back and enjoy what a loser she is......

anyha's picture

Submitted by anyha on Thu, 09/29/2011 - 2:33pm

It's just up all the time. They've been divorced almost 3 years now though. Seems a bit odd. Most women who move on will at least put the photo away instead of displaying it. Her house seems more like they're still married and he's just away a lot or something.

Doubt she'll be dating anyone soon. Which is too bad cause that would probably solve most of the problems. (i can't imagine any guy she dates wanting to come over to her place and see that photo of her and her ex either. again, if it was the 3 of them. mom/dad/kid i could understand doing it for the kids sake...)

dragonfly5's picture

Submitted by dragonfly5 on Thu, 09/29/2011 - 2:38pm

Yes, it is annoying. Crazo has pictures of my her and my SO's wedding on face book. Not one picture of her and her current husbands wedding, but pictures from the man she cheated on 17yrs ago.

It is very strange.

I hope it is a constant reminder to her of what she lost and I now have. But crazo always wants what she can't have. Then when she gets it she still isn't happy.

Too bad for you crazo your burned that bridge to the ground and MY SO can't stand your nasty self.

Enjoy the fact you have him and she is missing out. I just smile....

Soon-to-be-Step-Mommy's picture

Submitted by Soon-to-be-Step... on Thu, 09/29/2011 - 3:01pm

Yes. Weird. She isn't over him!!! I can see maybe keeping the picture in a box somewhere to give to her kid later in life, but not on display in her home.

giveitago's picture

Submitted by giveitago on Thu, 09/29/2011 - 3:15pm

BM 1 has a really nice pic of her, DH and their son in her living room. I get along with BM 1 though, it's BM 2 who is...well...how shall I put this? She's really got issues, she alienates the kids, she is the proverbial black widow, 'cept they, all four, lived to tell the tale...albeit in financial ruin! #u@k it...tell it like it is, she's a crazy psycho bitch! I do not know if she has pictures up or not...I have no desire to go to her house! The Skids are 18 now so no interaction required. DH has a picture of BM's eldest daughter's wedding and BM is in the picture. It really depends on the motives, I guess?

CalgonTakeMeAway's picture

Submitted by CalgonTakeMeAway on Thu, 09/29/2011 - 3:44pm

It would seem more appropriate to keep photos of your DH in the kid's room, just DH or DH and child, not as a family unit. That has to be confusing for a kid. My SS has a picture of his mom in his room. I don't have a problem with that. So far lightening hasn't struck it (crossing fingers). It is weird.

anyha's picture

Submitted by anyha on Thu, 09/29/2011 - 4:55pm

right. it would make sense to have pictures of "daddy" in the little girls room. I"d even stretch it to not bug me if it was a family picture with all 3, if it was "for the sake of the child". But there's no purpose for a picture of just him and her. A picture i know actually came from their honeymoon. (even though it's just their faces)

It's pretty obvious she can't quite let go of the past i guess. I wouldn't care except her inability to let go of the past is what is causing so many problems currently.

When she puts that picture away.. will probably be the day things finally start getting better. i just have a feeling about this.

fyi, they should start up a dating service where you can pay someone to wine and dine these bm's. (at least for a little bit) It would actually be worth it to pay money to distract her for awhile! (plus, these "dates" could start having problems with how the BM is interacting with her ex, and make all the comments SM's wish they could make) Wouldn't that be great?

"Hmm.. bm (says date) that's kind of weird that you have a picture of you and your ex on display in your living room... are you sure you're over him? Maybe we shouldn't go out..." and see what she said! Of course the guy would be hot so she'd really want him to be interested in her. That would be awesome.

CalgonTakeMeAway's picture

Submitted by CalgonTakeMeAway on Thu, 09/29/2011 - 6:32pm

ROFL...Great idea!! We could match them up by diagnosis! Takes one to know one kind of thing! He'd know how to push all the buttons!